12+ hour car ride too long with an almost 4 month old?

KMalmquist

We are planning on traveling to my parents over the holidays but I am not sure if driving 12.5 hours with a not-quite-4-month-old is going to be doable or just sheer stupidity.  Has anyone else out there done it?  

We are toying with the idea of breaking it up into 2 days but then we'd be looking at driving the better part of 4 days there and back.  That almost doesn't seem worth it.  Ideas, suggestions, comments, concerns?  I'd love to hear your input.  Thanks!

runrinserepeat

That's too long, IMO. The five hour car ride to MIL's last week was pushing it for our 4.5 month old.

mclere

kleMcK:

That's too long, IMO. The five hour car ride to MIL's last week was pushing it for our 4.5 month old.

That just seems too long. Can you just fly?

shaket83

The only way I would even attempt it would be do drive overnight so that your LO would ideally be sleeping almost the whole time (if he is STTN). Otherwise, like you said it doesn't sound worth it. 

krispy83

That would be way too long for us.  DS can handle about 1-1 1/2 hours in his carseat before he starts to melt down.  We recently did a 2 hour trip and one of us sat in the backseat to entertain/calm him when he wasn't sleeping.  But even then, after 2 hours, he was DONE.  Anything longer than that and we would have had to include a break somewhere (stopping for lunch, playtime, etc.).  I would not attempt a 12 hour drive.  Can you fly?  We just did a 4 1/2 hour flight with DS and that was super easy.

amber31288

KMalmquist:

We are planning on traveling to my parents over the holidays but I am not sure if driving 12.5 hours with a not-quite-4-month-old is going to be doable or just sheer stupidity.  Has anyone else out there done it?  

We are toying with the idea of breaking it up into 2 days but then we'd be looking at driving the better part of 4 days there and back.  That almost doesn't seem worth it.  Ideas, suggestions, comments, concerns?  I'd love to hear your input.  Thanks!

we did it. it was not THAT bad. if you feel you need to/should do it, don't let others sway you. we had to go see my SD who lives 12 hours away from us when DD was 2 months old. we held off til 2 months because we figured any time before that was just too much. i worried and worried and worried about it, but with all the stuff we had to take with us, there is no way we could fly! so anyway, we usually drive overnight to beat traffic & it works well with my husbands work schedule. when we do this, he doesnt have to use a vacation day. we left our house around 6:30-7 at night and before we did, we did our normal bedtime routine with DD. It was about an hour earlier than we would usually put her to bed, but it pretty much worked. bath, pj's and bottle, then put her in her carseat and we were off. we hardly heard a peep out of her the ENTIRE drive! i think i put her paci back in her mouth a couple times and she would stir when we stopped for gas but never actually woke! it was amazing. i attribute a lot of this to it being nighttime, and that she loves to sleep in the car. we drove straight through, and of course she was wide awake when we arrived at 6:30 am. that was the hardest part. someone had to stay up with her after we'd been driving all night.

on the way home, we left when she woke up for her middle of the night feeding. this was about 3:30 am (maybe 4:30 by the time we got on the road). we had to stop more often during the day to feed her and she wasn't sleeping as much, but we also had to stop for lunch for ourselves and such, so it worked out. she still slept more than i thought on the way home, but driving at night was way better.

that being said, she was 2 months then and they sleep a lot more at 2 months! we have done 6 hour drives with her as a 3-5 month old and she doesn't like to be in there for as long (unless its nighttime!). one of us has to sit in back and play with her.

sorry this has turned into a novel. it is possible to travel with a baby. i definetely recommend driving at night if you wanna make it straight through. a plus for you is, if you are going to visit family, if you drive overnight and need a nap when you get there, someone can probably watch LO for you. that would have been great for us! it won't be as bad as you think, i promise. just have all baby necessities close at hand as well.

runrinserepeat

amber31288:

KMalmquist:

We are planning on traveling to my parents over the holidays but I am not sure if driving 12.5 hours with a not-quite-4-month-old is going to be doable or just sheer stupidity.  Has anyone else out there done it?  

We are toying with the idea of breaking it up into 2 days but then we'd be looking at driving the better part of 4 days there and back.  That almost doesn't seem worth it.  Ideas, suggestions, comments, concerns?  I'd love to hear your input.  Thanks!

we did it. it was not THAT bad. if you feel you need to/should do it, don't let others sway you. we had to go see my SD who lives 12 hours away from us when DD was 2 months old. we held off til 2 months because we figured any time before that was just too much. i worried and worried and worried about it, but with all the stuff we had to take with us, there is no way we could fly! so anyway, we usually drive overnight to beat traffic & it works well with my husbands work schedule. when we do this, he doesnt have to use a vacation day. we left our house around 6:30-7 at night and before we did, we did our normal bedtime routine with DD. It was about an hour earlier than we would usually put her to bed, but it pretty much worked. bath, pj's and bottle, then put her in her carseat and we were off. we hardly heard a peep out of her the ENTIRE drive! i think i put her paci back in her mouth a couple times and she would stir when we stopped for gas but never actually woke! it was amazing. i attribute a lot of this to it being nighttime, and that she loves to sleep in the car. we drove straight through, and of course she was wide awake when we arrived at 6:30 am. that was the hardest part. someone had to stay up with her after we'd been driving all night.

on the way home, we left when she woke up for her middle of the night feeding. this was about 3:30 am (maybe 4:30 by the time we got on the road). we had to stop more often during the day to feed her and she wasn't sleeping as much, but we also had to stop for lunch for ourselves and such, so it worked out. she still slept more than i thought on the way home, but driving at night was way better.

that being said, she was 2 months then and they sleep a lot more at 2 months! we have done 6 hour drives with her as a 3-5 month old and she doesn't like to be in there for as long (unless its nighttime!). one of us has to sit in back and play with her.

sorry this has turned into a novel. it is possible to travel with a baby. i definetely recommend driving at night if you wanna make it straight through. a plus for you is, if you are going to visit family, if you drive overnight and need a nap when you get there, someone can probably watch LO for you. that would have been great for us! it won't be as bad as you think, i promise. just have all baby necessities close at hand as well.

2 months and 4 months are totally different. DD was a dream during a 4 hour car ride at 2 months. At 4 months, it's a scream fest.

waltzingmatilda13

We just did an 8 hour trip last week and it wasn't bad at all. Both times we were in the car during the day. I sat in back to entertain DS and was able to feed him in his carseat. We stopped for burping and diaper changing, but we only really had to stop 2 times. He slept most of the time and was just awake and happy the rest. I don't know if it applies to you, but I brought my nursing top and was able to pump while DH drove and feed fresh bottles so we never had to worry about warming a bottle. I also brought toys and a pacifier so we never had a meltdown. 

I think you really just need to evaluate your baby and what will and will not work for them. Every baby is going to be different, as evidenced by the vastly different experiences shown in this thread.  

KaliChick

It all depends on your kid but I think that's definitely pushing it. My kid at 3.5 months would never make it.  He'd be melting down big time.  We might make it if it was at night, but even then I'm not so sure.

We drove with my now almost 3 year old niece to Arizona (about a 5.5 hour drive) when she was about 5 months old.  She did okay but one of us had to sit back there with her and entertain.  We also stopped a couple of times.

It's doable, it just might be tough and then again, it might be easy.  I'd look into flying if at all possible.

LuckyBride06

A 12 hour ride with my DS would be a nightmare!! He can't even handle an hour carride without screaming for most of it! He HATES the carseat. It depends on your baby though. I wouldn't attempt it, even if my DS actually liked the car.

Pumpkin62307

We did a 15 hour trip when DS was 6 months old. It wasn't bad at all. We drove overnight on the way there, we left about 7pm and stopped to feed and change him about 9:30 or so, then he slept until about 5am, which is the first time he really fussed, but we were going through some mountains, so I think his ears were probably bothering him. We stopped for about 30 minutes to eat, stretch, and give him a break from the carseat,and then reached our destination a few hours later. We drove during the day on the way back, and he still did a lot better than I thought, still slept most of them time, and we just fed him in the carseat.

So I highly suggest driving overnight, and have someone at your destination willing to watch him so you can gets some sleep when you get there.

footnotegirl

Add about 1/3 of that. Remember, you'll have to be stopping frequently to change and feed the baby as well, can't do that in the moving car.

Take a plane, train, or bus. A drive of over about 4 hours with an infant just isn't an efficient use of time or money.

elektra1835

Lurker here. I think a lot of people are over reacting just a little, but it really does depend on the baby and like a PP mentioned, you will have to decide if your individual child will be able to handle it. We took an 8hr car drive at 4mo, but did it at night so that he was sleeping all the way up there. He woke once to eat and then we fed him once we reached our destination. He was much more fussy on our way home, but I think that had a lot to do with the fact that he lived in his carseat that weekend and by the time we left, he was just done. We would take a 12hr trip if we had to, but personally I think it would be pushing it for us. I would think it's doable, just probably not very pleasant. Good luck in your decision.

sharrow

I have to agree with the pp that some people might be over-reacting.  We made plenty of trips with DS when he was that young, and are planning an 8 hour trip in two weeks with a 3 year old and DD who will be almost four months. 

Definitely add extra time to your trip to rest.  I think 30% to total time was a good number. 

 Also, in my experience, stop when you need to.  Even if it is "only 30 more minutes"  to your destination.  You never know when you are going to hit traffic and be delayed.

futuremrso'

We have done it twice, at 2 months and 4 months. Both times we did it through the night so he would sleep through most of it. At 4 months I fed him before we left and then once when he would normally wake up. No problem at all!