Holy Tantrums!

lildayzees

My kiddos are 15 months apart.  My LO1 is 18-months old, and she's recently started throwing the worst tantrums - usually when she wants attention while I'm feeding/tending to her brother.

How do you handle these tantrums?  I know she needs to get used to having to share me, but I don't know what more I can do.  I give her plenty of one-on-one time.  She has lots of new "quiet toys" to occupy her while I'm busy with LO2.  In general she's as sweet as can be to him, but those moments when she screams/hits/wails are so frustrating because I can't rationalize with a girl who can't talk back!   Help!

kge9602

I am so sorry you are going through that. My 2 are also 15 months apart and I know exactly what you mean...there was seriously a 6 week period where I thought I was going to lose my mind!!! Everyone kept saying, "oh it'll get better" and "just wait it out" UGH!!! Yah, like I have any control over that??!!! What really helped me was other people taking LO1 out for day trips. I guess I rationalized in my mind that she needed more stimulation than her toys at home or what I could give her since now I had to split my time, so if that's at all possible, I highly recommend handing your older child over to a close friend or family member, even if just for a couple of hours. It'll give you some much needed quiet time, and if you're lucky, LO2 will be asleep long enough for you to take a hot bath : It's amazing what just a little pampering can do. And yes, time does help, but in the interim, a quick trip out of the house for LO1 helps too. It was also the time that I started sending my LO1 to daycare for additional external stimulation. She has been going part time now for 2 weeks and I have noticed a difference...I don't know if that is possible for you, I know I wasn't thrilled about it at first, but it's a great way for her to use up that energy : my friend also told me of this group called "MOPS" mothers of preschoolers. I haven't done it, but they're free monthly meetings usually at a church or somewhere with a meeting room for area moms to get together while they provide FREE babysitting. Google it for more info, but in any case, hang in there and I hope it gets better for you!

Kaiterz

Try including the 18 month old in what you're doing w/ #2. It was about that time my dd got really into helping mommy.

MrsEllis10

Kaiterz:

Try including the 18 month old in what you're doing w/ #2. It was about that time my dd got really into helping mommy.

I agree. When I am changing DD2's diaper I ask DD1 to help. She carries stuff for me or I'll ask her to hand me something. Also, when I am feeding DD2 that is the only time I don't let DD1 sit in the chair with us. I say "Emily's turn" and immediately after I am done with feeding her and I can put her down I get a toy and play with DD1 or I'll let her come sit with me and I'll say "Madeline's turn". This has worked out very well for us. I only had a 3 day period of tantrums, but I was very consistent and everything has worked out. While she was having her tantrum I would sit her down and tell her no and then stare at her until she stopped. I've tried the whole ignoring thing with her and that just doesn't work like it might for other kids. Seriously staring at her until she stops has helped. LOL!