Feel like I'm always hitting a road block...
I have been a member of TK, TN, and TB for quite a while but mostly lurk. Well, I either need advice or a kick in the ass.
I am 28, have high BP, diabetes, depression, and am overweight. I am on medication for the BP, diabetes (metformin), and depression. I eventually want to have kids but I know that currently I am in no shape to even try. I have had issues with my weight all my life but I wasn't diagnosed with diabetes until about 2 years ago. I have tried many diets, weight watchers, and all sorts of things. The problem, I believe, is that my anti-depressant makes me have the "I don't care" attitude towards most things, especially food. I will be very persistent about my diet for no more than two weeks, then I fall back into a rut of not caring. Lately I have just kinda given up because I know that I will try my hardest to stick to a diet then I will just fall off that path. I still try to eat the best I can but not close to what I should be doing. I also do Zumba twice a week so I am getting some exercise.
I just feel like a failure and that I will never get this weight off so that I can have healthy babies. I'm going to the doctor tomorrow and talk to him and see what he says. I've also thought about gastric bypass but surgery scares the crap out of me and I had a friend die from lap band surgery several years ago. Do I just need a kick in the ass or counselling or what? TIA.
Re: Feel like I'm always hitting a road block...
It sounds like the biggest hurdle for you right now is your lack of trust in yourself. My advice to you would be to focus on your health one day at a time. When you wake up just start focusing on what you can do TODAY to be healthy. Don't worry about what you're going to do two weeks from now - it's what you can do right now that is good for you. I would recommend joining SparkPeople.com. It's free, you can track what you're actually eating (which is a VERY powerful tool, if you haven't tried it) and how many calories a day you're burning, and you'll get daily motivational emails that either include articles on healthy living or it'll be a journal entry from someone who uses SparkPeople who is sharing about their own struggles/breakthroughs/accomplishments. It's an awesome site!
Remember, YOU are not a failure. There's just something you've been trying to do that hasn't worked out yet the way you want it to. That's all. The failing is not who you are, it just hurts extra when we fail at something we really want. It doesn't mean you will always fail at this! You can do this! I don't know if you need a kick in the ass or counseling. Counseling would probably be worth your while to at least try out if you haven't tried it yet.
...just my 2 cents.
I know the feeling. I was always the chubby girl. I spent my teens and twenties losing the same 20-30 pounds over and over again. Food controlled my life. Every bite made me feel guilty, I kept a running tally in my head of the calories I was consuming. I had intense cravings all the time. I had IBS and anxiety. I thought for sure that something was wrong with me, that I need counseling.
A few years ago my husband talked me into trying the paleo/primal diet and it made all the difference. I lost weight without counting calories, my meals taste amazing and are filling so I never feel hungry, no more sugar cravings. No more anxiety and IBS. I lost the weight finally and weigh less than I did in high school. The best part is I was able to throw away my fat clothes because I know I will never need them again.
It might be worth giving it a try, even for just 30 days. Mark's Daily Apple is a great place to start. Read some of the success stories. You will read about people losing weight effortlessly, getting off medication, reversing type 2 diabetes, etc.
Well I can tell you my own experience and see if maybe you can take from it anything. My whole life I was never what you would consider skinny, I was never really fat either just sort of heavier than all my friends. This caused me to have a really poor body image, when I met my husband 9 years ago I was ok with how I looked but happy in that I had met someone I loved, over the course of 5 years with him, following our wedding, I gained 100lbs. Slowly overtime it's harder to really stop, I feel. And I went to the MD because I was having gastro problems, he dx with IBS and basically said I was over weight and why I had this problem, he gave me small changes to make in my eating habits and that if I lose weight it will help. Well apprently years of making bad food choices and hating how I looked, that was all I needed to hear, over the course of 1.5 years I lost 85lbs and for the first time in my life I loved how I looked. Shortly after this I got pregnant and am now dealing with a very poor body image and having a lot of difficulty losing the weight again. I have recently met with a dietician and we seem to understand that my weight gain is associated with stress and being on a so called "diet", fad diets like weight watchers, south beach dont work for me because they're all about cutting things out, I need a "diet" that allows me to still enjoy the food I like while eating healthy everyday. So sometimes I think it's about finding the right time and right way for your to go about this change and then it wont be about sticking to it it'll be a new way of life, if that makes sense.
oh and btw if you're interested you can private message me and I'd be happy to share with you some of what she recently went over with me, things like add more fiber to your diet and protein with meals etc.
I agree with pp about taking it one day at a time, and even just one healthy choice at a time. If this afternoon you choose an apple over french fries then great.
It can be easy to think, "but I ate cheesecake for breakfast why bother," but every little bit adds up.
Also I think it's better to work at one good habit at a time, rather than doing a whole radical diet change.
So maybe you replace a glass of soda with water, and drink at least 5 glasses of water through the day, and that's your focus for the month.
Then move onto having fruit for a morning snack rather than chocolate. Or have two chocolate biscuits after dinner, rather than 6 etc etc etc.
Also look at what's behind some of your eating.
I gave up diet coke. I used to walk up to the corner shop everyday during the working week. I started by buying smaller quantities, and then only going every other day. What I realised was I enjoyed the walk in the fresh air and the few minutes away from work more than the drink. The drink was just an excuse to go for a walk. After that it was easy to just go for a walk and not bother about the drink.
Finally, I've gone up and down with my weight. If you look at my ticker you can see that I've lost a substantial amount and still have more to go. This is the first time in my life when I've been doing it purely for my own good health, and really enjoying how good it feels. I'm not trying to fit into a dress, or get slim for a party. I just want to feel physically good, and I do.
Good luck.
Elizabeth 5yrs old Jane 3yrs old