Natural Birth

I need a kick in the pants ladies

I need to write out my birth plan, at least I think I need to.  I've discussed the major points with my doctor already and he will be the one delivering her (he has no partners).  However I know he will only be there at the end and it's important to have stuff written out for the nurses.  

I am not asking for anything outrageous, just a pretty standard NB plan.  However I feel hesitant to write it.  I think part of me worries the nurses will judge me or roll their eyes at me (I know I shouldn't care) and part of me worries that I'll get push back from them at the hospital when i hand it over and have to deal with confrontation (or dh or my doula will have to).  

I have been planning to write a very positively worded birth plan and keep it short and to the point, but I am still feeling weird about it.   

I need to just suck it up, right?  It's my birth after all. 

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Gretchen Evie, born 7/8/2012 at 35w5d

Re: I need a kick in the pants ladies

  • Write it for yourself and your husband, and if you don't want to give it to the nurses, don't. You can, obviously, but the important thing is that you, DH, and your doula know what you want. Then you can just deal with things as they come up rather than present a laundry list if that makes you more comfortable.

    The only part I would definitely present in advance was any wishes you have for the newborn procedures/post birth (like delaying cord clamping or Hep B) as that part can happen more quickly in some hospitals.

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  • I am giving mine to the nurses at the hospital. I have also discussed it with my OB and doula.

    When it comes to NB and the hospital, a lot of what I have seen people written out (including yours in a thread below?) is assumed, or nothing the nurses care about anyways-- do they care if you choose your own music or turn down the lights? probably not.

    Maybe you can make two versions-- a long one for your people and a shorter one for the nursing staff? 

    Also a lot of stuff is pretty standard procedure that people write out in their birth plans, I left this out, unless it was extremely important to me to reiterate.

    I also wrote mine in bullet point form and kept it to a page, so it doesn't look like a huge set of demands. 


    IVF #1 ET 1 d3 embryo 10/30/11 BFP
    3 Embryos frozen (1 d5, 2 d6)

    DS born 07/29/12

    FET #1 ET 1 d5 embryo 02/10/15 BFN

    FET #2 1 d6 embryo didn't survive thaw, transferred last d6. CP :(

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  • If you are worried that the nurses will judge you, then maybe you could think about giving them something with the birth plan?  My HypnoBirthing instructor suggested that so that the nurses feel like you haven't thought only about yourself, but put some thought into them too.  She suggested Krispy Kreme donuts, but I think I'll take a big bag of candy for them, with a stack of copies of my birth plan. 

    HTH! 

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  • My CNM once told me, the L & D nurses either 'get it' or they don't.  So I think wanting a med-free birth and having a doula with you, is already setting the stage for an eye roll if they are in the camp of just not getting it.  My CNM also told me that the L & D nurses at the hospital I am at tend to align themselves with the patients that most fit their idea of what birth should be in their minds.  So perhaps by bringing your birth plan you are encouraging them to find you a nurse who will be supportive.  But either way, you are doing something a little different from the norm and those who are going to give you an eye roll will do it, birth plan or not!   

    So, yes, suck it up and write it :) 

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