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JELLYRUNNER01

LindseyG2010

I left son's father for the same reason - I just didn't want to force a relationship that I was not happy with.  He tried to make me feel guilty by saying that  I was tearing apart our family and not trying hard enough, but I had to use all of my strength to ignore his harsh words and put my feelings (and my son's wellbeing) first.  I grew up with parents that hated each other (and still do) and I don't want my son to be raised like that.  I left so that I could minimize the damage between myself and my ex's relationship and so that I could find someone who really made me happy.  I want to be able to be an example to my son of what a good, healthy relationship is.  I was never shown that by my parents and after a little self-evaluation I can see many ways that it has messed me up.  I think I'm doing pretty good for myself, but as I said, I had to get out of that relationship so that I could build one with someone who really makes me happy.

 You are not alone and you are not doing the wrong thing!  You are the most important influence in your child's life and you need to be the good example that he/she will follow.  You have to be a good person if you want your child to grow up to be a good person...and looking out for your own happiness is a big part of what will make you a better person.  Being unhappy will not do you (or your child) any good.  You need to be happy in order to have your head on straight and to have a clear mind when raising your little one.