Parenting after 35

To those who conceived through IVF

I am 41 and DH is 44 and I am trying to decide when and what to do with my last frozen embryo. Our first child we conceived on our own when I was 38 and we had a healthy boy at 39.  DD is who we needed to go for IVF for. She was born on 7/18. Now I always felt (even before I got married) that I would be happy with two children. Well now I have the boy and girl. Thing is we still have one frozen embie on ice. I just can't come to deciding when to let it go and not pay for the storage anymore. First I was going to do it when DD was born now wait until she is a year old ... out of that whole SIDS phase ... I know something could happen to her at any time. . Has anyone been in this situation. I am not menopausal yet, and DH and I feel we are done with two kids .. .who even knows if the embryo is really healthy. Would you discard it or donate it when the time came?

Re: To those who conceived through IVF

  • Our plan was to donate to research if there were any left (there were not), so that would be what I would do but I would make sure to wait until you feel very comfortable about not having any more kids for sure. The storage cost isn't that much if I recall & it would be peace of mind that you're making the right choice.


  • We are religious and believe God created all of our embryos for a reason. We have six on ice and are going to go for one more child. If we have any left after all of this, we will donate them to research because they could possibly be the key to solving some sort of disease.
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  • I would be okay donating to another couple but my DH wasn't/isn't at all so we donate them to research.

    None of our embies have been freezable so we ended up donating 15 the first time (17 fertilized, 2 put in, 15 left over).  We donated none the second time as there weren't any left over.

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