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Natural Birth
LollyBug18
member
Christian Mommas?
LollyBug18
member
I've hesitated writing this for a few days because I don't want to start anything about religion but I feel like I need to post this for fear of my new dilemma getting in the way of the birth that I'm hoping for this time.
First off, DH and I are Christians. We take that seriously and make it our goal to align our lives with what is pleasing to God.
Second, a friend lent me her hypnobabies home study course to look into and, after reading up through the first week and listening to the first tracks a couple times, I had decided that I was really excited about this method and looking forward to studying it more.
Then, on a car trip this past Saturday, I got out my iPod to listen to a track and DH asked what I was listening to. When I told him, he expressed concern over the fact that I was allowing myself to be hypnotized and opening myself up to potential spiritual oppression. I explained to him that I wasn't being brainwashed and that there was nothing "demonic" or against God on these tracks. In turn, he said that I was still allowing myself to lose some consciousness and that could potentially allow bad spirits into my self and he didn't feel comfortable with what I was doing. And, to a point, I agree with him - spiritual warfare is real. I don't want to go against him and I don't want to possibly be opening myself up to anything bad, but I was really bummed that that was the outcome of our conversation and have been having doubts about hypnobabies ever since. In the end, he told me that he had spoken his piece and that he would leave it at that and support whatever my final decision is. But I'm just not convinced one way or the other - that it could or wouldn't open me up to something bad.
So...what are your thoughts? I'm not looking for anyone to bash my (our) beliefs or my husband so please don't take this there...
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Christian Mommas?
I don't know much about hypnobabies, but I recommend looking up scripture about meditation. We are commanded to 'Meditate on scripture' so if your husband has a problem with the hypnobabies course, maybe replace their tracks with scripture.
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
"I am more than a conqueror in Christ Jesus."
"Above all things, God wishes for me to prosper and be in health even as my soul prospers."
etc. etc.
Supernatural Childbirth would probably be a good read for you. It's about applying your faith to allow a pain free labor and delivery. Talks about meditating on God's promises about birth and babies and lists several of them.
Also, the Bible says to ask and we shall receive and to speak what we want. If that is what hypnobabies is having you do, I think you're in the clear.
That said - spiritual warfare is real, but expect to be called crazy when you talk about it online. Also, be careful. If you feel like you are putting yourself in a dangerous position, I'd stop.
ETA - If you want to discuss further, let's talk via private message.
First Child born
5/5/14 and 6/5/14
11/14
Chemical Pregnancy
9/5/15
Second after severe bleeding for 18 weeks due to subchorionic hematoma
Expecting Number 3 due 10/31/2020
My family and close friends are very Christian and myself and several other pregnant woman in our circle had a discussion regarding hypo-birthing. There were a few women who had used this method and felt that the deep relaxation was different than be put under and hypnotized. My mother who is incredibly against hypnosis (for religious reasons) and is a therapist said that in her experience she felt hypo-birthing was very different and encouraged me to look into it.
I think it depends on your comfort and conviction level about it- however it might be worth checking out and seeing if you can retool- their prompts etc with a Christian mantra. I consider myself a strong christian and felt not issue with hypo birthing- I just decided it wasn't the route I wanted to go.
I agree with all of this. My DH wouldn't feel comfortable with my using hypnosis either for the reasons you stated. And to be honest, I think I would find the whole process really annoying while I'm in labor.
During my last birth I found myself "meditating" a lot on Phillipians 4:13. I also listen to worship music during labor like PP mentioned. I would pray with your DH about it and find some Scripture that you find inspiring and comforting, and have your DH work with you during labor to focus on those words.
Good luck with whatever you choose.Have you read Celebration of Discipline? That book has a great chapter on meditation that might help you two expand your conversation as you navigate what is right for your family. Personally, I see the ability to use things like deep breathing and visualization as gifts from God. Our bodies actually change how they work when we do deep, rythmic breathing. The physiological response to biofeedback is the same physiological response as prayer! Those examples are not quite hypnosis, but they still might help you navigate.
As for the whole pain thing, Childbirth Without Fear is an old-school but great read.
More Green For Less Green
Ditto the above. I liked the idea of it, but we ended up being a bit spiritually/biblicaly uncomfortable, so we decided not to use the hypnosis aspect.
I also realized that the approach im looking forward to using is more about "embracing" the experience and using people (husband/doula) and my surroundings (at home) to assist me, rather than trying to "escape" in order to cope.
Here's what hypnobabies says about it. I am a Christian, and I LOVED hypnobabies. I had a nearly pain free birth...and after 2 non-hypnobabies births, I gotta tell you, it was amazing. (birth story if you're interested)
Anyway, this comment on the hypnobabies site sums up how I feel pretty well:
As a Christian myself, I believe that hypnosis is a wonderful tool given to us by God, that has gotten a bad rap from people who have misrepresented it and/or misunderstood it. All hypnosis is
self-hypnosis. No one will be exerting mind control over you to get you to do evil things. Some people are concerned that being in hypnosis opens up the subconscious mind to demonic spiritual control
or influence. In fact, while in hypnosis you are in complete control of the experience. No one can cause you to act in a way that conflicts with your core beliefs or values. Choosing to enter hypnosis does not
remove the covering of Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit. I believe that as a Christian you are protected from all evil and the devil cannot lay claim to your mind even in a relaxed state. I can say wholeheartedly that my God is much bigger than that!
Your DH sounds a lot like my DH. We had the same exact conversation. DH brought up the very same points.
I didn't want to do anything that DH wasn't comfortable with, so we are trying the Bradley method. I really liked the PP's suggestion of using verse to relax. I might look into some of the Christian birthing books as well, but hypnobabies is off the table for us.
this was us exactly (down to the bradley metho too)
I can't add anything further to the hypnobabies comments, I was just wanting to comment on your husband not really understanding your desire for a natural birth.
Have you explained the risks of an epi to yourself and to the baby? Yes they are small risks, and obviously plenty of people have no issues, but I thought he might be more supportive if he knew about that stuff. From what you've explained your DH sounds very caring of you and that he truly wants the best for you both spiritually and physically, so again knowing that an epi is not risk free, and that many consider a med-free birth to have an easier recovery might be appealing to him.
Elizabeth 5yrs old Jane 3yrs old
Have you considered a doula? I used a doula with #2 because my DH annoyed me so much during labor with #1 (his nervousness was just giving off bad "energy" to me). The doula took the pressure off of DH and he was able to relax knowing I was well cared for by a woman who knew her stuff. My doula was a Christian woman who understood the importance of my faith and was able to use it as a tool to help me relax and manage the pain. It sounds like that might be a good solution for you. My doula was a student and only charged me $150. The professional doulas around here charge around $300, so it's comparable to the cost of hypnobabies classes.
Also, maybe it would be good to sit down with your DH and explain your spiritual reasons for wanting a NB. For me, birth is tied very closely to my faith. 1 Timothy 2:15 always resonates with me. There is something about giving birth to my children that draws me closer to God and not numbing myself to the experience so that I can appreciate it fully is a big part of that.
Well, I don't know anything about hypnobirthing either. I just don't think that this is my style. But I am a Christian, too, and I believe in the spiritual realm, healing, warfare, etc. I am seeking a church for our family right now where my husband and I can thrive spiritually together-- I'm more Lutheran, he's Unitarian-- but I was brought up with a lot of R.W. Shambach (who recently passed), and my mother's shattered knee was totally healed at one of his camp meetings.
I have heard a LOT in the course of my life about opening yourself up to demons through basically any kind of sin that is against God. I am not saying more than just that or agreeing with or judging that-- I have heard a lot of people who call themselves Christians say a lot about this, and that is what informs my following opinion.
I don't think that hypnosis is satanic. I think it's a relaxation technique. Even meditation practiced by Buddhist monks, yoga and other new-age practices could be lumped in with this as relaxation techniques that are practiced, but it is all about freeing the mind-- it is not worship, and it is not therefore out of line with what I would consider a Christian fellowship.
If your H thinks that a free mind is up for grabs for demonic infestation, he may consider that you have the Spirit of the Almighty living inside you. They can't tolerate the same living space.
If your H still has concerns, I would suggest discussing the whole thing with your pastor/minister together.
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Can I just say how completely encouraging this thread has been to me. Im on several other boards, however, I feel that there is just a disconnect sometimes. My opinions are based upon being a Christian and believing in God, and it never feels like there are many of us out there. So this was very encouraging and thank you for posting.
Missed the part where he doesn't get the NB thing. There is a story in the OT, not sure where, but it's mentioned in Supernatural Childbirth. Pharoah commands the midwives to kill all baby boys as soon as they are born, but somehow the Hebrew women's boys survive. The midwives say it is because the Hebrew women don't need them for labor.
Worth looking into.
First Child born
5/5/14 and 6/5/14
11/14
Chemical Pregnancy
9/5/15
Second after severe bleeding for 18 weeks due to subchorionic hematoma
Expecting Number 3 due 10/31/2020
And this. Yes.
First Child born
5/5/14 and 6/5/14
11/14
Chemical Pregnancy
9/5/15
Second after severe bleeding for 18 weeks due to subchorionic hematoma
Expecting Number 3 due 10/31/2020
To the OP, I am a pretty conservative lifelong Christian mama and I am thrilled to be using Hypnobabies for this birth. I will share my experience with my last birth. I was so excited to have a spiritual birthing experience. I had my worship music playlist ready to go, I had my scriptures to recite and cling to, I felt ready to handle natural childbirth. I was particularly inspired by a video of a Christian lady named Temple singing Psalms 23 through her contractions (https://www.nashvillemusicpros.com/video/1322798:Video:77693). "That's what I want to be doing during labor!" I thought to myself. And I honestly thought that would be me.
Fast forward to labor and delivery. I was so excited/nervous/unsure of the process I had extreme difficulty settling down and no way of focusing myself on these things once I arrived at the hospital. I had a beautiful birthing experience with the help of an epi and I am not sad about it at all, but it was nothing like what I had hoped for or pictured as far as meditating on scriptures, prayer, etc.
This pregnancy I am a whole different person. I learned from a particularly painful PPD/anxiety crash that I had PTSD along with severe hormonal and nutritional deficiencies along with undiagnosed Lyme Disease. My Christian MDs were at a loss as to what to do with me. I ended up needing to use a lot of less "traditional" treatments to regain my footing as a person and particularly as a Christian.
I used EMDR (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy) with a psychiatric mental health nurse practitioner and acupuncture to combat the PTSD/anxiety. I also began to see a naturopath to help me level out my body systems through diet and supplements. I spoke about these things openly with my Bible study group, pastor, church family etc. I learned to tie both my spiritual health to my physical and mental health and found myself beginning to thrive in both areas.
I realize was blessed in that I was able to find wonderful Christian practitioners for my psychiatric and non-traditional medical care. My eyes were really opened to the wonderful things our bodies are capable of doing to heal and maintain balance. We really were wonderfully made, and I had to learn to trust my body as a powerful and miraculous creation. My spiritual journey was incredibly strengthened during those difficult years and my mind and heart opened to avenues of healing that I now honestly believe are more in line with my Christian values and relationship with God than any western medicine has been (although I'm not against western medicine and still utilize it too).
All that being said, this pregnancy I am much more open to techniques that I never would have considered previously. And as I looked further into that video of Temple singing the 23rd Psalm during labor I learned that she was actually using the eyes open, interactive techniques from Hypnobabies! That was really encouraging to me. I realized she had more tools than I did to remain calm enough to engage in scripture recitation during labor.
I prayed about it, I sought input from people I trust, and decided to move forward with the program. I do like to have a moment of prayer before I begin any of the training that there be a protecting of my mind and heart and that the God of Abraham remains Lord over me at all times. I've also prayed that the Holy Spirit would give me intuition if I was setting myself up for danger. I have yet to feel that any of the scripts or techniques in the program are in opposition to my beliefs about myself, my creator or my abilities to birth a child. If I do at any point, I will address that seriously, but I'm not anticipating it.
I'm not at all suggesting you can't have a wonderful beautiful spiritual birth experience without the use of hypnobirthing. I just wanted to share my experience and say that I believe it's a beautiful tool that can be used to help achieve those things without endangering yourself spiritually. It does boil down to your own personal walk (and your dh's) and how stable and settled you feel in your own spiritual journey. I would say that motherhood has settled me spiritually in many ways I was not before, so perhaps that's why I'm open to childbirth hypnosis now when I wasn't before. You will probably find yourself stretching and growing in similar ways too. The process of birth and motherhood is amazing in whatever way you proceed.
)
I will add that I have asked my DH how he felt about the danger of hypnosis and why he's comfortable with me using it. What it boils down to for him is that he is skeptical of hypnosis and it's efficacy altogether. So he's not opposed to it because he pretty much thinks it's fluff and doesn't' believe in it at all. LOL My mom, on the other hand, has had more concerns like your DH's, but is being supportive of it being my decision and has expressed that she trusts my intuition after seeing my recovery through more unconventional processes. Still, I'm happy to have her praying over me in this situation.
Blessings to you as you make your way through pregnancy and childbirth.
I think the overall concern is of losing control of your own mind/thoughts etc. It's sort of like the common Christian concern over yoga when practiced with meditation. There are many who believe that purposefully trying to clear/free your mind may set you up to be open to an indwelling of a spirit other than the Holy Spirit.
I personally don't believe that the Holy Spirit has any plans of leaving me open to that kind of attack unless I am purposefully seeking it out. I think my personal spiritual walk is evidence enough that I daily seek guidance of the Holy Spirit rather than any other. But some may believe differently. Everyone has to walk according to how he/she is convicted.
I will admit that at first this post gave me a pang of concern/guilt that perhaps I was doing something wrong too. But really, like you've said, I find that the tracks and information seem easily integrated to Christianity and haven't felt at risk. But during my previous pregnancy I looked into Hypnobabies and thought it was not a good match for me although I hadn't listened to the tracks.
Tarta - I think that you are fine. You seem very firm in your faith and the Bible promises us that God is faithful to those that keep the Holy Spirit within them and will protect them from evil. I think that as long as your meditation is centered on Christ, you're fine. I think the concern is that people completely free their mind and don't rely on the guidance of the Holy Spirit while under these types of hypnosis, which leaves them open to all sorts of deception.
I don't think what you are doing is all that different than what I do during labor. While I don't do the formal hypnobabies thing, I do try to put myself into a "zone" where I clear my mind and get into my body (if that makes sense). But while doing this I keep God at the center of it all, praying to Him to keep me focused and strong. I have a feeling that's what you plan to do, you're just using hypnobabies as a tool to get there.
I don't think hypnobabies itself is evil. I just think that Christians need to remember to keep their faith a central part of the process. Hypnobabies doesn't tell you to do that, so you probably have to adapt the process for it. If you do that, God will protect you.
Thanks love! I was hoping I'd see you chime in on this. Yes, I have come to the conclusion that I really just lacked the skills of deep relaxation and focus to apply during labor last time. My prayer time was never as intensely meditative before because I just didn't know how to get there. So I'm using Hypnobabies as a huge building block to be able to release my fears and anxieties and focus on the things I want to focus on this time. Although I feel treating my PTSD has also played a huge role in that as well. I've relaxed and balanced out so much after dealing with that. So, we shall see.
) I also find that I can use the positive affirmations track of the program to integrate claiming Biblical promises. They fit together nicely.
I never meant to make anyone question themselves or feel guilty! I'm sorry for that. My concern, and DH's, is (was? not sure yet...) that using hypnobabies would, in some way, be displeasing to God - whether that be in relying on myself more than Him or allowing negative influences to affect my life or that sort of thing. Honestly, the thought never really crossed my mind until DH brought it up so now I'm trying to sort through it all. I think these responses have been great but now it will ultimately be a decision between me, DH and God and what we feel is best for us and our faith. Don't feel guilty or like you've been doing something wrong for not considering this side of things before.
I've been out of town the past couple days and am pleasantly surprised by the wonderful responses that have been left, though maybe I shouldn't be. I'm so encouraged to deepen my faith during this time, something I've been longing for but just sort of stuck on for some reason right now. I'm looking forward to increasing my study of scripture and time in prayer, as well as my dependence on God and the Holy Spirit. More than ever I hope to be able to stick around this board for the long haul.
To the OP,Oh don't feel badly like you made us all feel guilty. I think your concern is totally valid and this has been a great discussion. I had felt quite settled about it, but had a momentary flicker of concern again seeing how many ladies here seem to think it dangerous. It was good to help me search my self again and seek God's guidance again. I think it's a great conversation to have. Like you said, each person has to make that decision based on what you feel will be right for you and is God's will for you.
Like I mentioned, during my last pregnancy Hypnobabies wasn't something I felt comfortable with. This time around I feel like I'm in the right place in life to use it as a tool. Continue to seek God about it and honor your husband in your decisions. You can't go wrong when you do that.
)
I don't know anything about hypnobirthing and I will admit that I'm probably not 'as Christian' as most of you here (sorry, I know that sounds like it's a competition, but that's the only way I can think to put it), but my faith is extremely important to me. My thoughts, FWIW, are this: as a few PPs have said, you seem to take your faith extremely seriously, OP, and I don't think that the holy spirit will leave you.
I also think that our God is a loving and forgiving one. I don't think that you would be displeasing God in any way but even if you did, He would forgive you. And I believe you are still relying on Him even if you use hypnobabies: after all, you're letting your body do what it was naturally supposed to do, confident in the knowledge that God has made you capable of doing this without medication.
Whatever you decide, good luck, and I wish you all the best!