- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Blended Families
frustrated
my SD is 8 and today my grandparents came by as they were leaving i told them we would go out to play for a few min... i let them go first being older and carring things in thier hands they were being slow.SD tried to push her way around them about knocking my grandma down I told her to stop and wait till they were out the door before trying to go out. She flat out turned around mad and tried to shoved me down. I sent her to sit on her bed. my grandparents said i was being mean ?!? so I'm supposed to let her shove me and get away with it... I don't think so! she is sitting in chair till DH gets up he works 3rd shift so he won't be up for awhile.
Honestly he will proabably just tell her thats wasn't nice and let it go. My son would have gotten his little butt swatted and then timeout. DH gets mad that I say he makes a difference in way we disipline the two and today will prove it. I don't feel comfortable doing anything to her because In past SD has lied said I choked her so all i ever do is make her sit and wait on dh. I am getting to the point though that I am not comfortable in my own house when shes here her attitude toward me has gotten worse and worse. Nothing has changed its been same schedule same everything since she was 3 and BM said shes been getting temper at her house. I thought the attitude was supposed to come when they hit puberty??
This discussion has been closed.
Re: frustrated
I hope in addition to the time-out you didn't let her go outside to play. you need to sit down and tell her what she did was not appropriate and as a result she is in time-out and will not get to go outside.
personally, I spank on occasion, but only DS, I would never lay a hand on SD as she is not my child. that being said, if she did something absolutely attrocious, I'm sure DH would spank her. Its tough being in a blended family, I'm pretty sure SD has never been spanked by BM, so if DH were to spank her god knows what sort of uproar that would start.
you and DH need to have a discussion on parenting similarly. yes, he needs to address the issue, but I don't think she needs to be spanked for what she did. a time-out, and not going outside should be enough punishment.
What she did was not acceptable and she should be punished. I think having her sit in time out for hours and then being further punished is not something I would do. (you didn't say how long she was going to sit there so I'm not sure how long is a long time.) EDIT It's only not something I would do because it sounds like an extended punishment, I would either do the time out or something else. To each their own, just my opinion.
I agree with you, I do think it would be wrong for you to spank her. (I know you didn't) It's also wrong for you to expect your husband to spank her if that's not the form of discipline he would like used for his child. Your son would have been spanked and that's your choice. His daughter doesn't have to be. The decision of whether or not to spank the girl is really up to her parents regardless of wether or not your son is spanked. I hope I'm getting my point accross properly. Both kids don't have to be punished the same for it to be equal.
Does he not discipline her at all? That would be a big problem. Or is it that your styles of discipline are different....that is something you can work on together so it doesn't feel like one kids is treated better.
EDIT I usually get a lot of trouble from people because I do not believe in spanking as a form of discipline. I respect that we all have to do what we feel is best.
Getting overly excited and trying to shove past an elderly person (or anyone for that matter) is pretty normal behavior for even an 8 year old. It's rude and needs to be corrected. However, the 8 year old trying to shove YOU down when you're 36(?) weeks pregnant?! Not ok. At all. Discipline is necessary. She's not a toddler having a tantrum, she could have potentially hurt you and the baby.
It might be time for her to get into some counseling. Maybe the arrival of the baby has her worried about her role in the family, maybe there are a lot of changes that she just hasn't adapted to yet. But she should start seeing someone so she can start working through these issues.
Created by MyFitnessPal - Free Weight Loss Tools
I agree with this.
What she did was definitely wrong, and needs to be addressed by DH. If you think there is a difference in the way your kids are disciplined you and DH should really talk that out. But I think your expected arrival could have a lot to do with her behavior. She may be nervous about where she will stand when the baby comes, and that could be pretty scary for her. My SS is almost 9, & he has also developed quite an attitude as of late. However, we have an 8 month old in the house & BM has a 5 month old (you do that math, lol), so there have been a lot of changes for him recently. I think it is angle definitely worth exploring.
Good luck!
I say that if you swat your kid for shoving then I am not surprised they learn to shove back, seriously.
As for your SD, I do not think her pulsing you should result if your DH hitting her to teach a lesson. But I do think she should be disciplined.
she sat in timeout 10min DH got up-and she ended up with 40$ toy few hrs later at the store. he just told her dont do it again and thats not nice...
IDK what to say i just feel like i can't say anything to SD just feed-bath-clean up after and take whatever bad attitude she decides to give for the day... my toes are killing me from tiptoeing around my own house all the time. there is no talking to DH he just says theres nothing he can do... taking things away doesnt help at one point all the had i her room was a bed and she could care less about it... just hoping it gets better eventually ...
If timeouts don't work, then start taking things away from her - my DD has had her ipod taken from her and it is punishment b/c she can't text, etc. with her friends.
Oops - sorry didn't see that taking things away don't work. How about things that are "not hers" - such as tv or computer time?
doesn't matter my DH went out today after spending 40 on a toy 2 days ago she hasn't touched... o and new shoes and other junk... btw I have 1 pair of flip flops no other shoes ATM my sneakers have no laces because i had to take them out put in SD shoes when she ruined hers... anywhoooo he went out today and got her new wii game... what did DS get 4 $1 lil cars and his own milkshake i didnt have to share with him today wow huh ...
Im having a super hormonal pregnancy day today so im not gonna write anymore b4 i look like a crazy evil witch...