Daycare Days (Long)
bridget0831
member
I stay home with my 20 month old DD during the day and work from home at night after she goes to bed. We have had her in daycare one full day per week (8:30am-4:30pm) for about 6 weeks now. When asked if she likes "school" she says "yeah" very enthusiastically. She seems to love it when she is not there. However, when we talk about going to school the morning of, she starts to cry. She cries when we pull up to the school, and she cries when I try to leave. Her teacher said last week that she doesn't really participate in circle time or join the group for activites. Last week was the first week she did crafts with them. She usually sits by herself and watches the group. I am almost certain that it is because she wants me there with her. She does okay when she plays with other kids and either me or DH is there.
We have decided to do two half days at school to help her be more used to it. My question is, would it be better to send her back-to-back days (Tuesday/Wednesday) or split it (Tuesday/Thursday). I can see pros and cons for both, but wanted the opinion of AP moms. One of the teachers suggested split so there is less time between going back the next week (only one day difference).
I obviously want to do what is best for DD, but for me personally, back-to-back would be better. I will be changing my work hours when she goes to two half days and doing them back-to-back would get it done and out of the way and I think I could be more rested. Like I said, I want to do what is best for DD.
What do you guys think?
Re: Daycare Days (Long)
I would prefer back-to-back and I think this means less transition and more predictability. It would also make it easier to add a third half-day if you need to in the future.
She sounds like she has a temperament that is slow to warm up - more frequent exposure might make it a more familiar environment.You could read this chapter for some ideas on how to deal with her slow adaptability: https://books.google.ca/books?id=zAoiY8UV1x4C&lpg=PA221&ots=vpDsf9hhng&dq=spirited%20child%20slow%20to%20warm&pg=PA215#v=onepage&q=spirited%20child%20slow%20to%20warm&f=false
I know my son would prefer to spend every day with him. I would actually prefer that, too. But if I want to be able to meet his needs for food and shelter, I have to work and be away. That's okay - as the parent, it's up to me to find a way to meet all his needs, even if he can't understand the balancing act that requires.
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Ditto the "slow to warm up" vibe I'm getting from your post for your LO. DD is the same way, and, based on our experience, it sounds like your LO is doing really quite well. At that age, she wouldn't do circle time with a large group of kids even if I was there! Keep talking to her about all the fun stuff she's doing and being interested in her time there (through her) and helping her frame it in a positive manner.
Of course, I think back to back half days would be just fine too, and would be what I'd do for my DD knowing her personality. (Full days around so many people would *exhaust* her, not that she'd sleep better, she'd just be wound up and overtired and overstressed.)
We send DD to a Montessori half days three days a week and they strongly suggest three days in a row so each day off isn't followed by a starting over "Monday" kind of day.
DD didn't start until 21 months and while she had a few days were she cried for 1 minute at drop off she seems to do really well with this schedule. That said, DD is not a slow to warm up girl. She is go, go, go and involved in every activity every minute she is at school. Obviously, each kid is very different.
With only two days there with five "off" days I don't think it will matter too much either way because the first day back for the week will always be starting over for the most part.
Based on what the school suggested to us I would do the two back to back days in hopes of day 2 being a better day each week.
Good luck!
Thanks for the responses. And thanks Hoser for the chapter link, I will be reading that and probably will buy the whole book.
DD is definitely slow to warm up. It takes her awhile even with people she knows. I will be taking her back-to-back days. Today was much better according to her teachers, but hopefully it will get even better.
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