If you suddenly became wealthy...

tarebear9891

How would you handle your kids? Would they get a hefty allowance? Would they still have chores? Or would you spoil them rotten?

I think most people believe they would still try to instill a work ethic it ends up that there kids learn to manipulate and get a fat allowance.

ABColeslaw

I know a lot of kids who grew up in wealthy families and did not get an allowance unless they earned it.  I knew a girl in college whose wealthy parents would only pay for her books and T pass if she came home once or twice a month to help her mother do a deep cleaning of the house or whatever else needed to be done.  Seriously, she had a nice car though.  But she wasn't spoiled or entitled.  She did work study like everyone else and never asked her parents to bail her out.  She had other perks, on school breaks she went on some pretty sweet vacays and she tended to wear nice clothes, but she didn't have more spending money than the rest of us. 

kllrbnny

Right now I would rather spend spare money on the kids than on myself and I can't see that changing no matter how much we had. I'm not saying I would go crazy, and allowances would still be proportional to the work they do to get them. It sure would be able to say 'yes' a lot more than I'm able to. It would be more about the experiences though. Family vacations, concerts, movies, even simple things like getting ice cream & going out to eat. The focus would be less on stuff for sure.

stilts1

I would raise my child the exact same way if I was rich or poor.  They will be expected to be an active member of our household. (i.e. do the laundry, dishes, clean room)  They will be getting jobs when they are 16 and paying for their own cars. (we may do a match-whatever-you-put-down type of thing).  But I think you get the picture.  I intend to teach my kids the value of a dollar.  There's no shame in that.

theseaword

I think I would spoil in some ways, but not others. I would make certain he had the best education, we would travel, and I'd likely indulge him in extracurriculars/hobbies. But I think I would still have an allowance system tied to grades and chores that he would put towards more material things, like clothes or game systems or whatever.

andyyougoonie

I grew up in a family that would probably be considered wealthy.  I never really knew that we were though.  I got the low end of allowance compared to my friends.  I got a much less expensive car than the rest of my friends (but I did get a car when I was 16).  I went to private school, but not one of the elite private schools in town.  We rarely ate out and if we did, I wasn't allowed to order soda or juice.

I would probably do a lot of those same things.  I was also taught the value of a dollar very early on.  I don't know how my parents did that so well with me, because they were not so successful with my older brother and sister. lol.  A lot of it depends on the kid, but DD will be doing chores and earning allowance.

ShellShockedMama

ABColeslaw:

I know a lot of kids who grew up in wealthy families and did not get an allowance unless they earned it.nbsp; I knew a girl in college whose wealthy parents would only pay for her books and T pass if she came home once or twice a month to help her mother do a deep cleaning of the house or whatever else needed to be done.nbsp; Seriously, she had a nice car though.nbsp; But she wasn't spoiled or entitled.nbsp; She did work study like everyone else and never asked her parents to bail her out.nbsp; She had other perks, on school breaks she went on some pretty sweet vacays and she tended to wear nice clothes, but she didn't have more spending money than the rest of us.nbsp;

I would hope to be as good a parent as this example.

Venus04d

As far as travel/exposure to different cultures, educational opportunities, and extracurriculars go - I would give them the best. I would want them to get to experience all kinds of things I wish I could have seen.

As far as clothes, "fun" money, entertainment, cars, etc. I would want them to have nice stuff, but they would have chores. I'd also require they either do community service, an internship, or a part time job along with working hard in school.

penguingrrl

I'm not sure. Neither DH nor I ever had an allowance, so I'm not sure I will ever give an allowance. If we wanted pocket money we had to work outside the home for it. We both had jobs we were expected to do at home, but we weren't paid for those. I have a feeling we'll have the same rules. Our chores included our own laundry, watching my younger brother (DH is the youngest, so he didn't do that), cooking dinner some nights, setting and clearing the table and doing dishes, and helping clean the house. I expect my kids to do those things without "pay" for them.

But I have a feeling if I were wealthy my kids would have a lot more "stuff" than I had. I'd be more generous about buying clothing (my mom was tight, so I bought most of my own from my paycheck from a p/t job) and I'm sure they'd have the latest, coolest gadgets. And they would likely get a non-fancy but new or newer car instead of the beater I drove at 17. But that would be for my own peace of mind regarding their safety.

kcisthebombdotcom

Considering that the overwhelming majority of people who inherit wealth don't pass it on to the next generation, it's true that people theoretically say they'd want to instill a work ethic but just end up giving them whatever.

To answer the question of what I would do, I would definitely buy them nice things and spoil them to a degree, but if they behaved poorly/didn't try in school they would lose those privileges. I would want them to do well in school/help around the house. In terms of trust funds, I would also wait until 30+ with specific rules before giving them large amounts of cash.

[Deleted User]

ABColeslaw:

I know a lot of kids who grew up in wealthy families and did not get an allowance unless they earned it.  I knew a girl in college whose wealthy parents would only pay for her books and T pass if she came home once or twice a month to help her mother do a deep cleaning of the house or whatever else needed to be done.  Seriously, she had a nice car though.  But she wasn't spoiled or entitled.  She did work study like everyone else and never asked her parents to bail her out.  She had other perks, on school breaks she went on some pretty sweet vacays and she tended to wear nice clothes, but she didn't have more spending money than the rest of us. 

I'm assuming they paid her tuition, though?

ktshoff

ABColeslaw:

I know a lot of kids who grew up in wealthy families and did not get an allowance unless they earned it.  I knew a girl in college whose wealthy parents would only pay for her books and T pass if she came home once or twice a month to help her mother do a deep cleaning of the house or whatever else needed to be done.  Seriously, she had a nice car though.  But she wasn't spoiled or entitled.  She did work study like everyone else and never asked her parents to bail her out.  She had other perks, on school breaks she went on some pretty sweet vacays and she tended to wear nice clothes, but she didn't have more spending money than the rest of us. 

Yep, this!

ATMmom324

kllrbnny:

Right now I would rather spend spare money on the kids than on myself and I can't see that changing no matter how much we had. I'm not saying I would go crazy, and allowances would still be proportional to the work they do to get them. It sure would be able to say 'yes' a lot more than I'm able to. It would be more about the experiences though. Family vacations, concerts, movies, even simple things like getting ice cream & going out to eat. The focus would be less on stuff for sure.

 

This is how I would be.  I would love to be  fortunate enough to take my kids traveling the world.  Give them experiences that I could never afford now.  I see no better way to learn appreciation then to go volunteer as a family in a third world country for a month or donate time and resources to charities.

FrickandFrack

stilts1:

I would raise my child the exact same way if I was rich or poor.nbsp; They will be expected to be an active member of our household. i.e. do the laundry, dishes, clean roomnbsp; They will be getting jobs when they are 16 and paying for their own cars. we may do a matchwhateveryouputdown type of thing.nbsp; But I think you get the picture.nbsp; I intend to teach my kids the value of a dollar.nbsp; There's no shame in that.

This would be me also.

nanabanana06

My kids would still have to do chores and work for their allowance. They may get a little more than the norm allowance wise and I already spoil my kids. I just wouldn't want to create more versions of myself. I also would be sending them to a fancy prep school that I am seriously in love with, just am not rich enough to send her there.