I think I should quit my job

andyyougoonie

My coworker has been here for like 5 months.  She was offerred another job for more money and her last day is tomorrow.  Here is the list of shenanigans to celebrate her last days:

--everyone pitching in on a gift
--celebratory lunch tomorrow, everyone pitching in to pay for her food
--celebratory breakfast today, my boss brought a huge spread
--they passed out company stationary for each individual in our dept to write her a personalized note thanking her for her time here
--everyone is BEGGING her to stay!  They made her cry at lunch the other day because they won't let it go.  She feels like sh?t but this is what's best for her family.

WTAF!  We've had other coworkers leave after years of service and all we did for them was sign a card!  This is f?cking ridiculous.

ETA: formatting

andyyougoonie

EllaHella:

Oh good grief.  Just do what I do and ignore your coworkers.  I go days without talking to some people, even when I see them. 

They don't pay me to get along with those clowns.

I couldn't agree more.  At my last job, I worked from home half the week and pretty much everyone worked from home for at least part of the week.  No one ever talked to anyone, except via email.  It was wonderful.

andyyougoonie

mbenit4:

EllaHella:

Oh good grief.  Just do what I do and ignore your coworkers.  I go days without talking to some people, even when I see them. 

They don't pay me to get along with those clowns.

+1

I interact on an as needed basis only. I am also that person that would be like, "Joan, when John left we didn't do all this. We only signed a card." Then I sit back and watch.

I was thisclose to saying something during breakfast this morning, but I would have gotten my a$$ crawled and it's not worth it.  I seriously can't believe the huge hullaballoo surrounding this departure.  She hasn't even been here for a year, FFS!  Thank God I won't be here for tomorrow's shenanigans.

andyyougoonie

anna karenina:

Have I said congrats yet? If I haven't, congrats, Goonie!

Dear coworker:

I'm so glad you are moving on to a better opportunity.

I am not sure how you earned so much loyalty here but I am confident that BJ's an/or butt sex was involved.  

Please do not let the door hit you where the good lord split you.

xoxoxo,

Andy 

lololololololol!  Love it!  ::copies word for word onto company stationary:: 

And thank you!  I'm glad you're back!

FluxCapacitorFluxing

And yet... during her absence... it was strongly suggested that Anna Karenina is a new incarnation of Yankee... someone no one seems to miss all that much.

Weird. 

andyyougoonie

FluxCapacitorFluxing:

And yet... during her absence... it was strongly suggested that Anna Karenina is a new incarnation of Yankee... someone no one seems to miss all that much.

Weird. 

So what.  Even if they are the same person, it's totally fine to miss AK and not miss Yankee.  This is the internet - and an anonymous message board.  You can be whoever you want to be.

TunaTown

So why all the hooplah over this chick?

andyyougoonie

TunaTown:

So why all the hooplah over this chick?

I wish someone would explain it to me.  She's nice and all but she's not like the second coming or anything.  I don't get it.  They didn't go to this much trouble when I brought a new freaking life into the world!

[Deleted User]

Is it possible that she sucks so bad, they are happy she's going?  Otherwise, I'd go with Anna's suggestion.  LOL @ buttsecks.

andyyougoonie

lol I'm sure she wasn't actually giving blowies.  She is a hard worker and she actually tried to learn things, I guess.  I didn't work with her directly on anything.  I have no idea what the hooplah is about.  It's annoying.

I didn't want to write this letter thing that they want us all to do, but EVERYONE else is doing it.  So the absence of one/mine would be pretty obvious, wouldn't it?  Uggg.  Lame.

ridesbuttons

"Get well, get well soon we wish you to get well!"

EVA116

"Thank you for your 5 months of hardwork. There will be big shoes to fill here...hopefully they will be a size 6 months."