So, here's my "thing"...

EastCoastBride

I'm 42.  Never in my personal life have I ever known anyone to throw themselves a party to "celebrate motherhood/ being PG", or what have you.  

Yes, becoming a mom is a HUGE life changer.  But I have to say - I find a party just to "celebrate being PG" to be a bit AWish.  Wow - you have a big belly!  So we all have to stand around and 'celebrate' that?  Um, o.k. 

While I've never known anyone to throw a "meet the baby" party either, at least w/ that I understand it.  There is a new baby to meet!  People are usually excited to do this.  There is a point.

But just to celebrate someone getting PG?  I just feel like it's a cheap excuse for someone to throw themselves a party that (supposedly) isn't a shower when they don't think they are getting a shower.  I call it a cheap excuse because I really try to imagine this - if I got an invitation to a "let's celebrate Mary being PG", even if the word "shower" wasn't mentioned, I'd probably absolutely think it was a shower.  And I'd show up w/ a gift.  Because, again, I've never known anyone to seriously throw themselves a "I'm PG!!!" party. 

 

Wish82

>>golf clap<<

 

I completely agree.  

Liz4444

I'd rather throw an 'I'm not pregnant' party everything I get my period.  I love a good excuse to drink!  Do you think that's too AW?

EastCoastBride

Liz4444:

I'd rather throw an 'I'm not pregnant' party everything I get my period.  I love a good excuse to drink!  Do you think that's too AW?

See, it might be AW, but I'd go to that party!

MelleTX

Several times I have thought about throwing an "I'm not getting married" party and even registering - like Carrie on Sex and the City.

phq2011

IMO, being pg doesn't lend itself to partying. You can't be outside if it is too hot, you can't drink, you run out of energy much easier. That sounds like a miserable party to me. Honestly, as uncomfortable as I am, I even struggled to keep up with my shower, and all I did was open presents and eat cake, lol.

christieep

MelleTX:

Several times I have thought about throwing an "I'm not getting married" party and even registering - like Carrie on Sex and the City.

That is one of my favorite episodes!!!!  Nothing wrong with not being married and having awesome shoes! 

MelleTX

christieep:

MelleTX:

Several times I have thought about throwing an "I'm not getting married" party and even registering - like Carrie on Sex and the City.

That is one of my favorite episodes!!!!  Nothing wrong with not being married and having awesome shoes! 

Although none of my fabulous shoes fit my fat, swollen, pregnant feet.  

Liz4444

MelleTX:

christieep:

MelleTX:

Several times I have thought about throwing an "I'm not getting married" party and even registering - like Carrie on Sex and the City.

That is one of my favorite episodes!!!!  Nothing wrong with not being married and having awesome shoes! 

Although none of my fabulous shoes fit my fat, swollen, pregnant feet.  

Don't even try, I ruined my 2 favorite pairs of shoes stuffing my bloated feet into them.  It was so depressing when I put them on after Li was born and they were all stretched out.  DH was also very unhappy to have to pay for another pair of Balenciaga flats.

Liz4444

EastCoastBride:

Liz4444:

I'd rather throw an 'I'm not pregnant' party everything I get my period.  I love a good excuse to drink!  Do you think that's too AW?

See, it might be AW, but I'd go to that party!

Pool party at my place in 3 weeks! I'm not pregnant... Woohoo!

BallSox

Amen. 

 

It's either a shower (pre-baby) or a gtg after the baby is born (whatever formality level and you want to call it).  

I've never heard of a "wahoo, I'm pregnant!" party.

phq2011

BallSox:

Amen. 

 

It's either a shower (pre-baby) or a gtg after the baby is born (whatever formality level and you want to call it).  

I've never heard of a "wahoo, I'm pregnant!" party.

When you said that, I totally pictured your DS's face that is in your siggy.

BallSox

phq2011:

BallSox:

Amen. 

 

It's either a shower (pre-baby) or a gtg after the baby is born (whatever formality level and you want to call it).  

I've never heard of a "wahoo, I'm pregnant!" party.

When you said that, I totally pictured your DS's face that is in your siggy.

lol.  Idk if I'd have that big of a smile right now.  

Related note:  According to the hospital I delivered at, he actually WAS pregnant because they charged him for a c/s too.   That was fun to sort out (we didn't realize it until about a month after we got home). 

At one point, in my exhausted, sore, sleep deprived and medicated state I actually said "I could even understand the confusion if he had a uterus, but ffs, that's not a third nipple down there.  If they think he had a c/s, they obviously failed biology 101".

phq2011

BallSox:

phq2011:

BallSox:

Amen. 

 

It's either a shower (pre-baby) or a gtg after the baby is born (whatever formality level and you want to call it).  

I've never heard of a "wahoo, I'm pregnant!" party.

When you said that, I totally pictured your DS's face that is in your siggy.

lol.  Idk if I'd have that big of a smile right now.  

Related note:  According to the hospital I delivered at, he actually WAS pregnant because they charged him for a c/s too.   That was fun to sort out (we didn't realize it until about a month after we got home). 

At one point, in my exhausted, sore, sleep deprived and medicated state I actually said "I could even understand the confusion if he had a uterus, but ffs, that's not a third nipple down there.  If they think he had a c/s, they obviously failed biology 101".

You could have had an "I'm pg" party for you and your DS! lol 

Cranang

I would love to go to a "I'm not pregnant" party.  WAAAAAAAAAAY more fun.  I might start having one every month when I get my period.  Drinking heavily during my crazy periods sounds awesome.

lovebug33

Depends on how you became pg. It took us five years of pain and suffering and losses to become pg. My friends were so ecstatic, that they threw a party to celebrate teh fact that I got pg. Although, it was a bbq and no gifts were involved since there was a baby shower going to be held later. However, people wanted to celebrate reaching a huge milestone we never thought we'd make.

rhubarb123

I agree with you ECB...and I don't care how long or what kind of struggle it was for someone to get pregnant.  That is a personal thing.  The celebration is when there is a shower.  If there isn't a shower, for whatever reason, then I think a "meet the baby party" is approrpriate.

We had a meet the baby party for #2 and #3 at the same time we had our annual BBQ.  It just happened that they were 4-6 weeks old at the time.  If they had been 4 or 5 months old we would have never had a "meet the baby party".

SingleMom31

MelleTX:

Several times I have thought about throwing an "I'm not getting married" party and even registering - like Carrie on Sex and the City.

I had a friend who called off her wedding ~2 weeks before, moved back to our hometown, and left a lot of "their" stuff in the house with her ex-fianc?. We threw a small "You're not getting married" party for her on what would have been her wedding night - gifts were all fun stuff like new wine glasses, Cosmo mix for her SATC wannabe moments, etc. and we drank a fair amount. It was a pretty awesome party and she was grateful to not be home alone that night.  

EastCoastBride

lovebug33:

Depends on how you became pg. It took us five years of pain and suffering and losses to become pg. My friends were so ecstatic, that they threw a party to celebrate teh fact that I got pg. Although, it was a bbq and no gifts were involved since there was a baby shower going to be held later. However, people wanted to celebrate reaching a huge milestone we never thought we'd make.

The bolded is the key - THEY threw it for you.  It took me 5 years and many IVF's to get PG.  My friends actually did the same thing.  It was just 6 of us at my friends pool (speaking of pool parties!).  This wasn't something that had ever been done in our friend group and hasn't been done since - it was truly a special event for me because of how hard it had been to get PG.  And it was completely their idea. 

My point is that this idea is thrown out as a party the MTB can throw for herself when she doesn't think a shower is going to be thrown.  And it's also used as an excuse by MTB's.  "I just want to celebrate my pregnancy!!!!!". 

Someone throwing their own " yay- I'm PG" party is AWish and a cheap excuse to supposedly get around the "oh, I'm not supposed to throw myself a shower" etiquette rule. 

 

bklynbmp

Provided no mention of gifts were mentioned, I would be more than happy to go to a meet the baby party with gift in hand because I'm happy for my friend and actually do want to see the baby. If you aren't that close to someone or aren't geniunely happy for their new arrival, its very easy to decline.  Im all for etiquette but not every moment of our lives has to be stuffed in obscurity b/c it might upset one or two people.

StaceySMC13

MelleTX:

Several times I have thought about throwing an "I'm not getting married" party and even registering - like Carrie on Sex and the City.

 This - exactly.  I too used donor sperm and to be honest, I'm loving the whole experience of being pregnant and single.   

EastCoastBride

bklynbmp:

Provided no mention of gifts were mentioned, I would be more than happy to go to a meet the baby party with gift in hand because I'm happy for my friend and actually do want to see the baby. If you aren't that close to someone or aren't geniunely happy for their new arrival, its very easy to decline.  Im all for etiquette but not every moment of our lives has to be stuffed in obscurity b/c it might upset one or two people.

I guess you didn't read what I wrote.  I'm not talking about a meet the baby party.  They make sense - there is a baby to meet.  I'm talking about "I'm PG and want to celebrate being PG" parties that are cropping up as viable options on these boards.

camilleluke

I didn't have parties to celebrate that I was PG, but with my two boys, I had both a baby shower before they were born and then a Welcome shower after.  Both were preemies, so for my 9 year old, we did the welcome shower on his actual due date.  My younger son, who will 6 tomorrow, had a baby shower a few weeks before he arrived, but the Welcome shower was about 2 months later.  Now I'm pregnant for the third time, with a girl.  I don't plan to have a "Look!  I'm PG" party or anything like that, but because I'm basically starting over and with a different gender, I'm likely to have a baby shower for her, and if need-be another Welcome shower.  Just saying...

BallSox

camilleluke:

I didn't have parties to celebrate that I was PG, but with my two boys, I had both a baby shower before they were born and then a Welcome shower after.  Both were preemies, so for my 9 year old, we did the welcome shower on his actual due date.  My younger son, who will 6 tomorrow, had a baby shower a few weeks before he arrived, but the Welcome shower was about 2 months later.  Now I'm pregnant for the third time, with a girl.  I don't plan to have a "Look!  I'm PG" party or anything like that, but because I'm basically starting over and with a different gender, I'm likely to have a baby shower for her, and if need-be another Welcome shower.  Just saying...

Let me make sure I'm reading this correctly.... you had two showers for each of your first two kids and are having another two for this kid?  

 

EastCoastBride

camilleluke:

I didn't have parties to celebrate that I was PG, but with my two boys, I had both a baby shower before they were born and then a Welcome shower after.  Both were preemies, so for my 9 year old, we did the welcome shower on his actual due date.  My younger son, who will 6 tomorrow, had a baby shower a few weeks before he arrived, but the Welcome shower was about 2 months later.  Now I'm pregnant for the third time, with a girl.  I don't plan to have a "Look!  I'm PG" party or anything like that, but because I'm basically starting over and with a different gender, I'm likely to have a baby shower for her, and if need-be another Welcome shower.  Just saying...

"Just saying" what?  That you're insanely greedy and ask people TWICE for EVERY child to come and buy you stuff?

So, congratulations? 

Hyaline

Thank you

I love hosting parties as much as the next person--ok, probably a lot more--but IMO the point of throwing a party is about spending time with  friends and providing a place, food, and drink for us to have a good time together.  It's not about "Look at (fill in the blank life milestone or moment I want you to notice)!" If you want to throw a party to celebrate your pregnancy, you probably aren't really interested in the "throwing a party" part--you're interested in people paying attention to you and acknowledging your milestone (when--I will be a jerk and say it--no one cares about this as much as you do).  I think the "celebrating my pregnancy" parties fall in the same camp as incessant Facebook "look at me" updates and people who can't stop talking about themselves.