Special BD activity with one child; leaving older sibling home??
Suern9870
member
My middle DD will be 4 on Monday. I also have a 5.5 yr old DD and a 5 month old DS. My 5 month old has a DR appt Monday AM, so my in laws will pick up my older 2 at school and come to my house.
As I mentioned, Monday is also DD's birthday. I mentioned to MIL I may plan on taking her out for her birthday to a kids nail salon in the afternoon. I haven't had much 1 on 1 time with her since my son was born in May and I know she'd love to have her nails done.
When I mentioned this to my MIL, she said, "well why don't you bring DD1, as well?" It seemed as though she thought it would be mean to leave the older one out. I wasn't inclined to include her because I would like to have time alone with the birthday girl; my older daughter will be fine with her grandparents in the afternoon. If she mentions she'd like to go, I can make plans to take her another day. What do you think? Is that weird?
Re: Special BD activity with one child; leaving older sibling home??
I started a tradition with the kids I nanny when the oldest turned 5 of taking them out for a special birthday treat. Mom and dad have really hectic schedules, so even though they definitely do a lot for the girls, sometimes they seemed put out that all they did for their birthday was have cupcakes for dessert after dinner. (They have huge family parties, as well, but they have huge family parties a lot so it's not like a birthday party to them) I've always stood by "It's ____ birthday, so today is their turn. When it's your birthday, we will go do something fun that you want to do!" (it helped to tell her to start thinking about what she wanted to do on her special day so we had lots of ideas to choose from). It's one of the few things they no longer argue about, and they definitely look forward to having a day where they get some one on one attention. This year was the first year I started doing a special day with the youngest (3 sisters, she's 3 now), and she will bring up every few weeks how much fun we're going to have on her birthday this year because she has lots of good ideas for next time.
I don't think it's mean at all because it isn't really "leaving the older one out", it's laying the foundation for an awesome bonding time birthday tradition that you can continue pretty much all their lives if you so choose!
Thank you. That's exactly what I wanted to hear
No, I think everyone should feel special on your birthday if your 4 or 104.