NBR Crazy FIL
namara5532
member
I don't feel right ranting about this to my own family, so I figured I'd rant about it to y'all.
So FIL is known for his demeaning tantrums. When we were planning for our wedding, we sent out paper invitations to the first batch of invitees. We got married at the Renaissance Festival, so basically anyone who wanted to come was invited. FIL threw a fit that his wife's children didn't get sent a paper invitation even though we told him they were welcome to come. He declared that he wasn't coming if they didn't get mailed invitations. He eventually came around, but this is the kind of guy he is. He guilt trips people to get them to do what he wants.
This morning, he sends a mass text to me, DH, and his wife's kids asking for help to move that day. He basically said that we should help him because he's helped all of us in so many ways. First of all, he gave us no indication that he needed help moving (in fact, he gave the impression he hired movers). Second, both of DH's stepsisters have small children as do we. We're 2 hours away, and the stepsisters are at least an hour away. Third, we already had plans for today. If he'd asked us a week ago, we might have considered it. But DH is livid that he's trying to get us to do what he wants by guilting us into it, and he's resisting the urge to call him and start a fight about it.
One of the stepsisters sent a reply (which we got because she hit reply all) telling him that her husband is coming but will be ditching on his son's tball game to do so. She pointed out that she didn't want her kids being in the way of the movers and was dealing with a sick kid, so calling to see if he needed help moving didn't cross her mind. She called him out on that he didn't actually ask for help; he laid out an ultimatum that he expected us to help him based on how he's helped us in various ways in the past. DH called his sister to let her know what was going on (she lives too far away for him to expect her to help move apparently), and during the conversation he texted her looking for sympathy. It was along the lines of "Everyone's mad at me and noone wants to help their 60 year old dad who needs hip surgery move his stuff." I'm glad she's aware of the situation because he was obviously not going to tell her the whole story so she'd give him sympathy.
We're planning on seeing him for Thanksgiving. Although this situation will have a month to cool down, it could still be pretty interesting, especially since we're having it at one of DH's stepsisters' house. If FIL continues to be a drama queen, I wouldn't be surprised if he decided he wasn't coming. We're sorta ok with that though. He's prone to throw a tantrum even in the best of times.
Re: NBR Crazy FIL
Baby 2 EDD 7-18-14
Oh my goodness, what unnecessary stress you have to deal with. That sucks, I"m sorry! I totally get your frustration. I have crazy IL's too. From what I hear you'd think your FIL is a woman
My FIL also likes to point out the things he does for everyone! If you are genuinely willing to help, it's not something you should be bringing up. If somebody needs help, don't ask for a payback, that is so the opposite of what HELP should be.