Question for STMs Re: Siblings and new baby

Jimsgirl5821

Hello everyone, coming over from 3rd tri with a question...How are your LO's dealing with the new baby? I am due on 10/27 and have a 3 y/o DD at home. Lately, she has become very clingy (always following me around the house, wanting me to feed her, etc.), but also has been testing boundaries and being defiant as well (not listening to me, throwing things, tantrums). I think it has to do with the impending invasion of a new baby Anyone having issues with their LO's behavior and how do you handle it? I want to be sympathic to her feelings and not punish her if she's doing it out of concern over her place in the family, but I dont want to let bad behavior slide, either.

Thanks and congrats on all of your babies!! I lurked a bit and I love all the pics!

LittleApple

The first two weeks with the new baby home are sheer hell with the older kid.  It does get better after that.

rpt06

My DD is also 3 and she's been great so far! (DS is 3.5 weeks)  I found a little while before I was due she was starting to act out a bit and we nipped that before DS was born and haven't had any issues since.  I'm sure she'll have her moments but so far so good

kelbel527

That sounds exactly how DS was before DS2 arrived.  We punished him as necessary but also tried to give him a lot of extra love and attention. I tried to spend more time with him at night (instead of DH), knowing that DH would have to take over a lot once the baby was here.

Since DS2 has arrived, he is still acting up a bit (trouble listening and more than normal potty-accidents), but he LOVES his baby brother.  He's obviously feeling like he's getting a little less attention, but he never takes it out on the baby.  He wants to hold him, hug him and kiss him all the time. 

The best thing I'm trying to do right now is still set aside time with him.  It's hard when DS2 wants to nurse during dinner, or bathtime or bedtime...then I have to send DH to do it.  But I'm trying to find that extra time with him.  Kids are resiliant though and I'm sure your DD will do great!

jtwin1

My DS1 is awesome with his brother, he is always asking about him, and he is very good with him. He has started acting up a bit, but I think it might be more age related then sibling related. He turned 3 a few weeks after DS2 was born.

When I took him for his 3yr check up I mentioned about the tantrums and the doctor commented how 3's are tougher than 2's.

 

Jimsgirl5821

Thanks so much ladies! DD is excited about the baby. She hasn't said anything negative about having a brother, even wanted to get him a gift But with the behavior lately I wasn't sure if baby-related or just the terrible 3's since the coincidence in the timing.  I will definitely make a point to do a little activity with just her everyday so she gets her special mommy time I'm sure we will have our rough spots, but good to know it passes

Thanks for the advice!

MainelyFoolish

Three year olds are obnoxious. Her behavior sounds like a typical three year old.

Jimsgirl5821

MainelyFoolish:

Three year olds are obnoxious. Her behavior sounds like a typical three year old.

Thank you for saying this! I of course love DD to death but she's been on my nerves some days lately. I was afraid I'd get the side eye for saying it though  

rnbeth477

DS is 21 months. It's only been a few days since DD has been home, but he has been great. He seems a bit indifferent so far. He's more interested in her gear like rnp and carrier. We have not seen any acting out, but I've been sure to give him some mommy time too throughout the day.