IEP meeting without parents?

bparkhur

My son just started an ese preschool program this year (he is 3). We received a note in his communication book that his IEP was going to be reevaluated the next day. My husband and I both work, so there was no way that we could go to the meeting even though we both would have arranged to be there if given more time.

 I am college professor and received a call from the teacher and coordinator at the time of the meeting between my classes asking if I could "be there" on the phone. I obviously couldn't since I was about to go into a new class. My husband is a restaurant manager and tried his best to be at work and on the phone when they called him.

Overall, I am extremely disappointed with the way this process worked out. I appreciate that my husband tried his best to take notes and ask questions, but it's hard to think of everything you want to ask or what you need to know when you are asked to join an impromptu meeting in the middle of work! And what about MY concerns? I feel frustrated and left out, but I'm worried that the teacher may find it insulting if I ask for another meeting right away (I did mention to them when they called that I wanted to be there and need more time to arrange it because I work...they apologized, but obviously didn't feel inclined to postpone the meeting).

What do I do? I want to be an advocate for my son but make sure I maintain a good relationship with the people who have such a heavy hand in is care. Is this common practice? I would think these meetings would be scheduled WAY in advance to ensure parental involvement.

Thanks for listening!

JenGK

As PP said, take a look at the parental rights book they gave you.  They tried to do this to me with my son's first IEP -- I got a notice that the meeting was the next day.  I called up the secretary, told her that the regs require I be given X many days notice, and that the meeting therefore could not go forward the following day.  You can still maintain a good relationship even if you disagree with what they are doing.  Be straightforward but firm with them, and emphasize how you want to be part of the team.  The team for my son knows that I know the regs, and that I am involved, and this has never happened again.

macchiatto

What?! I'd be really disappointed in how that was handled. I remember waiving my 10-days' notice but only because my son's 3rd birthday was right after Christmas and with him getting into EI late, the school system eval process was rushed and we had to schedule the meeting on shorter notice. My husband and I were both there though; I would've been uncomfortable doing it over the phone unless like pp said, it was very minor changes and we'd been in the process at all. I'd definitely schedule another meeting for a time that's doable for you.

MaxandRuby

You should have gotten a notice of proceduarl safeguards and an invitation to the meeting. The IEP meeting is supposed to be held at a time that is mutually agreed on by all parties so if you and your husband were not available on the day and at the time the meeting was held, you would have requested a different day/time.

Call a 2nd meeting. The IEP does not start until you or your husband has signed it. It is a legal document so don't take it lightly and make sure ALL of your questions are answered to your satisfaction. 

bparkhur

Thank you so much to everyone who replied! Part of my problem is that I don't really know what my and my son's rights are. Aunti--I purchased one of the books you recommended and look forward to reading it! I'm going to contact the program coordinator tomorrow to see when a new meeting can be set up. Thanks agaiN!