Short Vent — The Bump
Adoption

Short Vent

Grr, I just found out my company provides short term disability for women after they give birth.  Up to 13 weeks of 100% pay...but with adoption, the only thing they offer is job security for up to 12 weeks UNPAID...that seems so unfair, but I don't see how I could fight it.  It is how the law works..but very frustrating! Sad
Married Since 09/2006, TTC Since 09/2010 
DX: Unexplained infertility, DH normal 
3 Femara cycles - Oct, Nov, Dec 2011, all BFNs 
IVF #1, ER 2/15 (5R, 4M, 4F), ET 2/18, Beta 2/29 = BFN :( 
Follistim + IUI on 6/25 = BFN 
Home Study Finalized 8/14/12! Profile Active - 8/17/12! 
Officially Matched 8/29/12, Our perfect angel born 9/25/12! 
Biggest surprise ever, unexpected BFP on 4/12/13! 

 Our Angel through Adoption
 Lilypie Third Birthday tickers


Our Little Miracle
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Re: Short Vent

  • That is really really crappy!!!! :(
    Married on 3.20.2004. It took 30 month, 2 failed adoptions and IVF for our first miracle. We have had 9 foster kids since he was born and started the domestic adoption process when he was 10 month old, we had 4 failed matches in that time. After our daughter was born we brought her home and spent 2 weeks fearing we might lose her because of complications that came up. But Praise God all went through and she is ours forever! Expecting again after IVF Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • It is pretty crappy.  The only way I can feel better about it is to remember that short-term disability is for medical disability only - such as giving birth.  Dads (birth or otherwise) don't qualify for STD either. :-(  I do wish more companies had adoption leave (paid, or even unpaid).  It would really help to normalize things a bit.
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  • That is frustrating.

    Is there any way you can lobby them to reconsider their policy to provide even some paid leave for adoptive parents? it might be worth it to present something to HR.

  • image Dr.Loretta:

    That is frustrating.

    Is there any way you can lobby them to reconsider their policy to provide even some paid leave for adoptive parents? it might be worth it to present something to HR.

    I thought about it, but short term disability is focused on you having a physical condition, so that's why it isn't offered with adoption.  I don't think I have the energy.  The ironic thing is, my CEO and his wife adopted twice recently so they might have compassion, but again, I'm not sure I want to fight it..

    Married Since 09/2006, TTC Since 09/2010 
    DX: Unexplained infertility, DH normal 
    3 Femara cycles - Oct, Nov, Dec 2011, all BFNs 
    IVF #1, ER 2/15 (5R, 4M, 4F), ET 2/18, Beta 2/29 = BFN :( 
    Follistim + IUI on 6/25 = BFN 
    Home Study Finalized 8/14/12! Profile Active - 8/17/12! 
    Officially Matched 8/29/12, Our perfect angel born 9/25/12! 
    Biggest surprise ever, unexpected BFP on 4/12/13! 

     Our Angel through Adoption
     Lilypie Third Birthday tickers


    Our Little Miracle
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    image
  • It might be worth it at some point in the future. My company had a policy where you got I think 2 weeks paid whether you adopted or gave birth, so your first 2 weeks of FMLA were full pay. After that there was a state-sponsored payroll tax that went toward a small check for another 6 weeks, I want to say. The rest was unpaid, but at least it took the edge off.

    Poor DH. His company has a great adoption reimbursement program, but zero paternity leave for anyone. He had to take PTO to hang out with DD.

  • I just found out the same thing last week at my company.  I'm so frustrated and upset that it's just another reminder of being different.  Wish it wasn't the case!

    TTC since March 2010, BFP #1 11.09.10, ectopic, m/c 12.14.10 (10w)
    Clomid + TI=BFN, IUIs 1-6= BFN
    Application for domestic adoption submitted 4/18/12, matched 8/12/12, DD born 10/31/12


     

  • IRRIRR
    Seventh Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its Photogenic
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    That stinks.  Is everyone sure Short term disability doesn't apply to caring for a newborn?
    image

    Failed Matches - December 2012, May 2013, December 2013
    Moved on to  gestational surrogacy with a family friend who is our angel and due 7/23/15


  • image IRR:
    That stinks.  Is everyone sure Short term disability doesn't apply to caring for a newborn?

    It may be different state to state, but in North Carolina, adoptive parents receive FMLA (12 days UNPAID time off with no risk of job loss), but not short term disability as short term disability applies only to a physical medical condition.  It is obviously very unfair since a normal healthy pregnancy requires 2 nights in the hospital, yet they get a minimum of 6 weeks PAID time off, but oh well.  I did talk to HR again about it and there is no legal requirement to provide anything and our parent company doesn't, so they are not going to establish a new policy like I'd hoped.

    Married Since 09/2006, TTC Since 09/2010 
    DX: Unexplained infertility, DH normal 
    3 Femara cycles - Oct, Nov, Dec 2011, all BFNs 
    IVF #1, ER 2/15 (5R, 4M, 4F), ET 2/18, Beta 2/29 = BFN :( 
    Follistim + IUI on 6/25 = BFN 
    Home Study Finalized 8/14/12! Profile Active - 8/17/12! 
    Officially Matched 8/29/12, Our perfect angel born 9/25/12! 
    Biggest surprise ever, unexpected BFP on 4/12/13! 

     Our Angel through Adoption
     Lilypie Third Birthday tickers


    Our Little Miracle
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    image
  • IRRIRR
    Seventh Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its Photogenic
    member
    My husband and I will be screwed since we know we need to be out of state for at least two weeks.  Whatever, we will make it work somehow.  I guess everyone else does.
    image

    Failed Matches - December 2012, May 2013, December 2013
    Moved on to  gestational surrogacy with a family friend who is our angel and due 7/23/15


  • When I adopted my son I was able to get FMLA.  FMLA is paid thru your PTO.  This is a federal right, so you should be able to get it.  Check into it. Good Luck.  BTW I got up to 12 weeks to use however I wanted throughout the year.
  • image mommytoconnor:
    When I adopted my son I was able to get FMLA.  FMLA is paid thru your PTO.  This is a federal right, so you should be able to get it.  Check into it. Good Luck.  BTW I got up to 12 weeks to use however I wanted throughout the year.

    FMLA is unpaid time off according to NC State Law..not sure if it's different in your state. I can use unused PTO but I only get 15 of those a year and depending on what else I've used them for, it won't be much.  Thank you though! 

    Married Since 09/2006, TTC Since 09/2010 
    DX: Unexplained infertility, DH normal 
    3 Femara cycles - Oct, Nov, Dec 2011, all BFNs 
    IVF #1, ER 2/15 (5R, 4M, 4F), ET 2/18, Beta 2/29 = BFN :( 
    Follistim + IUI on 6/25 = BFN 
    Home Study Finalized 8/14/12! Profile Active - 8/17/12! 
    Officially Matched 8/29/12, Our perfect angel born 9/25/12! 
    Biggest surprise ever, unexpected BFP on 4/12/13! 

     Our Angel through Adoption
     Lilypie Third Birthday tickers


    Our Little Miracle
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    image
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