Natural Birth

Advice on Backup Coach

Hi - I plan on attending Bradley classes starting in a couple months.  My husband works a lot and has a 7 on, 7 off schedule.  He will probably miss 6 of the 12 classes, which worries me.  The instructor said I should probably have a backup coach for this reason and also because the hubs is already freaking out at 13 weeks.

My problem is that the family members that live nearby are not very supportive and are more drama then help.  All my best friends and supportive family members live out of state.  I have considered a coworker that I am close with who is a nurse and seems very interested in the possibility.  She is also a very positive and encouraging person.

What advise do you have?  Would you rather have a backup that is a coworker and friend or take your chances with your scared husband who only attended 1/2 of the classes?  Help!

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Re: Advice on Backup Coach

  • Missing 6 classes will put him at a major disadvantage as a Bradley coach specifically, but he might do perfectly well regardless.  Were it me, I'd have a secondary coach who is someone you're close to and would be happy to have there.  Or hire a doula.  Your Bradley coach might know some newer doulas who are low cost or free, if the fee is a problem.
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  • I'm probably being Captain Obvious and I bet you already have, but talk to your husband.  I wouldn't bring anyone else on board unless I knew he wanted/was comfortable with another person there.  I'd also talk to him about the "freaking out"--I think it's more important to understand what he's dealing with at this stage and find a solution if possible than it is to get the back-up lined up, since he might just need a little extra hand-holding or research/info (depending on his personality) early on.
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  • I wouldn't do Bradley if my husband wasn't able to be there.

    I'd just get a doula and call it a day.

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