Taking an older child to the A/S

RachelG1016

I have a 14 year old DS and he has been an only child. I got married 2 years ago and we are expecting in January.

The A/S is scheduled for next Thursday and we are considering bringing DS with us. We want to have him as involved in the pregnancy as he chooses to be and he has said that he would like to come.

How would you feel bringing your teenage child to the ultrasound? Part of me wants it to be just me and DH because we plan to find out the sex and it seems like an intimate moment but another part feels that DS should be involved too.

BrideBuddies

Call me a prude, but there are just some images of my parents that I don't want to have burned into my brain.   This might be one of those things that is best left for mom and dad and not jr., ya know?

I dunno.  Tough call.

 

rsd12

I think what would have me more concerned is what if there is something wrong with the baby. As long as you have a plan, for if he is ready to leave or you want him to leave as a back up.

FyreFlyeRush

rsd12:

I think what would have me more concerned is what if there is something wrong with the baby. As long as you have a plan, for if he is ready to leave or you want him to leave as a back up.

This was my first issue with bringing DD, she was 15 at the time. In the end, I'd already had an anatomy scan at my amnio so I knew everything was ok. I would have taken her but...the MFM's policy was no children, even a 15 year old.

If your OB/MFM says its ok, I'm sure he'll love it. I was 12 when my mom was pregnant with my sister and the ultrasound was so COOL!!!

aurora1974

I took my DD who was 17 at the time.  i wouldn't have had it any other way, but we are very close since it was only her and I until she was 13.  She was very involved with everything and even was going to be in the room when I delivered (staying at my head so she didn't see anything she wasn't comfortable with) until I had to have a c-section and only one person could be with me. 

gimmietimmies

My older two have been to the a/s. they were glued to the screen the whole time. The tech explained everything she was doing, and they were totally fascinated. Best part was when the tech turned on 4d and they got to see face. When S came they had to check out if the face was like the picture.

jlw2505

I can't imagine anyone else being there but DH and I.  What if you see something of concern during the ultra sound?  Do you really want him in the room for that?  I would get some good pics of the baby and show them to your older child after and leave it at that.

stever

I totally would. All he'd see is your belly.

gimmietimmies

stever:

I totally would. All he'd see is your belly.

Precisely. Here they aren't allowed to give you any info, in case they're wrong. Plus, the radiologist is the one that reviews the scan, not the tech, so the tech could get in trouble for being out of their scope of practice. If there were anything concerning, they'd call for a follow up, that would be after The appointment anyway.

rsd12

gimmietimmies:

stever:

I totally would. All he'd see is your belly.

Precisely. Here they aren't allowed to give you any info, in case they're wrong. Plus, the radiologist is the one that reviews the scan, not the tech, so the tech could get in trouble for being out of their scope of practice. If there were anything concerning, they'd call for a follow up, that would be after The appointment anyway.

Not at my office, the doctor sees you right after. I guess because I have been there with bad news via the big ultrasound, I would just make make sure I take extra precautions if I had an older child that ws interested. Possibly by my husband and I driving seperately. Not saying that anything will be wrong, but this could be the worse case scenario.

MesmrEwe

If the clinic we went to didn't have rules against anyone under the age of 12 being in the room there's absolutely no doubt in my mind that we would have brought DD along (she was 6 at the time)...

The key being that HE wants to come along, not just "yea, you're getting to see the baby in your belly, whatever.." If your DS wants to be there then why not, it's something that he'll learn a lot from as he gets older.  IMO, you can't shield them from everything especially at that age, if he's interested in going, and isn't in school then, go for it!