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Blended Families
DH at wits end
My DH is about at his wits end. BM just texted him with a nasty text about how he better not forget that he has to pay her again and that he'd better give her her money tomorrow.
This has never been an issue, he always pays child support. I guess she thinks that since there was a "no CS" order for the last year that she thinks he would forget?!?!?!
So he told her that he didn't forget and that he was sticking the check in the mail. Well, she got pissy and told him that if she didn't have her money by the end of the day tomorrow that she would go to DHHS and have his account frozen.
Technically he says that she could do this. The court granted her $400 in back support, and then he has to pay another $600 directly to DHHS. This was just ordered a couple weeks ago. But he told me that she can say he isn't paying and that DHHS will go in an freeze his account until they get all the back support. She would totally do something like this just to make it even more impossible for us to pay our bills.
He told her to never ever contact him about child support ever again. She is to direct ALL financial communication through our lawyer.
On top of that, she had both kids call him and leave messages asking for items that don't belong to them that are here at our house. His son wants us to give him a bed set and curtains that were mine before DH and I got married. His daughter wants me to give her a bunch of my craft stuff.
These people live their lives like they are entitled to whatever they want, without having to lift a finger to work for anything. While DH and I are busting our butts just to not lose our home.
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Re: DH at wits end
If he doesn't want her to contact him again, he should not respond to those text messages.
I don't know what your arrangement is, but if BM is texting to be hostile, I would ignore them. She will learn eventually that she won't get a reaction through that medium.
I would LOVE if he did go through DHHS to pay her. I don't think we have a CS office in Maine, except DHHS.
Since she isn't receiving housing benefits (wait ten minutes and that will change) he can pay her directly. He pays her with a check so that the bank has the cancelled check AND he uses carbon copy, so he can show anyone.
She isn't threatening to say he isn't paying, she is threatening to say that he isn't paying the back support. The CO just got changed a couple weeks ago and the court granted her almost $400 in back support. She says it's $500, but if you take $133 and times it by 3 you get $399. He pays $133 a week and she got granted 3 weeks of back support. So I don't know where she is getting $500.
Anyways. He told her that he doesn't have the whole amount of back support and that he will pay her payments when he can. She agreed, but will hold it over his head as a threat until it's paid off and she doesn't have a leg to stand on.
When we first got married I told him this too. He said it wouldn't work, but I didn't believe him. One day when she started being nasty via text he looked and me and said "I won't answer her back, just watch what happens"
From there on out for the next 5 hours he got a text every five minutes!! Eventually she also started calling and when he didn't answer she would text right after she got his voicemail. Finally he said "Okay now watch this" He texted her a short message about whatever it was she though was so important and told her to leave him the hell alone. His phone was silent from her the next two weeks.
So it is much quicker to tell her that he remembers and to not text him. :-)
UGH