Doula for mid-Aug birth? Or other suggestions? Help!!

kellibelliblue

We are due Aug 17th, and delivering at the Birth Center in Bryn Mawr.

We are interested in hiring a doula, but not exactly as a birth attendant. Our situation is that we have a 4-year old who wishes to attend the birth, but TBC has a policy that any children need to have their own support person separate from the labouring mother's support person. We have zero family in the area (the closest is 6 hours and my last labour was 3, so the math doesn't really work out ), no close friends, one of our baby sitters won't be back in town until after the due date, and one we haven't used in a year and have been having trouble reconnecting with. So even if our daughter weren't coming, we don't exactly have a place for her to go. 

We're trying to work out a way to get some family into town for the weeks around the due date, but for all the potentials, some combination of the following apply: a) they'd need to stay in our 1 bedroom apartment with us (for weeks?!), b) they can't make it until it's too late/will only be available for post-partum support, c) we'd have to pay for all their expenses including gas to travel here, d) they won't commit, and/or e) they're sort of horrible and we're not sure we actually want them around anyway (ahem, *cough*mom*cough*). Needless to say, it's getting pretty stressful, and would likely be stressful even if we could get someone to commit to being in town.

 We're thinking that hiring a doula might be a good idea, because then DH and the doula could switch off between supporting me or supporting our daughter. But would a doula go for that? I'd rather have my husband be my support person, since he wasn't able to be there for our daughter's birth, but I can see how a doula might be miffed at the idea of being relegated to the role of baby-sitter.

 So yeah, what do you guys think of this idea? Can anyone see a better alternative? We've been wracking our brains, and aren't getting anywhere.  If this does seem like the way to go, where do we start looking for one? How much do they go for around here? Is there even enough time to meet with/hire one?

 Any helpful input is greatly appreciated. Thanks!

cmwither

I originally hired my doula to be my husband's support person, so why not for a child!   I don't think she'd feel like she was a babysitter- I would consider it supporting the family. I can't remember exactly what we paid- I think around $500 b/c she had applied for cert but didn't have it yet.

 You didn't ask for a referal, but we used Angela Konin and loved her!

https://www.bellamotherhood.com/

MAprincess

If you are up front with the doula then she might go for it.

Another option is making a list of other people in your life that could come over on short notice (friends in the area, etc) or also looking into other babysitters in the area and inviting them over a few times in the next month to get to know your DD.

Those are just some less expensive options.  I know doulas (because of certifications they have) can be pricey.  www.wellbornbaby.com is one that I know in the area that is recommended a lot but I think they are more in the $800 range.  Not positive with that, so you should contact them to check.

hmontty

We loved our doula with DD, but unfortunately, we ended up with a planned C-section for medical reasons, so we didn't actually use her for the birth.

HOWEVER, my surgical nurse was actually also a doula in her off time, and she was amazing. She was like my light during the most terrifying few hours of my life so far. I would never have been able to get through it without her, and I am terrified that I won't have her this time (because we have since moved out of state -- used to live in NJ).

So yeah, in my personal experience, doulas are awesome.

You could check out DONA.org, which lists doulas by state and town, and start interviewing. You really just want someone with whom you feel comfortable.