How would you fix this?

dragossoul84

My DH is on my last nerve right now. I am going in for surgery the 3rd of August his parents were coming up for a week. Now its not the most oppertune but they do not get to see DS often they havent seen him since birth they live 6 hours away. They are very generous with us always sending baby things and such. They said they were hoping to have ds stay in the guest room of our house with them while they were here. Instead of my husband saying he was uncomfortable he made it sound like my mom (who offered to stay one night to help me after my surgery) and I didnt want them to stay with us. So they come back with they just wont stay with us. I'm the least favorite daughter in law already his family doesnt really like me all I asked him to do was to call and find out their schedule for coming up so we could figure out what I needed help with from my mom as I need some one to watch our newborn and someone in the hospital with me but they wouldnt let our son come so I needed two people to help. I'm furious he has made me look like an ungrateful jerk I dont know how to talk to them and tell them we'd like them to stay with us so they can spend more time with ds and that my husband was being passive aggressive.

bethCT

wait, thay want your child to sleep in their room and not his own room?  I know i am sleep deprived and likely missing something, but that seems odd to me.

dragossoul84

He is a colicky newborn and they were trying to be helpful since he is in our bedroom and I am going into surgery. It was well meaning we just weren't comfortable with it and instead of telling his parents that he made it sound like my mom and myself didnt want them here. Now I look like a creep and it just makes me so angry I hate passive aggressive and I hate being made out to be the bad guy when I was getting the house ready for them even though I'm sick

sam19

Call them and say "We would love for you to come and stay with us. It would be an amazing help while I am in the hospital for my surgery and recovering. We just would prefer if LO stayed in his/our room instead of with you but appreciate the sentiment."

Problem solved. 

JulesFo

sam19:

Call them and say "We would love for you to come and stay with us. It would be an amazing help while I am in the hospital for my surgery and recovering. We just would prefer if LO stayed in his/our room instead of with you but appreciate the sentiment."

Problem solved. 

I agree. The best way to clear up any confusion or communication issues is to contact them directly to express your thanks and wishes. If the only communication is coming through your husband, it's like playing telephone. I'd also tell DH that next time, you'd like to be on the same page with him before he talks to his parents.