I'm pretty sure my ex is ticked with me now

Ginlyn0

but he can get over it. DD has a girl scout pool party coming up the first weekend in Aug. It's Ex's weekend and he never lets her do anything on his weekends.

 I am allowed per my CO to choose one weekend in July (when he has DD) if I give notice before April 15th for my  "sumer visitation" AND I can get one weekend to withhold visitation from him (in June or August) if I either give notice by April 15th OR give at least 2 weeks notice for my "extended summer visitation". I usually do not take these weekends. I have take one July weekend in 7 years and I have taken the additional weekend 2x in that time. I usually don't take them because I don't want to "take away" from him because I have her most of the time.

So I texted him yesterday morning "hey, can I keep DD the weekend of Aug 3-5 for my summer visit? She has a gs pool party that Saturday night." I texted him to try to avoid having to mail him anything if I can get a text back just confirming.

He replies las night saying "Thats fine I can just take her the next to weekends to make up."

So me being how I am, debated for a while about whether to fight him over the weekend I'm entitled to or just switch yet again because he doesn't want to allow DD to do anything during his visitation time which is the only reason I'm even requesting the darn weekend. This child has never even been allowed to participate in any sports, ect that fall on weekends because of this. We already have my SKs both of those weekends.

Well I woke up this morning and remembered that we have tickets to a professional baseball game one weekend in August. Sure enough I look and the tickets are the Saturday night of the following weekend (the weekend he is trying to "trade" me for.)

I texted him "I think you misunderstood what I meant. I'm taking my "extended summer visit" that weekend. Meaning you don't make it up. I am giving you more than 14 days notice but if you want me to send something in the mail, I can."

No reply yet....

I hate that he forgets I'm entitled to certain things as well just because I have her most of the time. This is the exact reason I usually don't mess with it because I've had to highlight and mail that part of the CO to him before. His mom probably still has his copy of the CO because she always kept it before he got married.

I have a feeling that I'll be mailing him info anyway.

hterry85

Why would you need to mail anything? Is that what to CO says? You have the texts showing you gave him proper notification...if he doesn't have a copy of his own CO to verify you're not making it up, that's his problem.

FutureMrsWittig

Go ahead and mail it.  It'll save you a headache later.

Ginlyn0

I'm supposed to give written notice. Not sure if a text will stand as written notice or not so if he's going to give me a hard time about it then I will just mail him something as well.

twister22

I would just email it. Although, if you two don't email anything, then I would mail it. I wouldn't mess with highlighting sections of your CO though, I would just send a typed letter with something along the lines of "BD, Per our CO, I will be taking DD for my extended summer visit 8/x-x. -BM" Short and simple, but keeps you covered.

I do understand BD not wanting to lose time with DD though. My extended summer visit with DS takes two of BD's weekends, so if he asks for some extra time before or after, I will let him take it.

Ginlyn0

twister22:

I would just email it. Although, if you two don't email anything, then I would mail it. I wouldn't mess with highlighting sections of your CO though, I would just send a typed letter with something along the lines of "BD, Per our CO, I will be taking DD for my extended summer visit 8/x-x. -BM" Short and simple, but keeps you covered.

I do understand BD not wanting to lose time with DD though. My extended summer visit with DS takes two of BD's weekends, so if he asks for some extra time before or after, I will let him take it.

He doesn't email LOL which is why I was hoping I could accomplish it through text. SM emails me DD's EOBs and I've emailed with her regarding insurance but since it's technically not his email I don't think that would work. I will need to either hand deliver it to him or mail it and since I won't see him until July 31st when he brings DD home. I will just have to mail it.

hterry85

gin9874:

I'm supposed to give written notice. Not sure if a text will stand as written notice or not so if he's going to give me a hard time about it then I will just mail him something as well.

Got it. In that case I would just mail and get it over with to make sure your bases are covered.

angelamaster1986

I would mail it as you need to be sure the proper steps have been taken that he has been notified (legally) but I would also make an offer that would allow him to actually have his DD for an extra weekend. Even if it is after the game you have tickets to for the reason you have her the majority of the time anyway. I just think its a nice gesture no matter what the CO says. I hope that helps!

Ginlyn0

Okay, there were several more text messages back and forth and then he started saying I owed him a weekend from another time. I was about to come on here and post how irritated I was (because I keep track of all that) and he finally called me. (Note: He works weird hours so I don't call him because I never know when he's working). He was thoroughly confused because several months ago we discussed switching a weekend for something for DD and then what we needed to switch for got cancelled so we didn't end up switching. He was counting that. I reminded him that I had told him it was cancelled and we didn't switch. He finally remembered. He said it was fine if I had her that 1st weekend and kept my normal weekend. I offered him to keep her an extra day or two for summer and he declined. Strange considering he wanted me to switch weekends to begin with, but whatever LOL

I hate switching weekends! I actually had originally told the girl scout troop leader that I wasn't going to switch because it was too big of a headache and the girls would just have to miss the pool party because we have to switch with 2 people.

In the grand scheme of things, this is the biggest problem we've had in quite a while and really, this is nothing.

angelamaster1986

gin9874:

Okay, there were several more text messages back and forth and then he started saying I owed him a weekend from another time. I was about to come on here and post how irritated I was (because I keep track of all that) and he finally called me. (Note: He works weird hours so I don't call him because I never know when he's working). He was thoroughly confused because several months ago we discussed switching a weekend for something for DD and then what we needed to switch for got cancelled so we didn't end up switching. He was counting that. I reminded him that I had told him it was cancelled and we didn't switch. He finally remembered. He said it was fine if I had her that 1st weekend and kept my normal weekend. I offered him to keep her an extra day or two for summer and he declined. Strange considering he wanted me to switch weekends to begin with, but whatever LOL

I hate switching weekends! I actually had originally told the girl scout troop leader that I wasn't going to switch because it was too big of a headache and the girls would just have to miss the pool party because we have to switch with 2 people.

In the grand scheme of things, this is the biggest problem we've had in quite a while and really, this is nothing.

You offered him some days and he declined... I dont get it?! Glad everything else is working out though and this is taken care of!!  

HEATHERNJASON1

I have a very messy CO with a very how should I say very unperdictable /emotionally unstable X to put it nicely. But one good thing about the CO we have to do everything in writing on an internet site called OUR FAMILY WIZARD, everything is date and time stamped there is no excuse. Everything is on it events, school, vacations, trades, swaps ect...... the best part about it the judge or attny's  can also read it. It is legal and binding. But so worth it. It is the ONLY why we are allowed to communicate via email thru it. Highly recommend it for anybody in a Custody situation.....

 

Good Luck !