Late Term and Child Loss

Having a rough day

I am sorry, I just need to vent....DH is on shift today (his second since our loss) and the morning isn't so bad because we have a DS which keeps me busy and a friend has come both mornings to just talk...

nap time is rough. I am waiting for my pp period and when I am not thinking about Noah, I think about my period coming...wondering, surfing the TTCAL board, FF website etc...I just want it to come so we can look at the next period, and then ttc.

I am sure this are all normal emotions...I just feel lonely..

image Noah Michael, born sleeping 9/29/12 at 19w 3d. We love you forever Little Man! image
image
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Beta #1 11dpo:89 Progesterone:38.9 Beta #2 18dpo:1940
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Re: Having a rough day

  • I'm sorry you're having a rough day. I know exactly how you feel though. I have the "My Days" app on my phone and I check it constantly (like it's going to change?). I've had one pp period, and am usually super regular so I'm crossing my fingers that my next one is this week so we can TTCAL the begining of Nov. It's the only thing I think about other than Jillian. It's the only thing that gives me hope. We're not telling anyone that we're going to start trying right away so I can't talk to anyone other than DH and he works late.

    Just wanted to let you know that you're not alone in what you're feeling. I hope your day gets better.

    Jillian Rose- born 8/26/12 at 24 weeks. "It broke my heart to lose you but you didn't go alone, for a part of me went with you, the day God took you home"
    I love you always, my beautiful girl.

    Hysteroscopy 3/1/13 Dx: Unicornuate uterus

    || <a href="http://www.fertilityfriend.com" style="font-size:smaller;" >Ovulation TrackeMy Ovulation Chart

    BFP 3/18/13- Please be our Rainbow, we love you so much already.

    6/4/13-Found out we're having a BOY!!

    10/30/13-He's here!! Happy Birthday, Ryan! We love you so much! xo

    Lilypie - (Bfmg)

     

  • thank you...I have always been super regular as well and my doc said that because I had to have a D&C for my placenta it should act as a period and they expected I would get back late this week/this weekend....

    I having been a bit crampy and since my uterus was pretty much back to normal size I don't think its that...I am trying to hope, but not get my hopes up to high if that makes sense...

    when did your period come back? 

    image Noah Michael, born sleeping 9/29/12 at 19w 3d. We love you forever Little Man! image
    image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    BFP: 2/4/13 EDD: 10/11/13
    BabyFruit Ticker
    Patiently waiting for Buggirl to join me!!
    Beta #1 11dpo:89 Progesterone:38.9 Beta #2 18dpo:1940
    HB seen at 6w HB 8w 5d 176bpm! Its a BOY!
    grow rainbow grow!!!!
    All Always Welcome!!
  •     
  • Oh man - I'm in the same exact boat. I spent all weekend waiting for my next period [I had my first period about five weeks after my loss], and it didn't come until today. So only two days off, but I feel myself freaking out already about things staying on track. We hope to start TTC at the beginning of December.

    I hope your day gets better. I totally get how you feel. *hugs*

    ________________________________________________________________________________


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  • image GavinRonansMom:

    thank you...I have always been super regular as well and my doc said that because I had to have a D&C for my placenta it should act as a period and they expected I would get back late this week/this weekend....

    I having been a bit crampy and since my uterus was pretty much back to normal size I don't think its that...I am trying to hope, but not get my hopes up to high if that makes sense...

    when did your period come back? 

    I delivered the placenta so didn't need a D&C, but I had my first period 4 1/2 weeks (31 days, not keeping track or anything ha) after. I'm not sure if I'll continue to be regular since I know that stuff can change but I literally used to get it every 28 days without fail. I'm hoping I get it this week, I've had some cramping and feel bloated..so hopefully.

    It totally makes sense, I feel the same way. I've definitely gotten my hopes up though...I think it just gives me something to focus on other than how sad I am and how much I miss my baby girl.

    Jillian Rose- born 8/26/12 at 24 weeks. "It broke my heart to lose you but you didn't go alone, for a part of me went with you, the day God took you home"
    I love you always, my beautiful girl.

    Hysteroscopy 3/1/13 Dx: Unicornuate uterus

    || <a href="http://www.fertilityfriend.com" style="font-size:smaller;" >Ovulation TrackeMy Ovulation Chart

    BFP 3/18/13- Please be our Rainbow, we love you so much already.

    6/4/13-Found out we're having a BOY!!

    10/30/13-He's here!! Happy Birthday, Ryan! We love you so much! xo

    Lilypie - (Bfmg)

     

  •     
  • I'm so sorry you are having such a rough day, and I am feeling the exact same way as you are.  I'm even lurking on the TTCAL board too.  Al I can focus on is getting my pp period so that I have something to look forward to.  I'm praying that next year at this time I will be close to having another baby, but I know it is wishful thinking.  I am also scared since we really don't know why Ava's heart just stopped beating. I'm so worried about another late term loss.   I think as soon as we get the results of all the tests, whether they give answers or not, that will guide us into whether or not we are truly ready to TTC again.  

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

     Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    BFP#1 - 11/27/09 EDD 8/5/10, DS1 arrived 7/24/10 via emergency c-section.

    BFP#2 - 6/18/12 EDD 2/23/13, sweet baby girl born sleeping on 10/4/12 at 19 weeks, 3 days.

    BFP #3 - 1/18/13 EDD 10/1/13, natural mc on 2/2/13 at 5 weeks, 4 days.

    BFP #4 - 8/29/13 EDD 5/12/14, our sweet rainbow, DS2 born 4/29/14 via c-section

  • I am sorry you are having such a hard day. Huge hugs to you.
  •     
  • Hugs. I am sorry you are having a tough day. Last week was tough for me so I can relate. Our first cycle ttc again did not work. It really hit me hard. I miss my little boy and with his due date coming up... I am so sorry for everything you are going through.
  • Sorry to hear about your day. I completely know what you're going through. My husband is also a firefighter and it sounds like yours works 48 hours straight too. For me, the nights are the toughest, after my daughter goes to bed. I try to schedule playdates and activities for at least one of the days and sometimes a dinner date. It makes the time pass by faster. I hope your second day goes better! 

    Our little boy, born sleeping at 37 weeks. Always loved, always remembered. Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Our sunshine on a cloudy day. Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
  •     
  • Oh and regarding periods, I just started today (8 weeks postpartum). While exclusively breastfeeding my daughter, I got my first one at 6 weeks. Go figure.
    Our little boy, born sleeping at 37 weeks. Always loved, always remembered. Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Our sunshine on a cloudy day. Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
  • thank you everyone...I feel a bit better today. It is so much harder when DH is on his 24h shifts...

    I am PRAYING for my period to come...but I am not going to hold out hope :(

    image Noah Michael, born sleeping 9/29/12 at 19w 3d. We love you forever Little Man! image
    image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    BFP: 2/4/13 EDD: 10/11/13
    BabyFruit Ticker
    Patiently waiting for Buggirl to join me!!
    Beta #1 11dpo:89 Progesterone:38.9 Beta #2 18dpo:1940
    HB seen at 6w HB 8w 5d 176bpm! Its a BOY!
    grow rainbow grow!!!!
    All Always Welcome!!
  •     
  • I am sorry you are having a rough day.

    I am also in the same boat. I lost my first son 6 days after he was born full term. I always wonder if it is normal to want a baby so bad and be thinking about it so much. I want a baby in my arms so bad. It has been 9 weeks for me and still no period Sad

     My OB said to call her if I make it to 12 weeks with no period for medication to induce a period.

    Sending you hugs. I hope we both get our period soon.



    http://wwwcirillofamily.blogspot.com/

    BFP#1 12/23/11 EDD 8/29/12. Frank P. Cirillo IV born on 8/19/12 at 2:34am. Grew his wings and went to heaven on 8/25/12.
    My sweet angel Frankie. Love you so much!

    BFP #2 5/21/13 EDD 1/25/14 Sam Frank P. born 1/17/14 Our rainbow baby is here!!

    January 2015 PAL- Advice image




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