IVF, "Over Due" & Discouraged

Toni79

I'm officially 41 weeks pregnant today, and am eagerly waiting to meet my LO!  I've waited so long for this!

Anyway, I plan on having a natural birth at a hospital with a midwife (MW).  There are actually 2 MWs in the practice.  Several weeks ago one of them told me that IVF babies tend to come early.  Something to do with the placenta "breaking down" sooner (my words not hers).  I didn't really ask too many questions at the time, because in my mind I always had a feeling I'd go "late".  Since most FTMs do go late.

I have an MW appointment tomorrow.  Since I haven't gone into labor yet she's ordering a non-stress test (utra sound to measure amniotic fluid, external fetal heart monitor, etc).  As long as everyting is fine, she'll let me go a little longer on my own.  But I know the closer I get to 42 weeks, the more serious the "induction" conversation gets.  But I'm also worried that the non-stress tests might find something, and we'll have to have the induction conversation sooner than later!

Per my MWs instructions I've been drinking my red raspberry leaf tea every day since 35 weeks. 

I've been trying to get labor started . . . For the past 7 days:  I've had sex every day and have been walking alot every day.  The last few days I've added a few other natural techniques.  Last Thursday I had a prenatal message where my therapist showed me some accupressure points to induce labor.  DH and I have done one message session on our own at home.  Last night I even tried some nipple stimulation, for about 45 minutes.  I'm not sure I was doing it right.  It just seemed weird to me, I don't really "enjoy" my nipples being "played with".  Maybe I just need to do all these things more!?!?!?

Anyone have any other suggestions to try?  I've thought about castor oil?  But I'll need to talk to my MW about that tomorrow.

Also, I'm starting to get discouraged.  I've prepaired myself for the last 40+ weeks to "trust my body" so I can have a natural birth.  I've been able to put my discouragements from IVF behind me.  But the past few days they are all coming back to me.  My body  couldn't get pregnant on its own, maybe it won't be able to birth on its own either.  I know it doesn't "work" that way, but I can't help thinking about that!

Sorry so long.

TIA!

sbevmc09

First, ((hugs))

Try not to get discouraged.  My last pregnancy the doctors kept telling me I'd go early (despite being a FTM) because DS was sitting so low.  Because of that, as soon as I hit 40 weeks the days were agony!  I felt like I was going to be the only woman pregnant forevah!  I went into labor on my own right at 41 weeks  

Doing a NST to check on things is extremely common.  Chances are everything will be just fine and you'll get the reassurance that they looked in on things and all still looks good.  The vast majority of women will go into labor on their own by 42 weeks.  And I don't know where you're at as far as dilation and effacement (or if they've checked you), but keep in mind that's not a great predictor of when you'll go into labor.  It could happen anytime.  

Something else I didn't see you mention, have they tried stripping your membranes yet?  If it's something you're comfortable with it's pretty common that they will try this to jump start labor.  I'm not sure how effective it is overall, but they tried it at my 40 week appointment (it didn't work).  

Toni79

Thanks for your kind words.

I've had a few cervical exams (just for my own curiosity).  My MW gives me the option.  I know they don't really mean a whole lot.  Last week I was about 1 cm dialated.  My cervix was still very high, but my MW said it was getting soft.  I'm sure she'll want to check me again tomorrow. 

As far as having my membranes stripped.  I was thinking about this yesterday.  I had to re-read my notes on this from my Bradley class.  I think at this point the pros might outweight the cons.  I'm curious if my MW will bring this up tomorrow.  I have a feeling she might. 

badbridey

Don't get discouraged... a lot can happen in a week.  I think the feelings you're having are very natural.  I gave birth at 41 weeks, 3 days...and those last three days were filled with lots of doubt and discouragement.

We tried pretty much all of the methods you mentioned to try to get LO to come on time, but I'm not sure any of them worked. I think she ultimately had to come in her own timing.  I would just keep on with everything you're doing to get your body ready.  We debated whether to try castor oil, but ultimately decided against it, since it can cause dehydration and I really didn't want to deal with the other effects. 

LO did come on her own, but by that time I had already made my peace with having an induction - after all, the real goal is to have a healthy baby and at some point the risk of having an induction outweighs the risk of waiting for her to come in her own time.

The only thing I would suggest is to make sure you are drinking A LOT of water.  One of my NSTs showed that my fluid levels had decreased to 6 (5 and below is considered too low) and my doctor wanted to induce because of that.  After doing research online and talking to our Bradley instructor...we decided to up my water intake and do another NST the next day.  My fluid level went up to 7...not a huge increase, but my fluid levels stayed even after increasing my water intake.

mystrana

Let me add to the chorus - don't be discouraged! Also, don't try the castor oil as I've heard that's not helpful and can really cause bad dehydration.

But don't think that your body won't be able to handle giving birth based only on your experiences trying to get pregnant. Though the two events are closely related, they are not the same and I believe you can handle it.

One of my friends very recently gave birth and was overdue by a week so I saw how absolutely frustrating it is to wait. Good luck!

 

caralck

As an ivf person myself, I know how you feel about wanting to do something without needing medical intervention.  The nst/bpp at 41 wks is normal and I was going to have that myself but went into labor a few days after the due date.  Unfortunately ended up with a c-section but made it to 8 cm before finally needing to use interventions.  While it may feel like a let down to need an induction, hopefully you can still get the delivery you want.  While I have to concede that my body can't get a baby in there and apparently won't let one out either, it was fully capable of growing a perfectly healthy baby girl and in the end, that's all that was important.  Good luck!

 

Oh and try some evening primrose oil.  I took it orally at bedtime but you can also use it vaginally. 

robyn2201

Try not to get discouraged! It's completely normal for a FTM to go a week past her EDD. How did your appointment go today?

Toni79

sweettalkin417:

Try not to get discouraged! It's completely normal for a FTM to go a week past her EDD. How did your appointment go today?

 

Ug . . . So I'm officially 8 days past my due date!  (41 weeks 1 day) 
 
I saw my midwife today and she can "stretch" me to 2 cm (which is oh so comfortable!).  She had me go get an ultrasound (to measure baby's size, measure amniotic fluid level, and confirm heart, lungs, placenta, etc still were functioning as normal).  She also had me get a non-stress test done, where basically I was hooked up to the external fetal monitor for an hour to make sure baby's heart rate was ok. 
 
If anything came back abnormal, they would have wanted to induce me today.  But thankfully everything was normal!  So that buys me a few more days.  BTW - They are estimating baby at 9 lbs!  Yeah! 
 
If I still haven't gone into labor by Friday, I go back for another non-stress test.  And if everything is still ok, that will buy me another few days.
 
Unfortunately, they won't let me go past 42 weeks.  They actually want the baby out before I hit 42 weeks.  So if I haven't gone into "spontaneous labor" by Sunday night (41 weeks 5 days), I have to be induced, and would likely deliver Monday (41 weeks 6 days).     
 
To say the least, I'm not thrilled to be having the induction talk with my midwife (although I know if I was still with my old OB they would have induced me by now - probably without the extra testing).  If I do have to be induced, I'm afraid the rest of my birth plan will go down the drain! 
 
Thankfully she doesn't want to start induction with Pitocin.  She'll want to start with a prostaglandin gel (suppository).  Apparently the gel induces labor gradually, and you have the time get used to the contractions building up (like you normally would).  Unlike Pitocin which essentially just skips over the build up and takes you directly to the stronger contractions from hell.  She said, if I respond well to the gel, I wouldn't need Pitocin, and could go on without any other interventions/drugs.  But that also means, if I don't respond well to the gel, then I would need Pitocin, and I know what that can led to!  So I am thankful that she would want to take the induction slowly.
 
Now that there is a true deadline on things, I'm really feeling the pressure.  I really only have a few more days to get things rolling on its own ... 4 days ... yes I'm counting!  I'm trying to convince myself not to think about it, but its hard not to.
 
Looks like tomorrow I'll be walking laps in Target.  I'm running out of big (air conditioned) stores to walk laps in!
 
Anyway, keep your fingers crossed that I wake up in the next few nights in labor!