...then how will they let me adopt a baby?
There is no baby in our near future, as I've already shared. Adoption is NOT on the table at this time because we are broke from treatments that have failed us miserably. So what does one do in my situation? Well, we decided it was finally time to get a 2nd dog again.
I protested for a really long time because I wanted it to be something my child experienced, but there's no reason for us to hold off now that we are childless possibly permanently. I found one I fell in love with online, and I sent in the application. I just found out on Thursday they have denied us because we previously re-homed a dog.
I'll admit we made a lot of mistakes, but we did it with the best intentions. We adopted a dog from a rescue that was about a year old, knowing he was going to be a challenge. We had no idea what his past looked like. He was dropped off overnight, and we knew nothing about his previous owners. Things were actually going pretty well until we decided to move in with my parents so we could transition into a new life cross country.
Our dogs went from having full run of our house and yard, to my husband, them, and I crammed into my childhood bedroom. In addition, my brother's beagle was living at the house, and she was extremely territorial. The living situation provoked some bad aggression issues in the rescue dog, and DH's stepdad offered to come to our rescue and take him in until we moved so the fighting would stop.
What we didn't expect was for him to fall in love with our dog. And due to our dog's unknown past, it really started to appear he thrived a lot better as the only dog. Those 2 went everywhere together, and when it came time to move...we thought it was kinder to leave the dog with the stepdad in the new life they had created with each other.
So yes, we re-homed a dog. I guess that makes us horrible people who are unworthy and incapable of ever showing love to another animal on a permanent basis. I guess the fact that we have a permanent new home and yard and take our dog everywhere with us makes us a horrible candidate. I can't even tell you how much this rejection hurts.
I begged the rescue to give us a 2nd chance. I'm pretty sure she's just deleting my emails at this point. I sent a message to the woman that is fostering the mother dog and the puppies. She has not responded back. We are not repeat dog re-homers. It happened once because we took on a dog with a past. And even then, we only permanently re-homed him because it seemed more fair than uprooting him again. The whole reason we are looking to adopt a puppy is because it won't have a past. We can start fresh and train it to be loving and obedient the way our first dog is.
So if it is THIS DANG HARD to adopt a puppy...I don't think I should ever consider adopting a baby.
Re: If they won't even let me adopt a dog...
Countless BFN(s)
Moving to IVF
IVF1 (ICSI): Long Lupron
6R. 3F. 3DT. 8Cell 1Grade 2Embies. 1Frostie.
Beta 1/22: 14 Beta 1/24: 24 Beta 1/26: 28
Round One Result: Chemical Pregnancy
Pressing Forward
IVF2 (ICSI/AH/ACU): Microdose Lupron Flare
13R. 11F. 5DT. 2TFR'ed. 1Frostie.
Round Two Result 4/30: Harsh BFN
FET. 2TFR'ed.
Round Three Result 6/25: BFN
Where do we go from here?
Moving forward with CCRM in 2013
ODWU revealed blocked tube(s). Lap 2/15.
Bilateral Tubal Ligation. Stage IV Endo.
Finally some (tough) answers.
IVF3 (ICSI/CCS): Antagonist with EPP
13R. We have 3 CCS Normal Embryos!
Lupron Depot: May 2013 to August 2013
Long awaited FET on 9/3. 2TFR'ed.
BFP on FRER 5dp5dt: IN SHOCK!
Beta1 9/10: 152.7! Beta2 9/12: 378! Beta3 9/14: 1224!
1st ultrasound 10/1: TWO beautiful heartbeats! Overjoyed!
I know, it's crazy. I will say that I understand the rescues wanting to protect the interest of the animals. I don't want them to bounce from one home to another feeling confused and unloved either. But I also think it's unfair to close the door on us because we made a one-time choice to re-home our dog, especially when we did it in a way that worked out way better for him in the long run. It felt like a foster situation to me in a lot of ways. We removed him from a life in a cage, and we trained him to be way more obedient than his previous owners did. We loved him and took care of him, and then we gave him to a family member he knew who continued to love him and take care of him and make him their everything. We didn't make him go back to life in a cage. We didn't give him to some scary stranger. We didn't boot him out on the street to fend for himself. Yet...we suck according to this shelter.
IVF #1 w ICSI in July 2010 = BFN
IVF #2.1 in Oct 2010 converted to IUI = BFN
IVF #2.2 w ICSI in Dec 2010 = BFN
Met with new RE in new city on 1/31/11.
IVF #3 w ICSI in April 2011. HPT on 5/9 = BFP!
Beta #1 on 5/10 (10dp5dt) = 99.4. Beta #2 on 5/12 = 284. First u/s on 5/26. = Fraternal TWINS!
Twin boys born & lost on 8/16/11 at 18w1d due to PPROM & preterm labor.
IVF #4.1 in Jan 2012 converted to IUI on 1/7/12 = BFN
IVF #4.2 w ICSI in Feb 2012. Lupron on 2/10. Stims on 2/18. ER on 2/29- 7R,6F
ET scheduled for 3/5/12- nothing to transfer
Dh seeing new MFI uro & Dh starting meds- June 2012.
IVF #5 in Dec 2012 = BFFN.
IVF #6 planned for Spring 2013. Praying for our take home baby/ies.
**P/SAIF and P/SAL always welcome!**
And remember, dogs are different than children. Try not to let this discourage you while you rebuild your financial situation ((((hugs))))
Positive for HLA-B27, I'm a mutant
Testing - Me ok, gluten issue? DH - borderline count, low motility
4/28/11 IUI#1 = BFP!(5/25), EDD 2/2/12 - m/c 5w3d
7/3, 7/31, 9/25 - IUI#2-4=BFN
IVF#1 - 1 blast = BFP!! (12/30), EDD 9/9/12, confirmed c/p 4w2d
FET#1 3/2/12 - 2 blasts =BFP!! EDD 11/18/12, us#1 = twins! Confirmed m/c 5w6d
4/20-surprise BFP and another c/p 4w2d
FET#2 7/16/12 - 2 blasts = BFN
FET#3 8/20/12 - 1 blast - BFP!! Beta #1-2=177, 354
1st u/s 5w6d, one beautiful little HB
baby girl born 5/10/13
TTC#2 since 12/17/2014, Cycle 8
Repeat Testing...FSH=12, AMH=3.8, AFC=28.
IUI#5 5/10/15- c/p?
IVF#2 8/19/15 - cancelled due to cysts
IVF#2 take two 10/2015 - 5 blasts frozen
FET#4 12/11/2015 - BFN - 4 blasts remaining
FET#5 2/18/16 - BFP!!! Beta1-3, 126, 250, 745!!
Tons of love and ((hugs)) to my IF sister NMscubagirl