Diagnose me...Mentally...

startingover10423

I have anxiety attacks. When I have them, my brain tells me to clean everything. Nothing can make me stop. I get VERY agitated and have to clean, even if it's already clean. It's not like I hear voices, but I just think of all the things that need cleaning. I cannot make my brain slow down. I have to get this taken care of. I went to a doctor yesterday, and he told me he's not going to give me anything. He gave me a referral for a psychiatrist and a psychologist. He told me that he thinks I'm bi-polar, and that I should eat a gluten-free, wheat-free diet. I do not think I'm bi-polar. I have never had an episode where I didn't feel like I need sleep. Ever. What do you ladies think?

SLO2005

ummmm.... he diagnosed you biploar because you have anxiety?  WTF?  Go to a psychiatrist he/she will be more useful!!

Yules

This sounds like OCD to me. Love how wheat gets blamed for everything now. "anxious? Angry? Sad? Don't eat bread!!!!" 

That said. I gets bouts of tidying when I'm over the top angry, but cant formulate my thoughts cohesively enough to vocalize my anger.  My kitchen ended up so spotless last night that I took photos of it. 

startingover10423

Thanks, Ladies...my psych appointment is next Friday. He wouldn't get me anything to get me through until then...I have a 2 year old, I can't be irritated with all this little stuff. I know it's not normal, not healthy. I don't want my son to see me as an angry person. What am I supposed to do until Friday. Thinking of going to Urgent Care. I can't to this anymore.

Smootchy

Slightly kidding, I see nothing wrong. Sorta jealous and wish you'd come to my house.

More seriously, I'm almost impressed your doctor didn't just throw Xanax at you, as in my opinion most doctors would. Maybe he sees something a little more which is why he's thinking bipolar. I don't think going to see his referral could hurt you at all, so although I can't diagnose you, would bet a good psychologist would. Psychologist/ psychologist whom ever can listen to you AND write a script if needed
I don't know enough about disorders to talk about them, but if I HAD to diagnose you, it seems more OCD than bipolar.

startingover10423

From what I've been reading, I may have borderline personality disorder, but what am I supposed to do until my psych appointment?? That doctor made me mad yesterday. My DH found me in the corner, crying, last night, because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't make my brain slow down. I was cleaning a closet and the sliding door came out of the track. I wanted to throw it. I actually thought I could. Instead, I sat down, halfway in the closet, and cried. DH just held me, and I went and took an Ativan. I hate taking those, because they make me zone out.

Smootchy

startingover10423:

Thanks, Ladies...my psych appointment is next Friday. He wouldn't get me anything to get me through until then...I have a 2 year old, I can't be irritated with all this little stuff. I know it's not normal, not healthy. I don't want my son to see me as an angry person. What am I supposed to do until Friday. Thinking of going to Urgent Care. I can't to this anymore.

Whoa. If you're to this point, I sorta think your doctor sucks for not giving you something to take the edge off. I'm very sorry!
Have you ever taken any medication before that helped? If I were you, I'd ask my mom to take the kids and call a friend for a Xanax.
ETA: I would never tell someone not to get help they felt they needed but I don't see Urgent Care or even ER helping. I think, not sure, but think they would either discharge you and tell you to see doctor ASAP OR possibly take you to psyc ward obv not in urgent care
Hope DH is supportive. Try to just relax. Can you maybe get out to see a movie or something? Sorry if that's a dumb suggestion or wouldn't help at all... Just trying to think of something to do where you mind doesn't have to work

TheBuddha

Since your doc didn't give you anything to take the edge off you're going to have to reach deep down and do some deep breathing, muscle relaxing exercises. This is how I try to manage my anxiety, and crazy cleaning is one of my biggest problems so I totally empathize with you.

Tighten specific muscles and hold for 15 seconds. Then exhale and release the muscle. Start at your neck and work down to your toes. Do this on your couch or living room floor while you put on a tv show for your 2 year old.

You can make it until your appt. You can do this.

tarebear9891

I'm also not a doctor but I have an uncle who has bipolar disorder. What you are describing sounds like periods of mania. If you start to feel like you are at your breaking point, you definitely can and should check yourself into the hospital. You can put yourself in a temporary psych hold so they can help you get stabilized. I'm not saying you are there, I'm just saying there is no shame in that if you need too.

Also I'm glad your doctor referred you to the right person to get you help. And good job for you realizing you do need help.

nancy30005

startingover10423:

From what I've been reading, I may have borderline personality disorder, but what am I supposed to do until my psych appointment?? That doctor made me mad yesterday. My DH found me in the corner, crying, last night, because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't make my brain slow down. I was cleaning a closet and the sliding door came out of the track. I wanted to throw it. I actually thought I could. Instead, I sat down, halfway in the closet, and cried. DH just held me, and I went and took an Ativan. I hate taking those, because they make me zone out.

How old is your LO?
I felt very similar to what you're describing (and never did before being a mom) and I went to my doctor. My kid was probably 6 months old and I was losing my shiz.
No sleep. Cleaning everything. And angry as hel1.
Turns out it was a thyroid issue (l have anxiety as well, but this pushed it over the edge) and they adjusted my synthroid and I was much better. 
It's worth a shot. Depending on your history, you could be chemically subjected to many things. Not a biggie, just ask them to check. I wish I could help you, but for now, hang in there (sounds like your DH is great) and meditate. Try anything. Friday will be here soon. 
Many, many hugs. 

mejane123

-auntie-:

Your doc gets kudos from me for referring you to experts- a psycholgist and psychiatrist are the go-to clinicians to diagnose and treat this or some other behavioral health disorder. But he gets the serious side-eye from me for the gluten-free b/s. Seriously, wtf?

DH and I were just talking about how Drs tend to throw meds at situations like this as bandaids, so I definitely agree with this.  I know it doesn't help your immediate needs, but by acknowledging that he isn't a pro in the psych field makes your Dr seem like a halfway decent one.  I don't really get the gluten-free, though.  Am I missing something?  Have you researched that one at all?  Because I'm at a loss.

It sounds like you have a very supportive DH, which is awesome, and it seems like you have your logical hat on when it comes to your LO, which is even better.  Your appointment is less than a week away, and PPs have offered some great suggestions for relaxing, definitely give those a shot.  Do you have any type of comfort zone you can slip into, like a favorite movie or book?  

Best of luck to you, I went through this type of behavior when I was weaned off of a medication a few years ago, so I know how awful it feels.  Fortunately, it went away for the most part, but while it was happening, I felt like I was going insane, literally, like I needed to crawl out of my skin and just run.  I hope you get this worked out, and hopefully the psychiatrist will give you exactly what you need.

Just a thought, could you maybe call first thing Monday morning and ask to be put on a cancellation list, in case something opens up sooner?

flyingsaucer

If you feel like you can't make it until next Fri, please call a local counseling center or psychiatric hospital TOMORROW.  There are doctors that will see you out patient ASAP

nanabanana06

It could be a mix of things. The anxiety and cleaning thing sounds like OCD. My DH has OCD. His is anxiety and compulsions with germs. So when he has anxiety or anything it results in him sanitizing his desk. We live by very specific rules in the house to not set off his anxiety. The other bits could be related to the anxiety or it could be a form of bipolar. Sometimes it isn't just one problem. Sometimes one problem creates another. Untreated OCD can cause you to become slightly bipolar. I would talk to a psychiatrist. Hopefully they work with you to calm the anxiety and help you set down rules for OCD. DH doesn't take any meds, they do not help him. Instead we all have to help him work through his anxiety. It sucks, but a common thing.

JumpingJudahBean

startingover10423:

From what I've been reading, I may have borderline personality disorder, but what am I supposed to do until my psych appointment?? That doctor made me mad yesterday. My DH found me in the corner, crying, last night, because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't make my brain slow down. I was cleaning a closet and the sliding door came out of the track. I wanted to throw it. I actually thought I could. Instead, I sat down, halfway in the closet, and cried. DH just held me, and I went and took an Ativan. I hate taking those, because they make me zone out.

 

Sounds like Rapid cycle bi-polar disorder to me. Hope you get the help you need.

KJmashup

Yules:

This sounds like OCD to me. Love how wheat gets blamed for everything now. "anxious? Angry? Sad? Don't eat bread!!!!" 

I agree.