I just had a total meltdown over nothing.

PnkDingo

So far this is my favorite part of pregnancy. /sarcasm

 

I have a -lot- of weird medical issues, some that are just unique and baffling to my PCP, others that people my age shouldn't have yet, and more that are just weird an annoying. 

I was diagnosed with PCOS at 16. I had a m/c at 22 (didn't know I was pg) with weird complications and iron deficits afterwards, and at 23 almost lost both ovaries to surgery because I had cyst clusters so large you could see the bulge on my abdomen. At 23 my PCP basically laid it out there that even if they weren't removed, the likelihood of me ever being able to conceive would be slim to none, and the likelihood of me being able to carry to term would be even slimmer. I still opted out of surgery, and strangely the cyst clusters remedied themselves within 4 months. By 25 I came to terms with never having children, stopped thinking about it,  and took on my role as kickass auntie like it was my job.

Obviously I got the whole conceiving thing down. It's the carrying to term I get paranoid about now. I was having a conversation with my mother and sister, and my sister brought up that when it's time for it, she wants to help plan the baby shower. My mother interjected and said it was a bad idea, that we should wait, because if we have one, if anything happens late in the game, it will be even more sad and hard to deal with. She wasn't saying it to be insensitive,  I completely understood where she was coming from (she's cautiously optimistic rather than happy/excited at this point, as am I), but thanks to awesome hormones, I welled up, stomped my foot like a 12 year old girl, and blurted out "That's not fair!" 

I've since put myself in time out, because I know I'm being crazy and irrational and WAY overly sensitive. It gets better, right?

CutieBean79

Awww, it's an emotional time.  Unfortunately, that doesn't change for a loooooong time, lol.

Mee83shell

I actually think you're NOT being irrational or crazy at all. I would be SO hurt if my mom said something like that to me. You can't live life thinking of the "what ifs" & things like that. I would have a heart to heart with your mom. Tell her that you can be irrational & crazy enough for the both of you, but you need her to be excited, enthusiastic, & positive...basically your cheerleader!!

::hugs:: I will keep you & your peanut in my prayers!!!

daisylove711

I would have cried too.  I feel like I already understand the reality of the situation and the possible negative things that can happen... I need the people around me to be positive and supportive.  ((hug))... 

Spartan0627

I definitely would have cried, too. It is a very sensitive/touchy subject. I understand your mother wasn't trying to be insensitive, but she still hurt your feelings nonetheless. I hope you have a happy and healthy 9 mos. and are able to enjoy the baby shower you deserve, even if you decide to way until late in the game... or EVEN after the birth of your child.

chrisleath

I don't think you were being too sensitive.  You deserve a baby shower when everyone else would have a baby shower, not after the baby is born "in case" something were to happen.  My mom got super excited when she found out I was pg and started talking about the baby shower and I slowed her down telling her lets get a heartbeat first and even then wait until I am firmly in my third trimester....Anyway don't worry about melting down...I was ready the fifty shades of grey trilogy ad cried during it?!?!?  Who cries while reading fifty shades?!?!?