no longer paying bm's way

lily_721

I have been paying for all BM's pictures, gifts, etc. She irritated me so much. She recently told DH she wanted half of his current retirement. They were married twenty years ago for five years. She already got her divorce settlement long ago. I gave her notice that i will not pay for her portion of the school pictures. She has the deadline and the package amounts. She doesnt have visitation and doesnt pay child support. She is now asking the boys to send her last year's leftover pictures so she can send them to her family. Nope. If she can afford a harley she can pay 10 for the basic package.

lily_721

That was worded much stronger than I intended hard to re read on my phone SS1 told her a month ago that we would send her the senior picture information when we got it. We recieved the regular school picture info today for SS2. So this shouldnt have been a surprise.

Holly_1007

as long as the divorce was settled, you have nothing to worry about, she might TRY to go back to court, but I doubt she would pay for an attorney from what you have written.  I don't blame you for not wanting to pay for things for her.  DH has to pay for all his own school pics as NCP, IMO they have some cheap pic packages available. 

Kaeldrasmommy

That is such utter crap, I would tell her to kiss my butt too.

J&A2008

I went to this route a few years ago.  When she's in contact with us, I do email her some candid shots of the boys from time to time, but I'm not paying for pictures for her.

twister22

I'm with you, BM can pay her own way.

Cheerilee

We give BM a 5x7 of SS's school picture in an inexpensive frame every year at Christmas along with some homemade craft as his gift to her.  Otherwise, DH texts her a candid now and then.

Moschic31

Cheerilee:

We give BM a 5x7 of SS's school picture in an inexpensive frame every year at Christmas along with some homemade craft as his gift to her.  Otherwise, DH texts her a candid now and then.

I like this idea!  I agree with other posters, if she wants photos to send to her family, she can purchase them.  We all know kids take school pictures every year.  She can contact the school to get package information or even the photographer. They usually keep the pics on file for a little while in case parents want to order more.

 

Littlejen22

Cheerilee:

We give BM a 5x7 of SS's school picture in an inexpensive frame every year at Christmas along with some homemade craft as his gift to her. nbsp;Otherwise, DH texts her a candid now and then.

We used to give BM and her mother a photo and wallet and that was it. Honestly that was for SD, if she could not bother being part of SDs life and saving enough money for a plane ticket in 3 years, which at the time Southwest was 99 or less if bought as soon as released, then she would not bother paying for a photo. We would not have paid more to get her photos.

You are totally fine doing what you did. If she Ives the kids a hard time ten scan it and send her one scanned copy so she can leave the kids alone.

Cheerilee

Littlejen22:

Honestly that was for SD, if she could not bother being part of SDs life and saving enough money for a plane ticket in 3 years, which at the time Southwest was 99 or less if bought as soon as released, then she would not bother paying for a photo. We would not have paid more to get her photos.

We do it because it keeps BM appeased so she doesn't bother us (too much).  She's gotten 3 big life insurance settlements in the past 2 years and not once has she used any of the money to come see SS, pay child support, send any sort of gifts for any occasion.  We had even offered her a place to stay if she wanted to come visit him.  She has taken 2 vacations, bought new furniture, and bought a ton of designer clothing, though.  She's a peach.