I feel like such a bad mommy...
NewlyWeds13
member
I am 35.5 weeks pregnant and have a 26 month old.
I love my son with my whole heart and he is a great little guy, but my patience with him is just shot. I am not sure if it is because I am pregnant, just me or what... but I am at my wit's end with his bedtime battles (started when I had to move him to a bed as he was jumping out of his crib and saying no crib for babies and refused to stay in it). Prior to this, we were spoiled and he slept 7:30 PM-7 AM since 5 months with literally about 2 or 3 nights that he was sick that he awoke ever. he also consistently took 2 to 3 hour naps a day.
Since the bed conversion he takes naps every few days, and bedtime takes 2 hours to get him to go down (once in bed, knock on wood, he has been staying, but is now awake at 5:40 every day).
I work full time as does my husband and honestly it is not the sleep that bothers me... it is having to sit in his bed, cox him to sleep for almost 2 hours, etc... I find that I am just burnt out after doing it. I find it more stressful than my stressful full time job or having a newborn or any other challenge I have had.
I am getting to the point that I just hope for hte next day to come so I can be over it.... I am not depressed or upset-- but I am not really enjoying much time with my son either.
I feel like such a crappy person for even admitting this... but I am not really even sure what to do about it. I am hoping it is just a phase, but I have been feeling this this every few days for about 2 months. I snap out of it, but then it happens again.
Anyone else stuggling being the parent of a toddler?
Re: I feel like such a bad mommy...
I have tried everything... locked him in the room with a gate (he stood and called for us for hours, sat and played and eventually slept but for only 4 hours all night)-- we did that for 5 or 6 days and I became scared he would get sick from getting too little sleep.
I have tried creating a sticker chart where he gets a sticker if he stays in bed and goes to sleep and gets a toy after 5 stickers... does not care.
The only way I have gotten him to sleep for a full overnight is to stay in the room with him (not talking at all)... where he just flips and turns and talks to himself for literally 2 hours. He tries to engage with me for about 30 minutes and I tell him that it is not talking, it is sleeping time. I have tried to leave and offer this and then he gets out of bed.
So I have resorted to just sitting there for the 2 hours it takes for him to fall asleep.
He also will not tolerate anyone other than me doing it (my husband tried it 2 nights ago and he tossed and turned for 4 hours before going to sleep for only 2).
Pretty much every thing I have tried from locking him in, to incentive/rewards, to preparing him, etc is not working.
Have you tried leaving and coming back? That's what works with my DD. I put her in bed, stay for a bit to talk to her about the day or about tomorrow, then I say something like, "I need to use the bathroom, I'll be right back." or "I need to check on Noah (our cat). I'll be right back." Within a few minutes she's out.
We have a fan going plus her sound machine. Lately she has been getting scared so we invested in this night light that goes into bed with her. She especially likes it because she picked it out from the other choices. That has helped a ton!
Good luck!
I feel for you! That would be so frustrating. I know when my son first switched to a bed from the crib and realized he could get out, I just put up the baby gate so he couldn't leave the room and went downstairs. i had a monitor so I could hear if anything was really wrong but for a while it took him a while to fall asleep. For many months he would get out of bed, sit by the gate with his pillow and toys/books and entertain himself until he fell asleep. I found and still find that even when he asks me to stay in his room, he won't settle down. I definitely can't talk to him even to say "go to sleep."
If you are feeling really frustrated, maybe it's time to just let him not get a ton of sleep and keep naps short and see if that resets his ability to fall asleep. I think he just wants to spend the time with you so doesn't want to settle down. if you are out of the equation (so to speak) you can both get some rest.
Good luck! Hope it helps!
Maybe he's not tired? Have you tried letting him stay up later and letting him get a little more energy out? If he sleeps from say, 9pm-7am and takes a 2 hour nap, he's still getting enough sleep. Of course, you get less alone time in the evening, but it might be worth it if he goes to sleep more easily at a later time. My DD is 28 months old and stays up way later than I'd like (she's usually asleep by 11pm and sleeps until about 8:30am and takes a 2-3 hour nap), but it's what works for us.
I'm sorry--I hope things get better soon!