Regression after LO starts pre-school?

malcivar

For those of you who've gone from EI ABA to non-ABA pre-school, is it normal for LO to go through a sort of 'regression'?

Chris has gone back suddenly to throwing toys instead of playing with them.  I mentioned in a previous post that when we had Open School night, he was hopping around the room. What I didn't mention is that the whole time he was throwing Legos and anything else he could get his hands on around the room.  The teacher even made a joke to everyone "watch your heads" as soon as he'd pick something up.  It wasn't ill intentioned - I think he was just trying to make us feel less mortified.  And someone else mentioned something about him being a major league pitcher.  Everyone was trying to be nice but I was just getting more and more concerned.  The throwing hasn't been this bad in a long time. 

Then there's the matter of his eye-contact.  I honestly feel he was doing better than he is now.  We mentioned the eye-contact concern to the teacher and he did seem a little concerned but didn't make a big deal of it.  He just said that as the program continues, these things would get better but I'm just afraid that we'll "wait and see" and he'll go backwards instead of forwards.  He (teacher) did say that it's normal for it to be 2 steps forward, 5 steps back but I'm a worrier.  

It's also that I think the gap (social gap) between him and his peers is getting wider and wider - at least to me.  DH, who is usually the one with higher expectations, thinks he's doing great and that I shouldn't obsess over this.

I don't know.  Have any of you noticed any regressive type behaviors in your little ones once they started pre-school or went from ABA to non-ABA?

Thanks 

malcivar

-auntie-:

Eye contact is a sort of controversial topic in the autism community. Most high functioning adults complain about being forced into something that is uncomfortable to painful for them. I find a lot of kids on spectrum, especially the bright/more aware kiddos, have more difficulty with this rather than less as they get older and more self concious. I only ever address is as a communication feedback devise expected by others.

Two steps forward, and one step back is acceptable. Five steps back isn't. Could he just be testing the rules at school or is his behavior more disordered than it's been across all venues?

I'm sure the gap is greater now. And it's going to get even bigger. Autism is a developmental delay in the areas of social, emotional and adaptive skills. A bright kid with a PDD-Nos dx will typically have the emotional and social tools of a child about half his age. A Vineland and BASC can help confirm this. Since the delay is expressed as a percentage, you can expect it to widen as he gets older. I know despite my son's 4.0 GPA that he has the social and emotional maturity of a high school freshman rather than a college one.

This was really hard for me to accept on a gut level. I mean, DS got lots of world class therapy and worked really hard to be his best self and yet his typically developin peers routinely blow his doors off with skills they seemingly pick up through osmosis. It's frustrating.

Take 2 - apparently the 1st reply didn't make it through.

I can tell you that I agree with you on the eye contact thing.  I'm "NT" but I am HORRIBLE with eye contact.  I've even had people point it out that it seems like I'm being less than sincere because I don't make eye contact.  I end up forcing myself (and it really is forcing myself) to do it when I'm having a work conversation or a heart to heart with DH but I do feel as though I'm missing part of the conversation because I'm concentrating so much on the eye contact.  I don't know what it is about it that makes me so uncomfortable.  So I know it's a red flag for evals and school and such but personally I don't feel that strongly about it.  

Also confusing is that I'm not sure how much of his behavior is a regression or just toddler/pre-school-ness.  How much is him just testing us and how much should I be worried about.  I don't want to obsess about everything but I don't want to overlook something that maybe I should be looking at.  Ah!!!!

I know the gap will get bigger w/ his NT peers but what concerned me more was his class peers.  That night the ones that were there were playing quietly at one of the tables but Chris was the only one hopping around everywhere.  However, his teacher did say that academically, he blows the doors off (love that expression) all the the kids in the class and that he would probably be moved to a "better" class next year.  And I'm thinking "better?  how does that work if it seems like socially he isn't doing as well as the others?  or am I not looking at the right things?"

Thank you for the suggestions.  I'll speak to his teacher and the school psychologist about looking into these just if nothing else to put my mind at ease.  

My sister is like your son - a bit - she's very intelligent and did audit one university course and got an A.  It was a requirement for her job but she opted not to try for anything more as it was way too stressful for her.  Even though my mom hasn't shared any recent evaluations - or if there have even been any since she's an adult - but I'd swear she has the emotional maturity of a teenager - and we're both 38 (we're twins).  

As always - thanks so much for your help!