Anyone switch from DC to Nanny?
Hi all-
My daughter is nearly 2 and has been in DC since she was 4 months. She has pretty much always loved it and we rarely have issues with drop off, etc. She has been a little hesitant to go for the past month after we went on a two week vaca but teachers say she is great during the day. However, after recently dealing with a few very difficult drop offs and considering we have #2 on the way, we have been thinking about a nanny more and more.
Has anyone ever moved from DC to a nanny? While the convenience and less frequent sickness would be wonderful (particularly with an infant at home), I worry that she will miss the socialization/activity/routine. Sure, I would put her in an activity or two, but two hours a week of social time is far different than 40.
Thanks!
Re: Anyone switch from DC to Nanny?
As a nanny (and former daycare worker) I never thought I'd say this, but with an older child I'd absolutely stick with DC if those were my options.
Ideally (if I were in the situation), if the DC had a morning nursery school program, and it was affordable to do so, I'd keep baby home with nanny and send DD to the morning program a few days a week, especially if she's always gone to school, just to keep the socialization and routine in place, and have nanny pick her up to spend the rest of the day at home. I'm currently dealing with trying to transition the youngest of my nanny family to going to school and it's been an awful transition thus far because she is so out of her element and there's been a handful of less than helpful factors at home.
I know before she started school we spent a LOT of time finding free activities to go do. I tried to join a mom's club in the town I nanny in, but was flat out told I was not a mother and not allowed to participate with their group despite explaining the situation. I did find one in my town (next town over) that was more accepting, though, and we had weekly playgroups from the time she was about 6 months until just this past summer. We also used the local libraries a lot for storytime and craft activities, sometimes they have magicians or musicians come in, and Stonyfield yogurt actually is manufactured in my hometown, and their visitor's center does a storytime/snacktime/craft once a week as well. When we added everything up there was definitely a lot of time with other children in there. We also did family activities with her older siblings when she was a baby, like indoor playgrounds, children's museums, the aquarium, the zoo, but having passes to all those things can cost an arm and a leg, and mean you have to be comfortable with nanny's driving skills.
Basically there's major pros and cons to each. I wouldn't change my experience with the family I'm with currently despite our current issues for anything in the world, but if it were my children, especially come nursery school age (3), the school aspect would be important to me, personally.
This is going to be long! We switched and for us, it's the only way we can make things work. DESPITE the fact that we have issues with our current nanny, I would do it again in a second. It takes a huge amount of stress off of me and saves me a lot of time. But, I know that everyone' situation is very different. This is what works for us and I will share in case it helps.
We switched in a similar situation to you. DD was 22 months when her little brother was born. We had a really bad time with sickness (abnormally bad) and didn't want to go through that again with newborn in the house during cold/flu season. We were lucky to have a WONDERFUL nanny who used to work at the daycare but had left to go to nursing school. She is awesome and still comes once every couple weeks.
Having a nanny is HUGE for us in terms of not having to pack lunches, get kids ready in the a.m., and to deal with changing schedules. My DH works long hours much of the year, so usually ANY time I had an evening event (frequent in fall), wanted to run an errand, or wanted to do anything social, I'd have to arrange for Grandma to pick up DD at daycare, or I'd be out of luck. Plus, I could hardly make pick-up even if I left at 5:00 on the dot due to my commute, and that was stressful every day as I often was leaving things undone at work. And, the illness thing was HUGE for us. Now, the nanny can work hours that work for us--9 to 6--and I can ask her to stay longer on occasion if need be. She can also come if the kids just have a mild fever/mild cold or whatever (plus, we have hardly had anything bad even come up at all since leaving daycare). SO much less stressful. Also, she can do the kid laundry and towels and that sort of thing, and be around for repair people; maybe start the crock pot. With DH's schedule, this is a giant load off of me, who otherwise would be juggling everything.
With our first nanny, we had a wonderful set-up. I didn't feel DD was "missing out" on anything not being in daycare anymore, and it was great having the kids at home. They would also do outings with the nanny. After she got out of school and got a real nursing job, we had to hire someone new. It's been...OK...there are a lot more issues and we are about to make another transition. So, a lot depends on who you can find. For the first few months, I really don't think they need to get out much, but after that your older child will want to do things outside of the home, so you need to find someone who you trust to do outings. That's an important thing and is one of our major issues with our current set-up.
In addition to the time/stress savings, I like the amount of time my kids get to spend together. At daycare, they would be in separate rooms all day. I also really like that they can spend a lot of time outside, especially in good weather, and I think they eat a more varied diet since it's easier to do leftovers or creative things/fresh things at home than in a packed lunch (at least for me! Not a great lunch packer and always rushing). When they can do outings, I like that they get to go out to different places in the community, and not just be stuck in the daycare room. Also, we used to pay for a lot of days we didn't use at daycare, and we now have more flexibility due to the arrangement we made with our nanny.
DD now goes to preschool 2 mornings/week and I certainly didn't feel she was at all socially "behind" or anything from her year-and-a-half at home.
Thank you both so much! You have each mirrored my concerns and considerations of making the switch. I didn't think this decision would be so difficult. The main reason we would pull her out is the sickness factor with a newborn at home. We had a horrible time with her and, in fact, she has an appointment with an immunologist to make sure she is actually not deficient. With the amount that she was sick, we have that concern. I am a horrible ball of stress when she is sick and it obviously is hard on us parents when we have to juggle work and a child that can't be at daycare.
Ultimately I want to do what is best for my kids, but I also have to consider the fact that my husband travels, I work full time, and we have no family closer than 4 hours away to help us out. It just makes me feel selfish when my main factor for a nanny is to make my life easier.
But, i really appreciate each response. It is helpful.
We made the switch last year when our older son was 2y 9m and our younger son was a baby. It simply turned out that our daycare was not a great preschool. Our baby didn't really care either way (he was only 7 months) so we pulled both kids. Our older son goes to a wonderful nursery school and he's being well prepared for kindergarten and our younger son (now 19 months) is in playgroups and a drop-off class at the Y a few hours a week. Our nanny drives, which is a awesome, but she also empties the dishwasher, does the kids' laundry, keeps the toys organized and the kids' rooms tidy and grocery shopping... all for basically the same cost as 2 kids in daycare.
The kids love her and b/c she does all that housework stuff, I get to enjoy my kids when I get home from work. There are some small annoying things, but we made a "nanny agreement" when she started working for us so things like hours, vacations, sick days... all those are clear. We ask her to text us any questions, issues throughout the day so we've developed open communication.
I used sittercity.com to find her -- post an ad, be specific and interview people over the phone before bringing your 'finalists' to your home.
Re: sickness... with a nanny, you don't have to miss work.