SS court yesterday

NewMoM2Be10

okkk i had been gone a while.. but i have alooot of things going on its crazy.. our church wedding is is 11 days... im doing last minute things.. my SS's started school this week.. yayyy ! and then a biiig bomb exploded two nights ago...

BM texts my SS(16) and says you have court tomorrow at 5pm.. (for a truancy case when he was under her custody).. and im like WTF lady why dont you tell us days ahead so we can plan.. thankfully i didnt work and DH wasnt going to be busy in the evening at his jobsite.. so that p!$sed me off... then i decided ill stay home with the rest of the kiddos and you can take him to court. so it seemed like foreverrrrr until they came back and my DH walks in the door and gives me SS's cell phone.. ipod.. xbox and everything else and says "hes grounded" im like okkk?! whats going on. So turns out he was drug tested and came back positive for marijuana.. and when he was asked where he got it from .. from his cousins on his moms side I WASS SOOOO DISAPPOINTED and HEART BROKEN. he swore to me he hadnt done it since last year yada yada yada.. and i feel let down.. i tried to trust him with all my heart... and now i feel like all the trust is gone. i dont trust him home alone .i dont trust him near my purse,, and i feel upset because i did not grow up around these things. and i refuuusee to let my LO's be around this crap.. the judge ordered rehab and curfew at 7.. which trust me.. he isn's going anywhere. i was thinking of getting him help like a therapist or psychologist. i am torn.anyone else going or have gone through this?

TIA

 

twister22

Not going through this but it sounds like you and YH will do a great job getting SS past this. Taking electronics, keeping him home, and having him in rehab are all good steps. I think the therapist is a great idea too. T&Ps your way and best of luck!

Holly_1007

I agree with twister.  once DH cools down, sit down and have a discussion with him and SS, he needs to fess up about where/when/how etc.  don't be mad/acusatory but it is okay to tell him you are dissapointed in him.  he needs to show you that you can trust him again, so I'm glad you took all the electronics away from him and have him on lockdown.  therapy isnt a bad idea as well, just so he has a neutral outlet during this time. 

NewMoM2Be10

thanks ladies. i know the rehab wil pick him up straight after school and drop him off after his sessions which is a huuge relief because it is about 15 miles away. i hope this helps him and im sure he feels cornered. but like i told my DH he needs to learn his actions have consequences and we will not tolerate this behavior. and i hope there isnt a big deal over this insurance wise.. i hope they dont give us a hard time with itt