I don't think I have ever been so offended

annmengland

i've peeked at that board and everyone just seems so judgemental and damn right nasty!!  it makes me happy that when the conversation does come up, our nice group of ladies will be gentle lol

MommyPhoenix

Hi draeray!

First of all *hugs* for you. Sorry that  you're upset, I can't imagine what makes some people so opinionated!  My Hubby told one of his coworkers (we'll call him "Larry") the names that we chose:  Harper Avery or Reagan Olivia for a girl and Blake Rylan or Reece Graysen for a boy and  "Larry" responded by saying "Those are HORRIBLE names!".....okay Larry.  My hubby aptly responded, "You know what name my wife and I really hate? LARRY!"...did I mention his name was Larry?  I know, I know, an eye for an eye is not cool, but it was funny!  The name you choose is solely for your own little one and nobody else! So to those nasty commenters, be kind, it may not mean something to you and you may not care for it, but that's a dear sweet name of a little baby and there's meaning behind the name for the parents!  I like the names you've chosen (Jayce is a really great name)! Take care

AbbieAdams

JuliaBug:

JumpAroundBucky:

If you are getting that upset over what internet strangers are saying, a public internet forum may not be the best place for you. It's unfortunate that you didn't get the responses you were looking for, but that's the risk you take when you post on a public forum. You can't expect people to reply a certain way based on what you would do. Everyone has their own opinions

Names are hard- you feel so attached to them, but others don't. If you can't handle negative opinions about your name, I would recommend keeping them to yourself. The baby names board overall (along with many other people not on that board) is very against changing spellings of names and prefers classic names. Lurking on a new board before posting is always a good idea  

FTR, I prefer Gage out of your options. Cheer up, they're just random people on the internet that have no impact on your life.  

ETA: I just went back and read the thread you posted, and honestly, I don't think they were that mean. They simply stated their opinions and what the names made them think of. People you meet IRL will be making the same connections they did.   

This.

I didn't think their responses were that bad. I posted some of my early ideas over there and I thought that the feedback that I got was really helpful. You asked for help and I think that you got some honest, albeit blunt, answers. 

All of this. I've posted there a few times and have gotten some very good (and harsh) positive and negative feedback about names. I take it with a grain of salt. They're good at pointing out references I wouldn't have thought of, which is nice since we're not discussing names with family or friends. But then again it's my child and if I think that Blue-Bear Jugglewinks is the most perfect, beautiful name on the planet, then that's what I'm going to use regardless what an anonymous internet board thinks of it. I also know that if I post "What do you think of Blue-Bear Jugglewinks???" that I will soundly get my @ss ripped.

It also helps to lurk on new boards for a while before posting, to get a feel for how the board runs. Every board has a different personality and culture. Delaying a post until you get the feel of the board can save you a lot of frustration and heartache in the long run.  

NicoleN82

annmengland:

i've peeked at that board and everyone just seems so judgemental and damn right nasty!!  it makes me happy that when the conversation does come up, our nice group of ladies will be gentle lol

Well, we would hope people are gentle, but I would honestly be surprised if it goes that way.  Don't get me wrong, I love our group and our board, but we do have opinions and it is hard to read tone on an internet forum.

draeray

The intention of posting the 3 names was to get which name people liked best (even if people thought all 3 were bad names- pick the less of the 3 evils). We have narrowed it down to those three out of a list of many.  

I completely understand that not everyone is going to agree with our style or the names we have chosen as I don't agree with a lot of people on their choices either (I guess I am just more conscience with other people?s feelings than some).  We have considered all of the cons and all of the associations and we are still going to decide on one of the three.

Our goal was to find out which one of the 3 most people liked- even if they wouldn't pick it for themselves because one of those names will be our baby's 

As stated previously, we learned our lesson and won't be coming to the board with baby name ideas

Although, I must say, even with the some of the criticism I received from some of the ladies here on this board, it was done constructively and I don't feel so attacked and chastised as I did on the other one. I guess I should have lurked before I posted but assumed all boards were as friendly as this.

 

JumpAroundBucky

draeray:

The intention of posting the 3 names was to get which name people liked best (even if people thought all 3 were bad names- pick the less of the 3 evils). We have narrowed it down to those three out of a list of many.  

I completely understand that not everyone is going to agree with our style or the names we have chosen as I don't agree with a lot of people on their choices either (I guess I am just more conscience with other people?s feelings than some).  We have considered all of the cons and all of the associations and we are still going to decide on one of the three.

Our goal was to find out which one of the 3 most people liked- even if they wouldn't pick it for themselves because one of those names will be our baby's 

As stated previously, we learned our lesson and won't be coming to the board with baby name ideas

Although, I must say, even with the some of the criticism I received from some of the ladies here on this board, it was done constructively and I don't feel so attacked and chastised as I did on the other one. I guess I should have lurked before I posted but assumed all boards were as friendly as this.

 

Just so you know, this is one of the most P&R boards I have seen on TB. Just something to keep in mind when venturing out to other boards

Kate504

They are pretty snobby about names over there. They tend to like older names a lot. I always just say that it isn't something I'd use or my style. I'm not going to rip the person a new one over it

chelsea13elyse

I can't believe many of those responses. I went over and read it and couldn't believe some of the things those women posted. I even responded to some of them. I'm still in awe. I'm so sorry that you had that experience. I'm sure many women will see this and now know not to even bother going over there and doing the same, I know I won't be posting anything on that board. At least we all know now for the future! Good Luck with the name search, I really like Gage and Jayce!

scorch

You very clearly stated that you wanted our help.  I wasnt don't really like any of your picks for first names , but they would make good middle names. You need to calm the eff down and remember its a message board, you got EXACTLY WHAT YOU ASKED FOR.

budgirl007

lylahlove:

The couple times I've been on that board, I've seen nothing but similar responses. 

If you and your husband like the name you choose, that's really all that matters Don't let a board of internet strangers who enjoy putting others down change your mind.  

Ditto. I posted DS's name there and got a lot of neutral responses and a few negative as well. I learned my lesson and won't be doing it again! I still used the name we had picked as we loved it, but I learned not to post there this time around as it is hard to hear all of that about a name you love! I'd post your name choices on our board and you'll get honest answers that aren't nasty!!

anglgrl718

I definitely lurk around the baby name and the baby shower boards for entertainment purposes. I've noticed that many many times, especially on the baby shower board, that the questions being asked are ignored and two cents that wasn't asked for is typically the response people get. Many of the women on those boards are way more concerned with etiquette or proper name spelling than what the person is actually asking.

Because I don't actually post on those boards I find it highly entertaining and funny but sometimes I just feel so bad for the OP. I refuse to say anything though because it doesn't matter if what you're saying makes total sense, they'll find a reason why you're wrong and you get flamed too.

I'm so sorry you got hurt. I am gonna throw out one thing I think about with one of the names though. Gage makes me think of the kid from the movie Pet Cemetary. But I like Jayce, just spelled Jace because, like others said, Jayce makes me think of a girls name.

Although, you did give me another name to add to my favorites list. I really like Jaycee for a girl!! Thank you!

draeray

anglgrl718:

I definitely lurk around the baby name and the baby shower boards for entertainment purposes. I've noticed that many many times, especially on the baby shower board, that the questions being asked are ignored and two cents that wasn't asked for is typically the response people get. Many of the women on those boards are way more concerned with etiquette or proper name spelling than what the person is actually asking. Because I don't actually post on those boards I find it highly entertaining and funny but sometimes I just feel so bad for the OP. I refuse to say anything though because it doesn't matter if what you're saying makes total sense, they'll find a reason why you're wrong and you get flamed too. I'm so sorry you got hurt. I am gonna throw out one thing I think about with one of the names though. Gage makes me think of the kid from the movie Pet Cemetary. But I like Jayce, just spelled Jace because, like others said, Jayce makes me think of a girls name. Although, you did give me another name to add to my favorites list. I really like Jaycee for a girl!! Thank you!

Yeah, I do like Jaycee for a girl too. I think it's totally cute and even aa little different.

Gage, I know is the little boy from Pet Cemetary and although I knew that, it wasn't something that came to mind. I did think: shotgun, gauge of your ears, etc. I think Gage is our least favorite of the three. 

 As far as the Teen Mom reference that some posters are talking about for Jase, I don't watch Teen Mom so I guess I wouldn't have thought about that one either.

I will be talking to my husband with the spelling of Jayce to see if he likes Jace or Jase. But I am not sure if he will say much since his name is Stacy

Fink

draeray:

The intention of posting the 3 names was to get which name people liked best (even if people thought all 3 were bad names- pick the less of the 3 evils). We have narrowed it down to those three out of a list of many.  

I completely understand that not everyone is going to agree with our style or the names we have chosen as I don't agree with a lot of people on their choices either (I guess I am just more conscience with other people?s feelings than some).  We have considered all of the cons and all of the associations and we are still going to decide on one of the three.

Our goal was to find out which one of the 3 most people liked- even if they wouldn't pick it for themselves because one of those names will be our baby's 

As stated previously, we learned our lesson and won't be coming to the board with baby name ideas

Although, I must say, even with the some of the criticism I received from some of the ladies here on this board, it was done constructively and I don't feel so attacked and chastised as I did on the other one. I guess I should have lurked before I posted but assumed all boards were as friendly as this.

 

You probably missed my post on the BNB since I posted after you said you weren't coming back.  Its below and not mean - I promise!  :-).  

FWIW, when I wanted to know between our final two names which people liked best, I listed the names and explained that I wasn't looking for an opinion about whether anyone liked the names; only that I wanted to know which one people liked better.  People actually respected my wishes and just voted for one of the two names.  Good luck naming you LO!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Unfortunately, this is just the way this board is.  You have to either accept it or don't come here.  While I am a firm believer that you can always relay your honest opinion in a polite manner, sadly, not everyone agrees or attempts to do so. 

As for the names:

I LOVE the name Jace.  I adamantly disagree with anyone who says it doesn't age well (not sure if anyone said that it doesn't on this thread but it has been said before) and I've never seen Teen Mom and neither have any of my friends.  We would have used it ourselves if there wasn't a family issue with the name.   

Ryker: my DH and I actually liked the name a lot but since since the jail is near us, we agreed that we couldn't use it.  If you don't live in the NY/NJ area, that might not matter to you. 

Gage: NMS.  We are also huge Stephen King fans.  The little boy in Pet Semetary was named Gage and that is not a good association for us.

draeray

Fink:

draeray:

The intention of posting the 3 names was to get which name people liked best (even if people thought all 3 were bad names- pick the less of the 3 evils). We have narrowed it down to those three out of a list of many.  

I completely understand that not everyone is going to agree with our style or the names we have chosen as I don't agree with a lot of people on their choices either (I guess I am just more conscience with other people?s feelings than some).  We have considered all of the cons and all of the associations and we are still going to decide on one of the three.

Our goal was to find out which one of the 3 most people liked- even if they wouldn't pick it for themselves because one of those names will be our baby's 

As stated previously, we learned our lesson and won't be coming to the board with baby name ideas

Although, I must say, even with the some of the criticism I received from some of the ladies here on this board, it was done constructively and I don't feel so attacked and chastised as I did on the other one. I guess I should have lurked before I posted but assumed all boards were as friendly as this.

 

You probably missed my post on the BNB since I posted after you said you weren't coming back.  Its below and not mean - I promise!  :-).  

FWIW, when I wanted to know between our final two names which people liked best, I listed the names and explained that I wasn't looking for an opinion about whether anyone liked the names; only that I wanted to know which one people liked better.  People actually respected my wishes and just voted for one of the two names.  Good luck naming you LO!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Unfortunately, this is just the way this board is.  You have to either accept it or don't come here.  While I am a firm believer that you can always relay your honest opinion in a polite manner, sadly, not everyone agrees or attempts to do so. 

As for the names:

I LOVE the name Jace.  I adamantly disagree with anyone who says it doesn't age well (not sure if anyone said that it doesn't on this thread but it has been said before) and I've never seen Teen Mom and neither have any of my friends.  We would have used it ourselves if there wasn't a family issue with the name.   

Ryker: my DH and I actually liked the name a lot but since since the jail is near us, we agreed that we couldn't use it.  If you don't live in the NY/NJ area, that might not matter to you. 

Gage: NMS.  We are also huge Stephen King fans.  The little boy in Pet Semetary was named Gage and that is not a good association for us.

Thanks! I ended up deleting my post over there because I didn't want the circus to continue as some of it is making its way over here to this board.

nuttycoconut

I didn't read the post on baby names but I'm sorry your feelings were hurt. I lurked for quite awhile before posting my names on there and was looking forward to really honest responses. I found that they were pretty blunt, but that's what I wanted and needed. I would post on a board you are a regular on if you wanted the sugar coated responses. However, I think it's helpful to know what people really think of your names, and then, if you and DH still like them,  use what you love!  

I get how difficult boy names are because Dh and I have been struggling for a whole too. Of your names, Gage and Ryker are nms but I think Jace (no "y") is super cute and I love that it honors your brother. Jason is one of my favorite boy names.  

meganwv

I like all three names! I haven't been on the baby name board, but I certainly wouldn't let them bum you out! Whatever makes you and your husband happy is all that matters and those hateful people can go find someone else to be nasty to. They are probably miserable people who enjoy hurting others. P. S. I had a student named Riker last year and never had a negative thought about the name!

SamanthaG+3

Ryker is our top choice (well only choice really lol) for a boy, and has been for the past 6 years, but we had 2 girls instead, so we may possibly get to use it this time, we'll find out in 2.5 weeks! Although DH INSISTS on spelling it Riker and won't budge on it

Most people hate that name, but whatever, we've loved it for a really long time. 

buggirl72

mediaperuana:

draeray:

Thanks everyone for the support, feedback and advice.

And Gage-- yes, 12 gauge, 10 gauge shot gun comes to people's mind. We don't care about that either.

 If it helps, when I hear Gage I think of knitting!

I thought of the character from Pet Cemetery. Gage is my favorite from your list.  

ViolentFemme

A friend of mine who just had her first advised me not to tell other people what names you're considering,cause people can be so mean and judgmental. You're experience was a classic example, and I'm sorry you had to experience that. You names are lovely, and in the end you'll choose the perfect name for that perfect baby.

 

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bar italia

well to be fair, all of those names are pretty awful. 

tiffanyp

mediaperuana:

draeray:

Thanks everyone for the support, feedback and advice.

And Gage-- yes, 12 gauge, 10 gauge shot gun comes to people's mind. We don't care about that either.

 If it helps, when I hear Gage I think of knitting!

I'm an engineer, and I think of metal wire thickness. lol 

areadinger

For the record... I love the name Jayce!

wells2010

Choose whichever name you love!

However, whenever you post asking people's opinions you have to realize that they just might give it to you!

wells2010

ellephunt:

The girl name we have picked out is not popular on the bump. That's why I don't plan on sharing until after our baby is born. Then people have to shut up and deal with it

 

I am with you on this! (well, I don't know if our name will be popular or not) Either way, we are keeping it a secret.

SunshineMuffin

I didn't see the post on BN, so I don't know what was said to you.  What I do know is that some people seem to think that giving an opinion gives free reign to be rude and nasty.  There are ways to say things without being unnecessarily rude.  

versace1008

if it makes you feel better I like your names... I think you shouldnt tell people the names until the baby is born thats it...my bro and sis in law kept asking what names we liked, as in my parents and me and we picked the one we liked and then they had the baby, still no name bec they couldnt decide then they changed it, I am like why did they even ask...so I think you should keep it to yourself then when the baby is born announce it then...