Questions to Moms who have done this before...

Andrea+David

I'm expecting my first in March and I am very interested in having a natural birth in the hospital mainly because when my mom was having me she got pain killers and it stopped her labor, put me in distress so she was given Pitocin to start it up again so I would really like to avoid any issues of a similar nature... I'm a little nervous about it though because I've had several people (including my boyfriend and best friend) tell me they don't think I will be able to handle the pain (I have a very low pain threshold!!) and will give in to pain relief! My mother on the other hand thinks I will do great and has told me that focusing on the end goal of having a beautiful baby and that the pain won't go on forever helped her with her natural birth of my younger brother (she wasn't about to use pain killers with him after what happened when I was born!) So... My question is, what are somethings that I can do to help with the pain so I don't feel like I need to give in? My mom will not be in the room when the baby is born just my boyfriend and the medical staff!

PS. I know it is pretty early in my pregnancy but it is really on my mind! We are planning on doing Lamaze/birthing classes later on in my pregnancy!

tokenhoser

Check out the unofficial FAQ in my siggy.

Doing some classes and reading to gain confidence in natural birth and your body is good. Personally, I really enjoyed prenatal yoga and found the skills I knew from yoga really helpful (mostly being able to relax between contractions and focus during contractions, although I did use a few poses in my labour as well). 

anonsouthernbell

read some NB books..also you might want to look into bradley method classes (I havent heard very good things about lamaze) & look into hiring a doula

fyziksgirl

Hire a doula! Seriously, if you can, my doula was fantastic. Made a huge difference in my ability to go natural. If you can find a student doula they often work for free or cheap.

Also, have a serious talk with your boyfriend. You do NOT need someone there telling you to just get the epidural or asking if you want pain-meds mid-contraction. A calm, supportive environment is going to do wonders for your ability to relax and cope how you need to, one where you feel you have to defend yourself is going to make it very difficult. Talk through things with your boyfriend and make sure you're on the same page if he's going to be there. It might be helpful to come up with a code word. Until you give it he is not to, under any circumstances, suggest pain meds. That gives you something tangible.

Additionally, talk with your doctor. If your provider is supportive of natural birth (not just "OK with it" or "willing to let you try") it will make things much easier.

Those are my thoughts! 

KayaXavier

Find out what your hospital offers or allows you to utilize in the way of non-medicinal pain relief methods. I will have a shower and bathtub, birthing ball, squat bar and heated rice sacks for counter pressure massages. Also, find out their policy on refusing an IV and a fetal monitor so that you can move around freely, try different positions and walk. Good luck, don't let anyone tell you that you can't do it but also be gentle on yourself. If you end up needing medicinal pain relief, it's not a failure. Your birth experience should be joyful, not miserable. Whatever brings your child into the world safely and happily is what is meant to be for you and your family.

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I found a birth education class geared towards natural birth to be invaluable.  And I'm not talking the pathetic one that most hospitals (not all) offer. 

btartaroind

KayaXavier:

Find out what your hospital offers or allows you to utilize in the way of non-medicinal pain relief methods. I will have a shower and bathtub, birthing ball, squat bar and heated rice sacks for counter pressure massages. Also, find out their policy on refusing an IV and a fetal monitor so that you can move around freely, try different positions and walk. Good luck, don't let anyone tell you that you can't do it but also be gentle on yourself. If you end up needing medicinal pain relief, it's not a failure. Your birth experience should be joyful, not miserable. Whatever brings your child into the world safely and happily is what is meant to be for you and your family.

I would do this. A lot of hospitals have most of these things now a days, and they could be of use.

DON'T let anyone tell you that you can't handle the pain. I was the one who told myself that, I have a really low pain tolerance as well, so I ended up getting an epidural. Well the epidural completely wore off by the time I was getting regular contractions. The contractions were super intense, and I screamed like crazy during pushing, but to tell you the truth it was manageable. It is so intense, but your body's endorphins take care of you! It was definitely the worst pain of my life, don't get me wrong, but it is positive pain with such a sweet reward at the end. I loved being in control and in hind sight I am so glad the epi wore off, and I am definitely going med-free for my next.

But like PP said, there is nothing wrong with getting meds if you need it! Either way you are still delivering your baby!

kciriello

The most important thing is to prepare yourself mentally and emotionally, and commit to doing it naturally. It sounds like unfortunately you don't have great support other than your mom and it's really critical that YOU get yourself into a mental place where you feel convicted about having a natural birth, confident that your body knows exactly what to do, and prepared to manage the experience. I highly recomend good childbirth classes that focus on techniques to manage the birth experience - lamaze, hypnobirthing, Bradley, or any method that speaks to you. Hire a doula and get your boyfriend on board with this because his support will be critical.

Andrea+David

Thanks everyone for all the great advise... I do want to say after reading some of the responses and rereading my post I made my boyfriend sound like he is insensitive about the birth which he is not! He wants me to have whatever kind of birth I want and supports me in whatever I choose but he was just shocked that I wouldn't want pain meds because how I am with other pain! I did talk to him more about it today though and we agreed that when that time comes that he will support me in my decisions. We are also discussing maybe having my mom come in during some of my labor but I'm not sure still how I feel about that!

fellinginlove

I highly recommend "Ina May's guide to childbirth" as a must read!!! It is a very empowering book!  

kincaid44

Something that helped me out a lot was reading Ina May's Guide to Childbirth.  It gave me a lot of confidence, and totally changed my views on childbirth.  It made me less scared, and more excited about giving birth.  I also had planned on using a birthing tub to help with the pain of the contractions, but my labor was too fast so I wasn't able to use it.  

CurbsideProphet

DH watched the Business of Being Born with me and we took Bradley classes. I also did a lot of reading. I would just start researching and preparing as best you can.

We did hire a doula.

I would start discussing things with your provider now and determine if they are a good fit. If you do not have one yet, I would consider a midwife. Although some OBs are really open to pain-med free birth, so you may not feel the need to switch. 

Dandalf03

kincaid44:

Something that helped me out a lot was reading Ina May's Guide to Childbirth.  It gave me a lot of confidence, and totally changed my views on childbirth.  It made me less scared, and more excited about giving birth.  I also had planned on using a birthing tub to help with the pain of the contractions, but my labor was too fast so I wasn't able to use it.  

 

This- Ina May's book helped me a ton.  I also took Hypnobirthing which gave me a lot of confidence.  I too have a "low pain threshold" and my mom told me I would be begging for an epi, but I had a wonderful, med-free childbirth!