Advice Question

schnena77

I am seeking advice on having 2 under 2. I underwent fertility treatment to get pregnant w/ #1 (and am currently pregnant w/ number 1). My fertility doctor wants me to come back for evaluation at 5 months after having LO w/ thought DH and I should go for #2 at 6 months after LO. My fertility doctor's reasons are primarily age I am turning 35 and DH is turning 40 this year. I just keep thinking if it is a good decision or not. Is that enough time for my body to recover after having LO? Would any of you recommend waiting a few more months - like 9 months after #1 before going for #2.

preggyamy

I'm not sure what the reasons for your infertility are, but according to my RE, a woman's fertility declines every six months.  My LO is seven months now, and I wanted to wait a year or two before having #2.  He recommended either freezing my eggs and waiting until we were ready, or having #2 ASAP.  But in your case, I don't know how much of a difference just a couple of months would make. 

 

In any case, GL!

2ktBride

I don't have advice regarding fertility struggles but I do want to make a few suggestions that will help your second pregnancy (hopefully) if you do decide to have them close together.  After you deliver #1 do your best to shed some of the baby weight and stay as active as possible.  Towards the end of your second pregnancy you'll be tired enough chasing after baby#1 and carrying around the weight of baby #2 that you don't need any extra weight or stress.  Also, surround yourself with family and/or friends that would be able to assist during your second pregnancy if you need a few hours to rest or run errands.  The second pregnancy has been much, much harder for me and I know how amazing it is to be able to get a few moments alone to recharge.

GL

jesselayne8

We decided to start trying at 6 months because of our IF history.  After my c/s, the Dr said we needed to wait a minimum of 6 months before getting pregnant.  We ended up going to see the RE again at 8 months after I got my first postpartum AF. 

 

kcisthebombdotcom

It really will depend on how good of shape you are in. I didn't gain a lot of weight with my first pregnancy, lost it quickly, and stayed active throughout so my second pregnancy wasn't that difficult. I'm sure lots of naps and regular chiropractor visits helped too though.

I think if time/fertility isn't on your side, I would try sooner vs later. I don't think 3 months is going to make some huge difference in how you'd feel. Your uterus does most of the healing by 6 weeks PP.

MammaBear81

This is more of a personal decision than a general.  A lot of things factor into when you should try for the next one.  I have age spans from 16-20 months apart, (so I got pg 6-10 months PP).  My body handled it very well, but I was also very physically fit and 24 years old when I started having children (notice the keyword WAS).  I'm pretty out of shape now (working on getting back) but I can't imagine how my body would handle things differently if I wasn't so young, or in really good shape to start with.  We didn't have any fertility issues, so I don't know what kind of wrench that throws into the mix.

If you are concerned about your body handling another pregnancy, then I'd get evaluated by your OB at 5 months PP, and then get a second opinion. just to make sure.  If you are more concerned with how you will handle 2 under 2, well that's a whole other post!  GL!

kewltif

I got pregnant again when DD was 13 months, but I wonder in a way if it actually would have been easier when she was six months, not mobile yet and taking 3 naps a day.

drpayne

No experience with the fertility issues. Our midwife kind of lectured us about needing to use BC after DS was born and said it would be bad for my body to get pregnant again too soon. It kind of irked me because we don't use BC but I chose not to get into that with her. I really believe that, generally speaking, our bodies wouldn't allow it to happen if its that big of a nono. My first pregnancy was tough physically, between PSD and sciatica. That went away immeditely after birth. I agree with PP though about weight gain. That was the hardest part of recovery for me. All of that "it falls right off when you're nursing" nonsense was total BS for me. It took me a year and then I got pregnant again. I've practically gained nothing compared to last time. I have no desire to do that again. GL!

LollyBug18

My DD was 9 months when I got PG with this LO. She was getting to be very mobile and I had been lazy about getting back into shape and those two things combined, I believe, have made for a pretty rough pregnancy this time around. There was more than one time that I thought it'd have been easier if it had happened when she was younger and, like PP said, moving less and sleeping more during the day. And, of course, it would have also been easier had I been in better shape from the start. I had lost all the weight from my first pregnancy but I hadn't started on getting any of my muscle tone back and, as a result, my abdomen and back have been a lot sorer.

Anne Mommy

Mine will be almost 2 years apart so I'm not sure if I can really comment too much. I just wanted to throw out that I had bad postpartum depression after my first. It took me a good 6 months on medication to feel like a real person again. It was a few more months until I actually wanted to have sex again. We wanted kids close together but for my mental health and for that of the babies, it wouldn't have been good for us to try that soon.