Parenting after 35
FyreFlyeRush
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Midlife Crisis LONG XP from Single Parents
FyreFlyeRush
member
I'm at a crossroads in life. I'm not sure where to go from here. While on maternity leave, the company I work for lost their contract. My father told me the other day, "If you aren't in a stable enough job to provide security for your kids, you need a sharp kick in the butt." My chosen career and industry is far from stable. I'm in IT and I work as a government contractor. That's about as stable as walking a tightrope during and earth quake. So, now I'm looking at options.
I can try to find a job locally that isn't contract labor. It won't pay as well, but I'm not I'm danger of losing my job every year, or going through a contract renegotiation every 3. However, as technology changes and people move toward outsourcing, I'm becoming as obsolete as the computers I support.
I can look elsewhere. I can make more money and have better stability in Dallas or Houston. There are bigger companies with room for growth beyond what I do. I have family in California and Kansas. Friends in Tulsa. A fresh clean start. But, I like being near my mom, and my daughter only has two years of school before college. Plus, he could fight the move. Although, I think going from no income to income is a significant enough change in status, that the judge would deny his request.
Or, I can take this opening and have a complete midlife crisis. Ditch my dead end career and go back to school. I'd qualify for loans and grants. Free/subsidized child care. They provide a decent stipend. I can stay with my parents. I'd only have to leave LO for a few hours each day, and could use the campus daycare. I might even qualify for family housing down the line. I also have a year of Uni credits under my belt. I'd only need 3 maybe 3.5 more. I could lessen that with CLEP testing and online courses.
I feel as though this juncture in my life is here for a purpose. I've always chosen the path that gets me what I want the fastest in life before. I hasn't always worked out for me. I've been praying for guidance and suddenly, here I am with all these options before me.
I know this:
1 I'm so sick of help desk. I hate the people. I hate the politics. I hate that people look down on me because it's entry level. I hate that I'm always the fall guy. I hate that everyone wants the Lamborghini of computers, but they only want to pay for a Hyundai. I LOVE working with computers. But, I can easily keep that a hobby.
2 I want to get away from SD. I don't want to block access to LO, but I want that space. It's been proven that MY mental well being directly affects LO's mental well being. Plus, I have no friends here anymore. Once my parents retire, THEY won't be here as often, either.
3 The best chance to make those happen is to go back to school. I can get training and knowledge in something beyond what I'm doing. I can stay in IT, or change to something completely different. It's the scariest of the options. And, the one with the most potential. I can go to seminary school... I can become a probono lawyer... I could become a librarian... A teacher... It's a new lease on life.
I just don't know what to do. Opinion?
I can try to find a job locally that isn't contract labor. It won't pay as well, but I'm not I'm danger of losing my job every year, or going through a contract renegotiation every 3. However, as technology changes and people move toward outsourcing, I'm becoming as obsolete as the computers I support.
I can look elsewhere. I can make more money and have better stability in Dallas or Houston. There are bigger companies with room for growth beyond what I do. I have family in California and Kansas. Friends in Tulsa. A fresh clean start. But, I like being near my mom, and my daughter only has two years of school before college. Plus, he could fight the move. Although, I think going from no income to income is a significant enough change in status, that the judge would deny his request.
Or, I can take this opening and have a complete midlife crisis. Ditch my dead end career and go back to school. I'd qualify for loans and grants. Free/subsidized child care. They provide a decent stipend. I can stay with my parents. I'd only have to leave LO for a few hours each day, and could use the campus daycare. I might even qualify for family housing down the line. I also have a year of Uni credits under my belt. I'd only need 3 maybe 3.5 more. I could lessen that with CLEP testing and online courses.
I feel as though this juncture in my life is here for a purpose. I've always chosen the path that gets me what I want the fastest in life before. I hasn't always worked out for me. I've been praying for guidance and suddenly, here I am with all these options before me.
I know this:
1 I'm so sick of help desk. I hate the people. I hate the politics. I hate that people look down on me because it's entry level. I hate that I'm always the fall guy. I hate that everyone wants the Lamborghini of computers, but they only want to pay for a Hyundai. I LOVE working with computers. But, I can easily keep that a hobby.
2 I want to get away from SD. I don't want to block access to LO, but I want that space. It's been proven that MY mental well being directly affects LO's mental well being. Plus, I have no friends here anymore. Once my parents retire, THEY won't be here as often, either.
3 The best chance to make those happen is to go back to school. I can get training and knowledge in something beyond what I'm doing. I can stay in IT, or change to something completely different. It's the scariest of the options. And, the one with the most potential. I can go to seminary school... I can become a probono lawyer... I could become a librarian... A teacher... It's a new lease on life.
I just don't know what to do. Opinion?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Midlife Crisis LONG XP from Single Parents
I tried this before and discovered I liked money more. But, I didn't get child support, and I didn't qualify for child care assistance. I liked school a lot, but needed income. I'm getting about 1200/month in child support right now, so that will help a lot.
A lot to think about, but I would think very hard about moving away from family that can help you out. At this point, you need support and you won't find that in a strange city, even with whatever services are available.
As for some of the career options, be very realistic about teaching, seminary, etc. With unemployment such as it is, those jobs are often very hard to come by right now. Even substitute teaching, which used to be a good option, is nearly non-existant. My cousin is in his 30s and has struggled for several years now to find a permanent teaching position. His wife is a newly ordained minister and even that was very difficult to find a job. Plus it doesn't pay squat.
Good luck.
Awesome! My .02 is that an education is always worth it, but then I'm a nerd who was fortunate enough to have her parents pay for her education.
I reckon you WANT to go in a new direction, improve you prospects and have a job that both you and Alien can be proud of.
Good luck, girl!
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I do want to go in a new direction. It's just scary. Work... I know work. Having a steady income is so nice. I called the school, and there's no reason I shouldn't be accepted that they can see. Scary stuff!!!
Scary stuff but you can totally do it! Keep us updated.
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