Custody/Visitation for newborn?

Karebear3486

I was wondering if anyone else has experience with custody/visitation arrangements with a newborn, and what kind of schedule you came up with that worked well. I'm having a hard time finding information regarding this, most of the information I'm finding is for older children where both parents have been fully involved. I'm mostly concerned with when to start overnights... I'm not in a hurry and I'll be breastfeeding for as long as possible. My husband and I are currently going through a divorce and I'm due in 4 weeks. Any recommendations/experiences/resources would be much appreciated!

pinitbaby

My situation is different from yours-babys father hasn't contacted me in any way since 20wks pregnant so I will be filing for sole custody of her and will be putting restrictions on him for anger management/parenting classes and prohibit him from weed and alcohol if he chooses to be around my daughter.

My advice to you would be to go for sole custody of your baby. I hate to say it but you have to get angry and stay angry. You don't want to not have an order in place and have him take her for a visit and not give her back, that would be devastating. You need to put your residence as her primary home too. If there are restrictions you want to put on, write them down and seek legal advice about them. i dont' know if you guys are civil with each other but after things start to settle he may try to get smart and make it hard for you to get back at you. Just keep these things in mind..I have learned the hard way with my exH of 12 yrs-I let our 13yr old son go live with him and its been a nightmare, I have sole custody of all 3 of our children but since his dad isn't willingly going to give him back I have to take him to court. Its just one thing after the other UGH

I wish you the best with everything, don't let feelings control how you feel about the situation. The judge is out for the best interest of your baby, not how bad he hurt you and such. Be strong!

FyreFlyeRush

My arrangement just went through a complete collapse. We were doing Mon/Tues 57 and every other Sat/Sun 101. We're ordered to do Tues/Thurs 57 and the same weekend arrangement as above.

I am breastfeeding, and the court ordered me to put him on a bottle for his visits. LO had other ideas.

I hate it. I have to deal with him EVERY OTHER DAY. It grates on my nerves. But, we're in a different situation. It's extremely hostile. Instead of getting better, it got worse. Until today, when it imploded.

PP gave excellent advice. I'm fighting for sole custody because we can't even agree on something as vitally important and medically proven as breastfeeding or Back To Sleep. The little stuff is worse.

Keep your emails. Because I have a bunch saying how I'm unreasonable because I don't give him extra time for his mom to visit or how I refuse to talk to him any way other than email I don't and my lawyer says its good enough to how a trend in conflict, even if we both look like jackasses.

scout426

pinitbaby:

My situation is different from yours-babys father hasn't contacted me in any way since 20wks pregnant so I will be filing for sole custody of her and will be putting restrictions on him for anger management/parenting classes and prohibit him from weed and alcohol if he chooses to be around my daughter.

Unfortunately You don't get to put those restrictions on him.  You have to get a judge to do that.  And it's not as easy as you make it to be.  I hope he doesnt come back around bc he doesnt sound like he has much to offer.  However, in case he does be aware.  

If you don't put the father's name on the birth certificate then he has to fight for his rights as a father.  If you put it on the bc then he has the same rights as you do until court.  It just depends what you want to do.  Personally I would talk it out with a lawyer so you know what can/can't happen.