Moms of 2+ with SO who works evenings

erin922

How do you do bedtime???  DH started his new shift of 4-12 today and I was prepared for it to be hectic with a 3 week old and 2 1/2 year old, but tonight was disastrous! Of course tonight was the night that DS decided to not nap then got so overtired that he screamed for 2 hours all while trying to give DD attention and get her to bed.  I tried wearing him and he just screamed more, tried swaddling, 5 S's, feeding, swing, bouncer, pacifier...everything to get him down so I could focus on DD.  Do you just assume that your older one's routines go out the window even if it means bedtime ends up being almost an hour later? How do you do it??

marhar7106

I am a mom of 3. Dh has a schedule that alternates between days and nights. When he's on nights he works 6pm-6am. He's on his 4th of 4 nights right now. It can get pretty crazy, but luckily bedtime usually goes pretty smoothly. I bring all 3 girls upstairs around 7-7:30 and we brush teeth, read books, then I tuck dd#2 in, talk with dd#1 and tuck her in, then I take dd#3 downstairs and get her fed and ready to go to sleep. It has been working out pretty well so far. I have a 3 year old, a 17 month old, and a 6 week old. Just hang in there. You have to be flexible and let go of an exact bed time because it doesn't always work out, but you'll get used to it and so will your little ones.

byrne15

DH is gone 1PM - 10:30PM or later.  Bedtime is really tough.  However, it is starting to get better.  DS#2 is really fussy (especially between 6PM and 9PM).  Doing bedtime together for the 2 boys is basically impossible.

I will give ds#1 and #2 a bath together.  I take #2 out first and dress him in the bathroom while ds#1 plays a little longer in the bathtub.  Then, ds#2 sits in the bouncer while I take out #1 and dress him.  We will then go back downstairs and I will put #2 in the swing and try to get him to sleep (which can take up to an hour).  Ds#1 is usually playing his leapster or watching a show/playing during this time since #2 takes all my attention at this time.  Once he falls asleep, then I can continue on with ds#1's bedtime routine.  I just bring up the monitor to ds#1's room so I can hear if #2 wakes up.

I hope eventually I can do "bedtime" with both of them together, but I think ds #2 just needs to get older and grow out of the fussiness.

erbear

I put my toddler to bed first for a while. It was hard for a few months but it gets easier.

Steph Bez

I try to keep my (DS) toddler on routine, I find that helps keep it to only one fussy child instead of 2. If my DD is fussy, I'll put her in her vibrating chair or crib under mobile and let her cry for a min while I brush his teeth and get his pjs on. Then I'll soothe her for a min then go on with his routine (which is just a few sips of milk, saying goodnight to the dog, baby, lights, then into bed. I still have him in his crib since he sleeps so well in it, he's 22 months old). Then once I get him down I take her downstairs and give her a bottle then put her down drowsy but awake. I find having her not stay awake for more than an hr at that age helped a lot, now she's 3 months old and she stays up for about 1.5-2 hrs at a time. Good luck, my DH works steady 3-11 but once you get them both near the same bedtime you'll have your nights back to have a glass of wine and watch girlie shows which is my goal haha!

libra31

My husband travels so I'm by myself some in the evenings with 4.  I'm not going to lie it's very challenging and bedtime with my 2 boys (4.5, 2.5) in the same room can be a nightmare.  Top that with an extremely fussy 2 month old who is only calmed by nursing and won't go to bed until 10 or later.  I feel your pain!

My advise to you is to get done as much as possible ahead of time.  Have your toddlers dinner prepped and the mess cleaned up, switch her bath to the am if it's in the evening, change her into her pajamas whenever baby is giving you a break. Make her bedtime routine simple...brush teeth, read one book, bed.  And it's not the end of the world if your baby has to cry in a safe place in another room while you accomplish this.  Good Luck!

hmp1

My dh is traveling this week so I am doing bedtime alone. Only 2 nights in but both have worked well. I do an easy crock pot dinner so I don't spend much time cooking. I nurse the baby while we eat to make sure I can have an hour after dinner with DS. I take both boys upstairs, have ds help me change the baby's diaper, swaddle, paci and put him down in his crib with the sound machine on. I then do ds's bedtime routine: bath, pjs, book, bed. I have had enough time to clean the kitchen and do some other things before the baby wakes to eat again.