Shopping help please!!!

la79al

DD1 is a terror when it comes to shopping.  Grocery shopping is my living he!l.  DD2 has always HATED to ride in the cart so I generally end up carrying her or at least letting her sit on the handle while I hang onto her.  DD1 is usually running around.  Literally, running.  If she is not running around, she is pulling or pushing on the cart, trying to get DD2 to do things with her, climbing around displays (paper towels, etc), jumping onto and off of the side of the cart, etc.  I have tried threats, I have tried bribes.  Twice within the past week we have left before we got more than 2 things on our list.  Today we were supposed to go for a special treat after the store and we had to leave early.  Leaving her home is not an option as I have no one to leave her home with.  On the rare instances where DH goes along, he generally just does a lot of 'did you hear what your mother said?' until he gets frustrated and wanders off.  The only thing I can think of is pulling out the DS I have stashed away for long car rides and letting her play with that but even then, once the cart gets too full that won't be an option (because she definitely can't even try to play it while she walks).  Any ideas or suggestions?  None of the stores in our area have the play area things anymore. 

AgrippaRidesAgain

You can't leave them home with DH instead of having him come along? Does he have a really erratic schedule? I grocery shop at 6 am on Sunday mornings. The kids and DH are generally still sleeping.

la79al

Yes, DH is chasing overtime at work now so he finds out an hour before he is supposed to leave work that he is working another shift.  Or he will get a phone call in the morning and he has to leave within 15 minutes.  When he's not actually at work, he's generally too exhausted to take care of the kids. I think it will get better after summer is over but as of right now, he's not very dependable (but we desperately need the money for basic bills). 

KathrynMD

can you do grocery delivery and/or a pick up service?

If you can't do that, I'd be very hard core about behavior expectations before you go - either everybody sits in the cart or keeps a hand on the cart at all times.  I'd bring 2-3 snacks/tiny presents to dole out at the store (but not tell them what they are/when they will get them - just hey, look at you acting like a big girl, I think there's a treat in here, etc.), I'd also get them engaged in teh grocery shopping at least - ask them to look for things you know they will recognize - for DD that's normally milk, fruit snacks, bananas, pretzels, etc. I keep telling her to keep an eye out and then when we "find" it, she gets to pick which one we buy and put it in the cart.

And - tell them if they behave at the grocery store, you guys can get ice cream/go to the pool/playground, etc. whatever they like/want.

 

Brewtowngrl

We left once with a cart full.  I hate shopping with my boys too.  I just keep at it and have a treat in the car all ready for them or let them know they can pick something small at the store.  

jlw2505

Go shopping at night after the kids are in bed and DH is home to watch them or find a Mommy's Helper for a few hours during the week and leave the kids home with that person.  This is a phase and it will pass but there is no point putting you and the kids through trying to shop right now.  DH and I did online shopping for about a year when DD#1 was around 2-3 and DD#1 was an infant to around age 1 as it was just not worth the hassles.  We would take them every now and then if we had a short list and knew it would be fast and as they have gotten older, it has gotten better.  We keep them involved by having them help us find things from the list.  We typically get a snack for them to eat which keeps them busy in the beginning of the trip and if both DH and I go, we will split the list and the kids up and we each get certain items and then meet up again - it goes faster and keeps the kids moving.

Wisteriacow

I would either use a delivery service like Peapod or make the kids help with the shopping. I've heard of moms making a picture list of the exact product so that younger kids have to hunt for the items and help put them in the cart. Maybe having a focused way to help would work.

KL777

A mom that I know said she would go at lunch time and have her child eat her lunch while she grocery shopped.  She said she would have to shop really fast in order to get what she wanted before her daughter finished her lunch.

I guess that's practical but it seems like there's gotta be a better way.

Court0026

My kids are awful too!  We actually had to start shopping at a different store so I could at least guarantee that they would have a working "car" cart for us each time.  Otherwise, it never worked.  They either have to both sit, or both walk.  DD cannot be left out or she freaks.  DS knows better and is so naughty.  I apologized/made jokes about them to so many people last time that it wasn't even funny.  I always bring them a treat bag and then I have had to start bribing with gummies that they will get when we survive and make it to the car only IF they have been good.  It is 50/50 and because I don't tell them until they are in the car, they can tantrum all they want.  It worked out well while DS was in preschool because I would always go then.  I don't get how one kid is easy and 2 kids feels like 20 when I am trying to shop, but it is like that almost every time!

DeniseRN

What about playing on your phone or some sort of toy? My 3yo DS does really well if he can play the Leap Frog app while I'm shopping. He only gets to Play on it while I'm shopping,so its a treat for him.