Trying to get DH on board to CD

KaycieBerchiolli

I want to use gDiapers CD system.  My DH immediately did the "I am not putting that in my washer" and "I asked (insert random friends name) and they didn't use cloth diapers! They know people who tried and no one stays with it. They all switch."  I pointed out that we will use about 7,000 disposable diapers before our LO is potty trained. My dad fully supports my choice and actually recommended it due to cost and that DH and I try to be super eco-friendly.  I even started my dad on recycling a few years ago. I don't know how to get DH on board when even being eco-friendly isn't doing it.  I explained gDiapers has disposable inserts you can throw out when we are in public and that if LO doesn't crap all over the inside and have a blow out of some kind we don't have to change the shell every time.  I feel like because his friends don't do it, he won't. How did you get your DH on board?

emsrdh03

Have you done a cost comparison for him?  Some men are more receptive to the money savings than the eco-friendly benefits.

 Unless you plan on only using the disposable GDiaper inserts, at which point they actually cost more than traditional sposies.

If the poop thing is really an issue, you could compromise and say you will pre-rinse all poopy diapers first.  Once they hit solids you have to anyways.

KaycieBerchiolli

I would only use the disposables for when we are out in public, which would not be much at first anyway.  I had mentioned dumping out and rinsing diapers first (knowing we'd have to a few months in anyway, and this grossed him out even more than simply washing them.  And then he still didn't want them in the washer. I offered to take them to the laundry mat if that was the real issue. I did the money comparison.  He was coming on board slowly until he asked his friends who have kids.  I registered for cloth and refuse to register for anything else!  I can't sit on an environmental board and then just add to landfills.

Sometimes I just want to say, "You're 35, its just poop, get over it!" I am not sure how he thinks he won't have to touch poop with disposable diapers. He doesn't want plastic bottles because of chemicals, but LO can sit, pee, and crap in chemical filled disposables all day.

LilBlkDress1

show him a video of someone changing and washing a cloth diaper.  There are a lot so find a good one first.  there are also a countless amount of blog articles on the subject of washing CD's, this is one of the things that helped H, I'd send little bits from a blog that just said how NB poop is water soluble and leaves NOTHING in the washer.  There are also disposable liners (they look like dryer sheets) that you can put in the diaper, most of the poop would go on that and then you can just toss the liner in the toilet and wash the diaper.  Although I wouldn't do this until after the baby starts solid foods since before then there is just no need.

With him talking to friends, this is H's big annoyance.  He'll tell people at work and they're pretty negative "ew you're going to be touching poop" and so on...  remind your H that they don't do CDs, they haven't researched it like you have and the obviously don't know about how they work.  These friends are just commenting on a concept that they know nothing about. 

emsrdh03

Have you given him any articles about the nasty stuff in diapers?  Like the fact that the chemical that caused TSS in tampon users and has been banned for years is still used in diapers?

 Has he asked his friends how many times their child has had a blowout diaper and that poop in your washing machine is just a fact of life with kids?

I guess what it boils down to is the person who will be doing the majority of the diaper changes and laundry really should get to choose.  Maybe suggest doing a trial where you have little money invested so he could see it's not so bad?

HannahO28

The cost savings is what did in my DH--and now he love cloth diapering even more than I do. 

He should probably know that if he's having a baby, he just going to have to get over poop. EBF poop isn't as bad as adult poop--it doesn't smell as bad and it washes out of things easy.

And I don't know if you've heard this before, but Gdiapers have a pretty bad reputation. They're not the most cost-effective or the easiest system out there. There are really much better options, and if you're trying to convince someone else to CD, I think you should probably go with something a little easier to figure out 

Aurora_Borealis

The whole 'no poop in the washing machine' argument does not make a lot of sense in reality. If you use sposies you will undoubtedly have poop in your washing machine (due to poopy clothes), and on your carseat, and in your stroller, etc, etc unless you end up with a baby who miraculously does not blow out of disposables. Babies poop. A lot. Cloth actually makes it more manageable, IMO.

Anyway, agree with PP that you can start spraying from the start to make the argument a non-issue (though this just makes a lot more unnecessary work).

As far as getting my DH on board, he was a CD baby back in the 70s and he loves to save money. So there wasn't a lot of convincing.  For the record, our washing machine does not smell like poop.

Also, do a little more research before fully committing to gDiapers. They work well for some, but many people loathe them due to leaks. I didn't consider them because I thought their 3-part system was unnecessarily complicated. Other systems have just one part (like an AIO) or two (pockets, PFs & covers, etc). If you want to compare other options with a disposable element, check out Grovia and Flips.

 

welly01

My main way of convincing DH was financial.  We've decided to do prefolds, at least to start just to spend as little money as possible.  He also had the same objection of poop in the washer.  Remind him that kids are going to get poop and throw-up on all their clothes anyway, so that is not a valid argument.  Disposables have blowouts all the time, so dealing with poop in general is just going to be a new reality regardless of cloth or disposable.  He finally agreed to "let" me do it, but still wasn't committed to it like I wanted him to be.  I finally pretty much forced him to watch a few YouTube videos and he saw that it was no big deal.  Then he started doing his own research and found all the stuff about chemicals, rashes, and blowouts.  Now he is fully on board with cloth diapering (I'm so excited!!!).  Just keep working on him and reminding him that its important to you and you need his full support.

LuluP82

What everyone else said. You'll get poop and pee in the washing machine all the time with a baby, trust me!

We still use disposables when we're out of town (we travel a lot and it's not always somewhere where it would make sense to use cloth. I tried gro via thinking the disposable insert would work and HATED them, so we just suck it up and use disposables when we're out of town). Fact is, the baby smells in the disposable diapers. I can smell when he poops and pees in the disposables and I can't in the cloth. That just shows the chemicals are just funky and weird! 

kimbo1216

We started out using sposies.  When I brought up CDs, DH was adamantly opposed.  After a few months on sposies and realizing she was constantly broken out from them, her sitter started using her CD's on DD.  Her rash cleared right up.  So we started the switch.  DH, still skeptical, was cool with me getting just a few (I ordered 2 Kawaiis) and the sitter lent us some of hers.  Then, as he saw it wasn't so bad, I ordered more and more.  Now, I have a stash of 19 pockets, a dozen prefolds & 2 covers, and 3 AIOs.  I love it and DH doesn't mind it.  He even helps we spray the poopies and will do wash if I need.

So I guess my advice is to start slow and ease him in.  Once he sees them and sees what they are really like, he may just change his mind.  

Ps...here's a pic of DD in her latest diaper I got with DH specifically in mind.  It's a Star Wars diaper!  So maybe you could get some that he specifically would like too.

 

kmhunt11

People might flame me for this, but I didn't give him a choice.  I stocked the CDs, and stopped buying disposables.  Once he got used to them, he's fine.  He sprayed out 1 poop diaper, and said he won't do it again, but I'm sure if he didn't work so damn much he would.  He's still not great at putting them on (we have a bunch of one-size, and there are a ton of snaps),  but he's actually fine with our gdiapers, which are my favorites, too.  Maybe we've been married so long, or maybe we just have a unique relationship, but I didn't feel the need to get him to sign off on it.  I made a responsible choice that I felt pretty strongly about and went with it.  He chose not to push back, so it worked out

DiamondDani

Money. I became a SAHM & we needed a way to save money from the loss of my income. That was the #1 factor for both of us. Although DH was more interested in CD than I was. I thought it was gross. Ha! But now that we're doing it, it's not nearly as gross as I thought it would be. It's also easier than I thought. (we use pockets) but above all else I love the money we are saving. DH actually tells people we CD & tries to recruit others to do the same. 

moosebaby2011

I also got DH on board based on the cost factor.  Additionally, the thought of all those diapers in landfills really, really grosses him out.

lageorgiapaperie

I just kept at it. He knew I was interested while pregnant but b/c of our laundry situation we didn't CD until 6 months. At that time I was confident I could handle it. He wasn't really on board, but said we could give it a try. I think he thought I'd throw in the towel quickly.

But here we are 2.5 months later and we're still CDing. I love it, and he has warmed up to it a whole lot. About a month ago he stopped reaching for a Huggies automatically, and will only do it now on occasion if he thinks DS is going to poop. 

We were at the pool this morning and DH actually brought up CDs himself and said he was trying to find us a certain diaper that we both think is adorable (Tots Bots London print-- of course sold out everywhere). I couldn't believe it! 

We didn't do a trial but I think that might be the way to go for you guys. Try out all the different kinds and just keep talking about all the positives. Check out YouTube for some great CD videos, mamanatural has a great CD video series that is done by her husband actually.

GL

kezias

We started with the gdiapers and they are cute. But I am pretty sure I didn't save any money using them. You have to buy new sizes as LO grows. He grew out of the smalls at 10 weeks (I only used them on my days off 3 days a week). I lost interest in cloth for a couple weeks then got to looking at other options. I ended up getting 2 BG freestyles and 2 BG 4.0. I've had them a week and ordered more. I told my husband I wanted to try something new and he liked the idea of only getting a few to try. The other night when I came home from work he had picked LO up from grandmas and put him in a freestyle. That's when I ordered more. Still working on grandparents. Thought about just sending him in one and then maybe they will have too:)

bugandbibs

PPs gave some good advice, but I say- do what you want.  If you want to CD, buy some CDs and do it.  Do the washing yourself.  If he wants to use disposables, then he can buy them, put them in the trash, and wash everything that has a blowout. Why does he get to dictate what you will do?

There is no reason you have to be all or nothing.  Eventually, he will come around.  Or not, but you will still save money and keep some sposies out of the landfill.

freezorburn

We were renovating our house and living in temp housing when expecting our DS, so DH convinced me to put off CD initially. Then he started a new job in another country when DS was 2 weeks old and we are lucky to have him home for a week a month. And we were burning through 3-4 big packs of sposies a week, which was disgusting.

So I went and ordered the CD trial from Jillian's Drawers, and it went well, so I just told DH we would be doing CDs, except for maybe when we are traveling. DH resisted a little bit on his next trip home, so we talked about it: Are they too complicated? No, it's the laundry and it's easier to just throw a diaper in the trash (and before he was on board with both the cost savings and the environmental argument, but now he cites convenience). So I tell him I'll take care of the laundry. Bottom line, DS sleeps better in cloth which means I sleep better. And since DH isn't around most of the time his opinion only counts for so much anyway.

Katechavez

I convinced DH by doing a diaper trial first. He was willing to try it to 'prove me wrong'. We did the trial and we ended up loving it and he was on board. This will also let you experiment with several different types of diapers. I know most diaper sites do one but I used diaperdaisy.com. GL!

KaycieBerchiolli

Thanks!  I will look into Flips.  I started off looking at BumGenius and then I watched a video on how you put them together and the baby goes to the bathroom on the actual diaper with a cloth tucked inside it...which meant changing the shell every time.  I knew he'd never go for that and honestly, I wasn't a fan of needing a ton of shells.  Last time I used cloth diapers was on my younger siblings and they still took pins.  I was so happy to see they had changed the designs now, gDiapers is just the one that is at BabiesRus here and can be put on our registry.  I'm not absolutely sold on that brand, just the way the cloth is put in as opposed to BumGenius.  Flips seems to be the same design idea. I'll keep researching brands, as long as the outer shell doesn't have to be changed each time I will have a better chance selling him on it.  

KaycieBerchiolli

In reply to:  kimbo1216 

 DH does not like the idea of pocket diapers due to the amount of laundry it will create.  How well do the Kawaii's work when it's just a cover and a prefold?

MomEofThree

Men like simplistic options- my husband won't use our thirsties or flats but loves our one size elites from fuzzibunz

 

 Hey there - I am wanting to help "  mentor" a newbie to getting into the wonderful world of cloth - if you want to email me at my personal email I can answer any questions you have as well as give you a list of a ton of diapers I have tried them all and know the differences I have 3 kids and am a fuzzibunz affiliate currently using my 24 fuzzibunz one size elites and LOVE THEM- even using cloth wipes - I would live to help you start saving some green and start a stash  

Catchawave133105@aol.com

https://sales.myfuzzibunz.com/SHDa

IgnatusDem

DH was on board as soon as he saw the savings.  Plus since we didn't start CDing till our son was about 2 weeks old, we were burning through disposables so fast and it was a pain to have to run out to the store every time we noticed he was running out (which is ALL the time in the newborn stage.) It's much easier to throw a load of laundry in the wash rather then try to get to the store before you run out of diapers.

Also the blowouts in disposables are way grosser then washing cloth diapers.  I touch less poop when he's in cloth then when he's in disposable diapers.