14 month old won't nap without being latched
mrsmonak
member
Hey ladies! I've never posted on this board before. I wasn't sure where to post this issue, but I thought some of you fellow attachment parents might relate a little better perhaps.
I am nearly 8 weeks pregnant with my second, and still nursing my 14 month old son. I am not in a hurry to wean him, but I do wish I could find a way to sort out some issues. The biggest being that he will not nap without being latched anymore. Besides the obvious reason that I'd really love to get some things done while he naps (or nap myself, since I'm exhausted from parenting and pregnancy), it's a problem because my nipples are sore right now from pregnancy, and it hurts the whole time he's on me. He's not biting, it's just tender. So I definitely can't nap while he's napping. I just sit there in pain, surfing the internet on my tablet until he's done with this nap.
If I try to unlatch him, he screams and roots around until he finds me again. On the rare occasion that I can unlatch him, he doesn't usually stay like that for more than 10 minutes, and he will not stay asleep if I try and put him down. He'll either scream in his crib or wake up for good and play, skipping his nap. I wish he would take a pacifier, but he won't. Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can stop this? I'm not sure if the only thing I can do is stop nursing him before naps, but he is so wired and wild all the time, it's the only thing that seems to calm him down. He's never once "crashed" from playing or whatever like I seem to see most babies doing. He's so active, and it's like his mind never shuts off.
P.S. We don't co-sleep (obviously besides his naps, but not by choice). But he does sleep in his crib for bedtime. He still wakes up several times a night, but I suppose that's another issue. Help please! Thanks! =]
Re: 14 month old won't nap without being latched
I don't really have any advice since I nurse my LO during both of his naps and on and off all night long. I can unlatch him and usually get out of bed without waking him, but if I'm not there with him, his naps are much much shorter. I either take a nap with him or use the iPad and bump or send emails during his naps. Most housework is done while he plays, and he just watches and follows me around.
I am interested in others' recommendations because we plan to start TTC in 6 months or so, and I will need to adjust our way of doing things then! Good luck to you!
DS1 took 2 naps until about 18 months and I nursed him to sleep and for naps. In one of the sleep books, they suggested having 2-3 methods that will help LO sleep so they don't have such a strong sleep association. So I nursed, drove LO in the car and just rocked and held LO to sleep.
I would plan our day so we had an outing in the morning and drive home at nap time. Luckily DS1 would transfer well. But he had to be asleep for at least 5 min and not more than 20. Otherwise he would be up. Once he was down to one nap, life was much easier.
At night, I would nurse him and lay next to him and then get up. He also latched a lot and nursed all night. So I had to do the Pantley pull off. I would wait until he was almost asleep and then pull out. Obviously he would wake up. I'd stick my boob back in and then wait until he was asleep for a minute, then pull out. I'd do this until he finally was so tired, would not wake up when I pulled out. It would take about 15-20 minutes but it worked. Sometimes he would wake up and I would have to do this all over again, but it usually was a much faster process.
As for sore nipples, I had the same prob. I was pregnant while nursing too and I just used Lanolin after each time I nursed and it helped. I also developed mastitis and had to get antibiotics.
I hope some of this helps! GL!
I don't know if this will help, but I started nannying for lady who had a similar problem. The LO wouldn't nap unless nursing or being bottle feed. She said if I could get her to nap in the crib to go for it.
This is what I tried, and it took a few weeks to a month or so.
We stopped letting her feed her self to sleep. She would have a bottle of breast milk but, if she started to drift off, out it came and into the the crib she went.
I would then read her a story or two (I would also read the same two stories every day). After the story I would say, Please lay down, it is nap time. I love you. and walked out of the room.
I would stay just out side the door and for the first 30 mins would come in every ten minutes and repeat the same thing and rub her back for a moment to help calm her.
After the 30 minutes I would start coming in every 15 mins, but standing in the door way, and say "Please lay down, It is nap time. I love you". Close the door and leave.
If she wasn't asleep in an hour and a half she was done with nap time. It was horrible until she learned that this is how naps where going to be. The mother was supportive, and listening to her cry always broke my heart.
Now she a year later she puts herself down for her nap, with a simple "Alright girls, it's nap time!'
I really hope that helps. Good luck!