tell me its ok...

mrsW706

i am dreading going back to work in January. Every time I think about it, I get a stomachache. I know that in today's world, its just a way of life and I can accept that and I know i CAN do it..I am just worried about how I am going to feel when January 5 rolls around and I have to get up, drop off DD at the babysitter's and get back into the working routine. I fully trust the babysitter and I am thrilled that she is watching DD so its not that I dont think she'll be ok..Im more worried about me! LOL

Tell me how/why its ok...tell me that you dont miss out on their lives and that DD will still want to come to me at the end of the day...and that I wont be too tired to give her 1000000% of me. ( I am a teacher and I will be gone for a total of 8hrs per day 5 days/week) I know its a great schedule, but that doesn't make it easier for me.?

So, can all you working moms make me feel better?? Please don't flame. I am fully aware that I'm the luckiest person on earth to have a beautiful family, baby and life. Just looking for some reassurance. )?

kickenb

You definately won't get flamed.  I think everyone on this board had the same feelings you did before going back.

I have been back for one week now.  For weeks I was dreading it, crying, an emotional wreck thinking about having to leave my baby every day to go to work.  The night before I stared I was so nauseous I was dry heaving.  I worked myself up so much I couldn't even sleep.  I cried the morning I left.  But once I got to work, it was so much better.  

Yeah, it's hard leaving him every day.  I can't tell you that I don't miss out on his life, because I do.  I miss being with him terribly.  But I'm starting to get into a routine of heading to work every day.  I know for me, once I"m there I'm so busy with work that the day goes by so quickly.  I keep lots of pictures at my desk and am constantly looking at them.

I can tell you one thing, the anticipation of going back to work is far worse than actually going back.  So try not to think about it too much.  Enjoy every day you have with DC and I promise it won't be as bad as what you are anticipating it to be. 

marrymemylove

Honestly I couldn't WAIT to get back to work. I really did not like being a SAHM. And even I felt sad leaving him at daycare. You will get some of your life back at work and realise that the world outside still exists and is fun.

E C

You won't get any flames here.  It's not easy being a supermom.

I find that DD thrives in day care, and working makes me a better mom.  At day care, she gets the stimulation needed for her development that I can't quite offer at home.  She also gets peer pressure, which at this age is a good thing.  DD wants to do what her friends are doing, which include walking and eating new things.  I can only believe that the same will hold true when it comes time to potty train...

It makes me a better mom because I enjoy my time with her more.  Because I get the adult interaction that I know I need, I am more able to focus on interacting with her when we're together.  I know that I will be a role model for DD as she grows up; she'll see that I am Mom, and I am still Emily too.  I can do both, and I can do both well.

Try to remember that it's about quality time, not quantity time.  It will get easier as the days go by.  And that smile when you pick her up so amazing.  You are Mom, and you will always be Mom.

Maybride2

Ditto everything single thing that MTUEm said, in spades.

I was really nervous and upset about going back to work.  I cried the entire drive into work after dropping DS off at daycare that first day.  But by lunchtime, I really felt "normal" again.......more normal than I had in a long time.

I'm not going to lie and say that I don't miss him while I'm at work, because I do.  But I didn't realize how much I missed and needed adult interaction and stimulation when I was at home with him FT.  And DS is absolutely thriving at daycare - I often feel guilty on the weekends because I can't offer him the same level of stimulation that he gets every weekday with his teachers and his friends. 

DS gives me a hug and waves to me when I drop him off, and toddles over as quickly as he can to hug and kiss me when I pick him up.  I feel like the quality of our time together is better than it would be otherwise, due in large part because I don't take it for granted and I have more patience.

Going back to work is not the end of the world.

beenbizzy

I could have written exactly what MTUm and Maybride said word for word!  The anticipation was worse than the actual act.  The night before I went back I sat in the rocking chair and held him and sobbed.  DH was way concerned for me!  Getting back into a routine was good for me and good for our family. 

DS loves daycare and loves his friends.  There are times I think he is bored when he is just home with me and DH.  Daycare loves him so much, I know they give him the best care they can.

There have been a few days lately that he has been sad when I dropped him off, but I think that is just a stage.  When I get there to pick him up his face lights up and he is super excited to see me. 

Here's my best tip:  Can your DH drop off for a few weeks in the beginning?  Mine did because of my commute, but in hindsight, I think that was the best way for me not to be a blubbering mess (well, more than I was). 

JLSBWG

Yes, I definately agree with the previous people.  The anticipation was worse than the reality.  The first week for me was the toughest and then it got easier.  Having a good daycare situation is key.  My DS loves his teachers and is thriving there, so that it makes it easier for me to leave him.  I make sure that the time we spend together is all about him.  So, quality of time is most important.  I am excited for DS having a good school experience so young, that I think his transition to elementary school will be easier.  My DS loves people and other kids, so I think daycare has helped his social skills even at 10 months old.  Enjoy the rest of your maternity leave and try not to think about it.  I know that is hard, but remember that you are a good mother and are doing what's best for your family.   Your DS will do just fine!

ka2005

Hi, I feel your pain. ?I have been back for two weeks now.

?Anticipation is the worst. ?I too felt sick to my stomach, and guilty that I didn't figure out how to be home longer.??I wish I was home with my baby, but she seems happy and that makes me feel so much better. ??

I am beat when I get home, but know I am in the home stretch and get about 4 good hours playing, feeding and bathing my child. ?So I always go to bed warm and fuzzy having spent quality time with my little one. ?And, as tough as it is I now appreciate the midnight feedings bc I get to be with my baby!?

And just remember, You are the Mommy and your baby will always love you best:-)?

tiff16

It's never easy but once you start working keep busy.  I'm a teacher too and when I spend my day focused on my students I feel a little better.