Relativly New, Sharing Story

leyawain

so im not pregnant, and at this moment we are not ttc, but it seems to be getting closer. my huasband and i will be married a year on july second. also while i am thinking about it, i can not capitalize, type numbers, or do most punctuation. im on my cell phone, and i am unable to. i just wanted to say sorry before i forgot. anyway, so in a few days we will be married a year. we have been together for about three and a half. we currently live in a one bedroom apartment, so not ideal for having a child, but doable if needed. we dont intend on having a child here. we are looking to either purchase a house, which isnt going very far bc we have no credit, or to find at least a two bedroom house, renting of course. on fathers day my husband mentioned he wants us to try for a baby. he says in like the next six months. well that night i freaked out, without him noticing, of course. im kind of afraid of screwing up our future child. idk why exactly. we are not poor, by any means, cut we do cut it a little close sometimes. i know we can adjust as needed, but im nervous. i work in a deli at a grocery store, also as a cake decorator in the bakery. there is a lot of heavy lifting and chemicals that i use to clean and stuff. that makes me nervous at the same time. and we have two cats. both males, both fixed, both barely one yr old. i know there are a lot of things that i cant do with them, when i get pregnant. does anyone have advise, or tips? or general knowledge, lol. anything is helpful.

not_a_prettygirl

I am kind of in the same boat as you.  My husband & I just got married in May and are planning on TTC in about 6 months.  I just stopped taking my birth control bc I want to try to lose some weight before I get pregnant and we thought it would give my body a chance to get back into it's natural rhythm.  I am freaking out a bit too bc I worry we won't be careful enough using condoms and my husband still has another year left to finish his Bachelor's degree.  I also know that the cost of daycare is pricey.  My work said already that when I have a baby I can bring it to the office with me but I worry about how long that will last.  And I just asked about the cost of adding a child to my health insurance and it's gonna be another $400 a month.  It kind of bums me out bc while my husband and I make enough money to pay the bills now and live comfortable, I question whether we can fully afford a child.  I want to be a responsible parent and know that I can provide for all my child's needs but it just seems difficult.

Hopefully your job could modify your duties so you wouldn't have to do the heavy lifting or handle chemicals.  Or if that is the majority of your job, perhaps they could transfer you to another dept during your pregnancy.  As for the cats, you won't be able to clean the litter box while you are pregnant (which in my opinion is a perfect excuse to make your husband do the dirty work!)  My best advice is to plan & save as much as you can (which I know can be difficult.)  Oh - and get on some prenatal vitamins before you even start trying.  The folic acid in them is very importnant in the early stages of pregnancy.  Good luck to you!

katienoe

I think you two are doing the right thing at the moment, which is seriously talking about everything that needs to be considered for a child to enter your lives.  I've been married ~ 2 years, and we just started seriously talking and planning the TTC process.  I think the best advice I could give is to keep the communication lines wide open between you and your spouses.  You both sound like you're already doing that, and I think all the concerns you have (money/job, living arrangements, etc) can be handled as long as you craft a careful plan with your partner. 

Best of luck! 

leyawain

Sorry it took so long to reply, but thanks so much for the responses. my cousin and his gf just had a baby, and yesterday i got to hold him. i was so jealous but trying not to show it. ever since my husband and i talked about having children, i have had major baby fever, lol. i know when the time is right, it will happen.