Can we vent a bit?

bearfootz

Here's my "I'm going to feel sorry for myself" vent of the day to get if off my chest since I can't do it in real life.  You ladies should feel free to add your own vent to this thread because as I was informed last night the world does not, supposedly, revolve around me.

I'm ticked that my body does not do what it should be programmed to do as a female, ie, ovulate and produce breast milk.  Obviously since I'm TTC I'm a little more irritated with the ovulation aspect of that sentence at this current moment.  Why can't I just pull the goalie and act all surprised when I get pregnant like so many people I know do?  Or drink a bottle of wine, have drunken sex, and get knocked up?  Because that's how it should work.  But no.  My f'ed up hormones do not allow for that so now we're back to popping fertility meds and having sex on command.  I also get the pleasure of peeing in cups and waiting to see lines on sticks. And of course with possible ovulation this week it would be the week that DH gets a cold and has zero interest so I have to find a balance of charming him without flat out raping him.  The whole time wondering if this drug is going to work or if it's back to RE where he'll suggest a shot in the arse and an IUI.  And then having the stress of how much this is going to cost just to get pregnant  and will it work while also worrying about how we're going handle having a 3rd kid, but not wanting to seem like I'm unsure for fear that then I'll never get pregnant.  I'm seriously more nervous about having a third child than I was to have the first though. I just want it to be easier. 

Ok, there's my vent. DH doesn't need to hear it and no one IRL knows we're trying. We're very lucky in that the help we needed to get pregnant the first time was far less than what a lot of women go through and we're very blessed to have the two children that we have.  But I still needed to get that off my chest.

Now vent away.

Libby1978

I'm so sorry you're going through this lady!   I hate to hear about anyone having fertility problems.  It's really unfair. 

 

CoffeeBeen

Vent away.  That's an incredibly frustrating, unfair situation.  I'll be crossing my fingers for you guys.

MomlovesEloise

Libby1978:

I'm so sorry you're going through this lady!   I hate to hear about anyone having fertility problems.  It's really unfair. 

 

This exactly. I'm so sorry you're going through all of this.  

bearfootz

Thanks ladies.  I know, I could have put this on TTTC or elsewhere.  But it is probably insensitive to complain about getting pregnant when I already have two kids to women who are still trying for their first.  But I think you guys understand when you want more, that dissappointment is still there. 

I'll try to be a little more chipper.  Just had to get that off my chest.

andyyougoonie

I'm so sorry.  We're TTC too and I hate it. I can't even talk to H about it because he just wants to think we have an easy time getting pregnant.  Well guess what?  We don't.  I do all the temping, testing, baby Asprin, etc.  Most of my friends stop BCP and are pregnant the next month.  My SIL gets KU if she just forgets one pill during her cycle.

I don't know. I know we've been lucky to not require more intervention when getting preg the first time, but every single month sucks.  Every AF is like a punch in the gut - whether it's cycle #2 or #10. 

Lots of ovulation & pregnancy wishes sent your way!

stilts1

Infertility sucks.  I remember the helpless feeling as I watched all my friends get pregnant while we were struggling.  It's a very personal battle that's hard to understand unless you've been through it.  I'm sorry

bearfootz

andyyougoonie:

I'm so sorry.  We're TTC too and I hate it. I can't even talk to H about it because he just wants to think we have an easy time getting pregnant.  Well guess what?  We don't.  I do all the temping, testing, baby Asprin, etc.  Most of my friends stop BCP and are pregnant the next month.  My SIL gets KU if she just forgets one pill during her cycle.

I don't know. I know we've been lucky to not require more intervention when getting preg the first time, but every single month sucks.  Every AF is like a punch in the gut - whether it's cycle #2 or #10. 

Lots of ovulation & pregnancy wishes sent your way!

This is so similar.  When we decided to go for #3 DH wanted to just see what happens.  I was worried about m/c risk with pcos so went straight to RE who said he doubted I'd ovulate on my own even after losing some weight.  I actually considered pretending I hadn't seen RE so that DH could be surprised.  Let's be realistic, with 3 year old twins the sex having doesn't just happen every other day and if we're spending money on meds he needs to know that he can't pass it up just because he's tired. 

I feel bad complaining because we were so lucky to get pregnant on the first IUI last time.  I just keep flashing back to the first time we were ttc and remembering how scary it was to not know if/when it would happen. 

Thanks for the responses ladies.  Nice to know I'm not just being a whiner.