My birth story and some advice (long)

JaiMacreiberts

This is a little late, seeing as how the kid is almost 3 months old, but I felt like I should share:

I got to be one of the lucky few whose water broke before labor started. I was sitting in the truck in the Walmart parking lot at around 6 PM when I felt a little pop and a little gush.  DH thought I was joking, but he soon went into a very cute panic about getting me to the hospital.  I told him that we had time to go home, let me change, get the bags and then make the 1 hour drive to our hospital.

I got checked in and they got my antibiotics started (GBS+)  They hooked me up to the monitor while the antibiotics ran, just to get an initial strip.  When I finally got unhooked from everything, I got in the shower and let the warm water help with the contractions.

Around midnight I decided to get out of the shower.  I was all wrinkly and was tired of standing/squatting.  I laid down in the bed and had a little more monitoring.  I was able to breathe through the contractions, but started feeling a little sick to my stomach.  The monitor was taken off and I got a little rest.

Around 5AM I could no longer rest and was moving around.  My OB requested that I go back on the monitor for another 20 minutes.  I agreed and that's when I noticed that things weren't right.  LO's heart rate was dropping VERY low during each contraction.  My OB asked if we could try a few things.  We tried refilling my uterus, thinking that maybe LO was on her cord and it was getting compressed during the contractions.  No dice.  I got some kind of drug (sorry, not sure what) to get her heart rate back up.  That worked, and I thought we were back on our way.  My OB requested that I stay on the monitor, however, just to be sure.  I agreed to it.

At 8AM, my OB came back in my room and told me that she didn't like what she had been seeing.  LO's heart rate was still dropping during each contraction and then going progressively higher after.  I was only at a 6 and she thought I had several hours of labor still ahead of me.  She told me that she would be OK with me laboring and delivering LO vaginally, as long as I was aware that there was a chance at an emergency c-section or we could go ahead with the c-section.  She told me that a prolonged labor could tire out my baby's heart and that we'd have to get her out ASAP, but never tried to scare me into thinking that my baby would die if I didn't do exactly what she told me to do.  She told me to buzz her when I'd decided, to take my time, then left the room.  DH and I talked it over and decided to go for the c-section.  I was disappointed that I wasn't going to have the natural birth I had worked and planned for, but I was pretty calm about the whole thing.

Once LO was out, her pediatrician became concerned with her color and the sound of her heartbeat.  As it turns out, LO had an undiagnosed severe heart defect.  (She is now fine and healthy after surgery)

I say all of that to say this: if you have ANY doubts about your caregiver, find someone new.  I disliked my original OB and didn't trust him.  I thought he would push me for a c-section for his own convenience.  The hospital he delivered at was very unfriendly toward natural birth.  I switched at 30 weeks and that switch saved my baby's life.  Because I trusted my OB, I knew she wasn't trying to get me to have a c-section for her own profit or convenience and I trusted her advice.  Bad things can happen and you need to know that your caregiver wants to intervene because they truly think it is necessary, not because they like interventions.  

I wasn't sure if I should switch OB's so late in my pregnancy, but, I'm glad I did.  Even though I still didn't get the natural birth I wanted, I know it was because it was necessary and not because my doctor could not be trusted.  It truly helped me be at peace with the way my baby was born.

And please, NO ONE take this as a "if your doctor says you need to do something, don't question it or you'll be risking your baby's life" because that isn't how it is at all.  This is about finding a caregiver you can trust.  I've seen lots of women on this board asking if they should switch doctors, and I think the answer is "YES!" 99% of the time.  If you don't trust your caregiver, you risk not having the best possible birth experience.

Good luck to you all!

pugznploons

I am so glad she is healthy!  how scary for you guys.

and I totally agree about having a doc you can trust.   

zaramarie81

Wow thanks for sharing! I totally "get" how that trust relationship can really make a huge difference. I am so glad your baby girl is just fine and that your OB was able to give you the best options in the midst of being unsure of what was going on!

mystrana

Congratulations! I think I agree with all that is is great advice to be able to trust your caregiver so that you're having a conversation rather than an argument when it comes to giving birth, if that makes sense. (It's not that early, but I haven't had breakfast yet!)

Peppita27

How awesome that your OB presented your options in that manner! It sounds like you made a great choice in your caregiver. So happy things turned out well for your family! Congrats!

mAnYaSha

Thanks for sharing and congrats on your little one !

robyn2201

ICarriedAWatermelon:

Thank you for sharing. Congratulations on your beautiful Lily!

I also agree that is is so important to have a provider that you can trust. It's the cornerstone of any relationship. However, I come from the medical field, and I have never known a physician to make a decision for his or her "profit or convenience." To do so would be antithetical to the tenets of the profession. If that were true or even suspected, that provider would have a lot of answering to do. It's sad that there has been such a culture of mistrust breeding between women and their obstetricians lately.

I am not trying to start anything but want to explain how mistrust can start between a patient and their provider. When pregnant with my DD, I told my OB that I would like to have a natural birth. Her response was... that's fine if you want. We can do a heplock but you have to have CFM. It's hospital policy. Your baby could die if you do IFM. We discussed a few other things and left our appointment.

When my water broke and I got to the hospital, I requested IFM and the nurse said that's perfectly fine and that they could do that. It wasn't hospital policy for CFM. So it turns out my OB had blantly lied to my face and pulled the dead baby card. Can I really trust her after that... no and we are switching. Yes, she may truely believe that CFM is better for the baby, but she shouldn't have lied about it being hospital policy.

OP: Congratulations on your little girl and good for you for finder a provider that you trusted.

caligirldar

Wow! I'm glad everything turned out ok. Thanks for sharing.