Question from luker - support for mothers?

BlueRidge8

I have so much respect for you all and know there is such a wealth of knowledge on this board, I hope you don't mind my asking this.

My sister is 20 and has always dealt with depression. She's been on several anti-depressants in an attempt to alleviate the symptoms but they have not found anything that works for her yet. She regularly sees a therapist and has been diagnosed with depression, OCD, generalized anxiety and potentially ADHD. She self-harms by scratching  her arms- that's the extent that we are aware of.

Growing up we always 'talked out" our emotions and my mom is a wonderful listener and supporter - but she is struggling with this. My sister seems very open with her, and I know it weighs on her (mom) to be carrying it around. Is there such a thing as a support group for family members? I feel like it would be so helpful for my mom to be able to share with other mothers/fathers going through this? She's seeking guidance on what she should and should not do/say towards my sister - and I think to just talk it out with someone who understands.

I apologize if this is not an appropriate topic or if I misused any terminology. I just feel helpless right now. I will probably DD the specifics later. Thank you! 

BlueRidge8

-auntie-:

I'm sorry your family is dealing with this.

Cutting is such a cry for help and as such is so hard on all involved. It's hard because you sister is obviously an adult; so that even if your mom is paying for this therapy she is on the outside. Does your mom ever sit in on a therapy session with your sister? I think an open dialog of how your sister can best be supported could be useful all around if your sister is open to it.

For more generlized support NAMI is the go to resource for families. They are a fabulous organization and should be able to help your mom find support and direction.

https://www.nami.org/

That's an interesting laundry list of diagnoses. Do you feel like she's appropriately dx'd? A lot of what you are describing- anxiety, OCD, self-injurous behavior and ADHD-like behaviors (especially around executive function)- are very similar to how the young women with Aspergers present. Is you sister bright? Does she have strong interests? How does she do socially? Is she in college or working?

Thank you so much, Auntie. I will definitely look into NAMI.

I was surprised by the diagnoses she's received, especially the OCD. I've never noticed any direct "rituals" that she has - besides avoiding mirrors and the scratching.

She is smart - but always a C or B student. She's in college now and has struggled to maintain C's in some classes - but excels in her major courses. She's very intro graphic arts and has actually won some national competitions in that area.

She's always been obsessive. I remember we had to explain to her when she was 2 or 3 that not every child wanted to talk about her favorite show. That seems to have ebbed somewhat. 

From reading information in the past, and on this board, I have considered aspergers. She's always struggled with personal hygiene - which I think is a red flag? But she seems to do well socially. She's active in her sorority and has a close group of friends. Though I'm told they have approached her recently with concern for her (this sent her into a tailspin because it meant they were "talking about her")

Depression is on both sides of our family, particularly my dad's.