Need to vent

cislebride07

Is it just me or does it drive you crazy when people say "you should feel lucky that you were able to have one healthy child?"  I totally love DS but I want more Children and I deserve that.  Sorry. Just trying to deal with the news of IVF, pregnancy announcement from a friend And a mother who seems to lack sympathy in this whole situation.

AprilDrew04

Hang in there.  We all get that one and it is said by those who just can not understand what we are going through.  For me it was said by my "baby" sister (she's 26).  She has been having sex unprotected with her boyfriend, who she breaks up with every few months, since they first met 5 years ago.  She has not ended up pregnant and thinks that I am being selfish for wanting more children.  

As someone said before - if I didn't have IF and wanted more children I wouldn't be seen as selfish (unless you are octomom), but because I am struggling then I am selfish?  Thankfully we have each other. 

74dragonfly

We are all entitled to want the family of our dreams. There is nothing wrong with that. I have heard that "be happy you have a child" line too. It is annoying.

SigmundsGirl

I totally understand. For me, I try to consider the source. If it is someone who has never struggled with IF, then I get pretty pi$$ed. If it is coming from my SIL who has learned she will never have kids, I acknowledge how lucky we are, and then I let it go knowing that we have every right to want another.

IF is hard and it is even harder when your support system isn't very supportive.

We are here for you and understand what you are going through.

cislebride07

I am really thankful to have found you all on this board. I really appreciate all your support. I knew I could come here thank you.

suzie711

AprilDrew04:

 

As someone said before - if I didn't have IF and wanted more children I wouldn't be seen as selfish (unless you are octomom), but because I am struggling then I am selfish?  Thankfully we have each other. 

This  ^^ .. DH actually said this same thing to me this morning... even he doesnt get it He wants a second child, but thinks that I shouldn't be *jealous* or sad when other people have children .... SIGH .. IF sucks

cislebride07

suzie711:

AprilDrew04:

 

As someone said before - if I didn't have IF and wanted more children I wouldn't be seen as selfish (unless you are octomom), but because I am struggling then I am selfish?  Thankfully we have each other. 

This  ^^ .. DH actually said this same thing to me this morning... even he doesnt get it He wants a second child, but thinks that I shouldn't be *jealous* or sad when other people have children .... SIGH .. IF sucks

My husband is exactly the same. We had this conversation like just last night. Turned into an argument. No one seems to get it

LaineyPaney

Lots of people just don't get it...

I've found that, "well, maybe I should, but I don't" shuts people up. It doesn't make me feel better, but it shuts them up.