Infertility Veterans

Both would-be EDs said no. :(

We've spent so much time going through the donors.  Finally found two we really like.  There aren't any other options in this pool for us.  Can't believe BOTH said no.  I'm starting to think that this just isn't going to happen.  :(
Baby girl Lila born 2013.
Baby boy Henry born 2015.
Expecting our capstone baby (boy) early March 2018.

Re: Both would-be EDs said no. :(

  • What? Why are they in the pool if they said no? That blows. Hugs.

    TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
    DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
    5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
    OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
    DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
    DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
    CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
    DE IVF #3 1/14  ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d

    DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
    First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!

    K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days

    imageimage

    SAIF/PAIF Welcome


    http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com

  • What do you mean they said no? Why are they in the database if they are not willing to cycle? I'm so sorry !!!! I really don't think this isn't meant to be, I think you're dealing with a flawed matching system, which they all are in some way or another. Hang in there, the perfect donor will present herself. Remember I have to wait months (or a year+) to find a donor.
    +++
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  • imageMrs.McIrish:
    What? Why are they in the pool if they said no? That blows. Hugs.

    Yes, in the pool.  The database is wickedly outdated. Turns out that it would have marked a fourth cycle for each.  The database showed that it would have been only their second cycles. I can't believe it.  Looks like we'll have to cycle out of state.  Fantastic. I left work early and I'm drinking wine.  :( 

    Baby girl Lila born 2013.
    Baby boy Henry born 2015.
    Expecting our capstone baby (boy) early March 2018.
  • imageEdwina.McDunnough:
    What do you mean they said no? Why are they in the database if they are not willing to cycle? I'm so sorry !!!! I really don't think this isn't meant to be, I think you're dealing with a flawed matching system, which they all are in some way or another. Hang in there, the perfect donor will present herself. Remember I have to wait months (or a year+) to find a donor.

    Thanks sweetie.  I'm so freaking upset.  I know they don't know who they're saying no to, but it feels like a rejection.  MH is wondering if they'd change their minds if we offered more money.  That makes me uncomfortable.   

    Baby girl Lila born 2013.
    Baby boy Henry born 2015.
    Expecting our capstone baby (boy) early March 2018.
  • Ugh - what a crappy database! I hope you find a clinic or agency with a better pool and the perfect donor for you.
    TTC #1 since June 2010
    Me: 36, DH: 42
    Dx: DOR and MFI

    DH: low count + very low motility; hormones all normal; Sperm DNA Frag. test = poor to fair; male karyotyping normal
    Me: FSH 13.4 + AMH 0.26 + hypothyroidism; Scratch the hypothyrodism (?); Blood clotting and immune panel all negative; endometrial biopsy normal

    IVF #1 (MDLF - Jul/Aug 2011): BFN (9R, 5M, 3F with ICSI, 3dt of 1 10-cell grade 2, no frosties)
    IVF #2 (EP-antagonist - Sep/Oct 2011): BFN (6R, 4M, 3F w/ ICSI, 3dt of 1 6-cell, 1 7-cell, grade 4s, no frosties)
    DE IVF #1 (shared cycle - June 2012): c/p (6R, 6F w/ICSI, 3dt 1 8-cell grade A- and 1 7-cell grade A-; no frosties)
    DE IVF #2 (shared cycle with new donor - Nov/Dec/ 2012): - BFP!!!!! 12/14/12. U/S on 12/27 shows twins!!!!!

    SAIFW/PAIFW
  • Well, I'm pissed they didn't update the database!  I'm sorry, Cheri.  Sad

    I would totally donate to you if my eggs weren't so effed up!

    My feet and Miss Heidi the rescue mutt!

    image

    15 treatment cycles: four early m/c
    Moving forward with domestic infant adoption!

    Home study approved 5/13, now just waiting...

  • imagesarahtoledo:

    Well, I'm pissed they didn't update the database!  I'm sorry, Cheri.  Sad

    I would totally donate to you if my eggs weren't so effed up!

    I know that. I heart you ST.   

    Baby girl Lila born 2013.
    Baby boy Henry born 2015.
    Expecting our capstone baby (boy) early March 2018.
  • reb259reb259 member
    I agree that is flucked up and I would complain and then find a new clinic.  Sorry...big hugs!
    I am AMA and all tests on H came back normal
    3 failed IVF with OE and 2 failed frozen DE cycles
    Last fresh hail mary DE cycle starting Feb 2013
    PAIF/SAIF always welcome
  • imagemtlaurel:
    Ugh - what a crappy database! I hope you find a clinic or agency with a better pool and the perfect donor for you.

    Thanks lady.  I'll gather myself and try somewhere else.  Hopefully it'll go better.  The problem is that I'm at an extremely successful clinic for DE.  I'm reluctant to leave because of it.   

    Baby girl Lila born 2013.
    Baby boy Henry born 2015.
    Expecting our capstone baby (boy) early March 2018.
  • It's probably not the compensation that's driving their decision and you shouldn't do anything that makes you uncomfortable. I know the whole process sucks a lot and can be full of complications and headaches, but I personally would want to look back with good memories. Then again, I'm not particularly good with shadows. Can the DE coordinator dig a little and see if they have scheduling conflicts or would reconsider at a later date? Maybe having some time to think about it would influence their decision. Do they have any donors not on the list or in the process of screening?
    +++
  • imagereb259:
    I agree that is flucked up and I would complain and then find a new clinic.  Sorry...big hugs!

    Thanks for the hugs reb.  It helps.   

    Baby girl Lila born 2013.
    Baby boy Henry born 2015.
    Expecting our capstone baby (boy) early March 2018.
  • That is RIDICULOUS. It's vitally important to work with up to date information, including the results of previous cycles. Good luck.
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  • imageamethystgrrl:
    That is RIDICULOUS. It's vitally important to work with up to date information, including the results of previous cycles. Good luck.
    I couldn't agree more.  I'm so sorry that the system seems f*d up(((hugs)))
    Me: 35 DH: 37 TTC since 4/2010
    DX: 6/9/2011: Azoo ICSI/IVF only option for biological child
    IVF #1: ER - 9/26 * ET - 10/1 * beta#1 10/13 - 140 * beta#2 10/17 - 477 * beta#3 10/20 - 1101
    1st u/s at 6w6d - one hb * 2nd u/s at 8w3d - no hb detected 11/10/11 * natural m/c 11/13/11
    FET #1 Jan/Feb 2012 - 3 delays - cancelled 2/13
    FET #1.2 - May/June 2012 - ET 6/6/* beta#1 6/15 - 95 * beta #2 6/19 - 322 * beta #3 6/22 - 940
    7/6 1st u/s @ 7 weeks - one beautiful hb - released from RE
    EDD 2/22/2013
    PAIF/SAIF/PGAL welcome
    imageimageimageimage
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • ((hugs)) I can't believe how unprofessional that is. It may just be a paycheck for them (whoever keeps it updated) but it truly affects peoples lives. If you can't do the job - get the F out!
    imageimage

    Dx: DH - Azoo, Me - Mild PCOS
    DH - sperm found! Seems to produce only for a few days every 70 days!
    Over 1 million in cryo in 15 vials over 6 samples
    IVF #1 - 1 beautiful expanded blast transferred, 4 snowbabies - beta #1 11/30/11 = BFFN
    FET #1, transfered 2 embies 2/16/12 = BFFN; 1 snowbaby left in cryo
    IVF #2 + CGH = 4 genetically normal embies on ice. FET September 26th
    SAIF/PAIF always welcome

    a special GL and prayers to my IF sister Gregermis

    image
    check out my blog!


  • I'm sorry, that is ridiculous that it was out of date. ((HUGS))
    Dx: High FSH, stage IV endo, homozygous C677T MTHFR and PAI-1
    Early loss 10/08
    Lap 1/09
    IVF #1 "natural IVF" - 1 egg retrieved, missed m/c
    Tried several mini-stim cycles with no response
    Switched clinics - dx'd as carrier for Fragile X
    IVF #2 MDL protocol Jan/Feb converted to IUI, BFN
    IVF #2 take 2: Antagonist, one embie, BFN
    IVF #3: Antagonist, no fertilization
    One last ditch effort at OE IVF (antagonist with Clomid) cancelled
    DE cycle #1 Jan/Feb 2011, BFP, ectopic
    DE cycle #2 June/July 2011 - BFP
    10/28/11 Baby girl lost at 17 weeks due to pre-term labor. We love and miss you.
    DE cycle #3 June/July 2012 - BFP, twins, both heartbeats stopped, D&C
    2 frosties but don't know what's next
    FET Dec 2012: BFP! Praying this one sticks for the long haul!
  • Hugs.  I'm so sorry. I know nothing about DE, but that is definitely screwed up.  I hope you find the perfect donor soon.
    TTC #1 since October 2008. Dealing with MFI.
    IVF #1 w ICSI in July 2010 = BFN
    IVF #2.1 in Oct 2010 converted to IUI = BFN
    IVF #2.2 w ICSI in Dec 2010 = BFN
    Met with new RE in new city on 1/31/11.
    IVF #3 w ICSI in April 2011. HPT on 5/9 = BFP!
    Beta #1 on 5/10 (10dp5dt) = 99.4. Beta #2 on 5/12 = 284. First u/s on 5/26. = Fraternal TWINS!
    Twin boys born & lost on 8/16/11 at 18w1d due to PPROM & preterm labor.
    IVF #4.1 in Jan 2012 converted to IUI on 1/7/12 = BFN
    IVF #4.2 w ICSI in Feb 2012. Lupron on 2/10. Stims on 2/18. ER on 2/29- 7R,6F
    ET scheduled for 3/5/12- nothing to transfer :(
    Dh seeing new MFI uro & Dh starting meds- June 2012.
    IVF #5 in Dec 2012 = BFFN.
    IVF #6 planned for Spring 2013. Praying for our take home baby/ies.
    **P/SAIF and P/SAL always welcome!**

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • You keep fighting! Do not give up! How often does their pool get updated? Maybe this place is not the right fit for you. Don't let one pool of donors get you down. The right one is out there. I had 2 other donors picked out before this one became ours. Just a minor bump in the road, all be it, very frustrating and disheartening.
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • Oh, honey. I'm so sorry. It doesn't sound like you're out, it just sounds like you need to find a different place to look at a donor pool! Sending tons of T&P your way. ::hugs::
  • WTF?!?  I am mad for you...I don't know if you would want to deal with that clinic if they can't even keep up their website :(  (((BIGHUGS)))
    Anniversary
    TTC #1 since 3/10:
    DX: Me-PCOS, retroverted/ tilted ute - DH- MFI, DH-4 mo of Clomid therapy= no improvement. Weekly HCG injections.
    Me-34, DH-33
    HSG- unsuccessful, SHSG (dialated)-no blockages
    7/11-Clomid (unmonitored) BFN,
    #1 Fresh IVF 9/11: w/ ICSI & AH (only option): (1 transfered, 8BF) = BFN!!
    #2 FET: 2 transferred (2 6BF) 12/11 = BFFN!!
    Surprise + HPT on break! 2/12 Beta 1: 6 Beta 2: <5 = c/p ( RE had given me provera... So pretty sure this ruined everything)<BR> #3 Fresh IVF 3/12: w/ ICSI & AH (2 transfered 8BF & 7BF, 1 to freeze) = BFMFN!
    New RE 5/12
    6/14 Hysteroscopy
    #4 Fresh IVF 8/12: 5dt of 2 5AB blasts = BFN!... what else is new?!?
    New RE insists its a transfer issue, immunology checked & good
    #5 IVF FET 1/13 under anesthesia : Two 5 day blasts transferred
    + HPT!! Beta1: 2315 Beta2: 6442 Beta3: 31,061
    First u/s 1/30/13: Shows 1 healthy heartbeat!!

    Was he was right? I wasted 4 IVF's and the doctors were not getting the catheter in?!?
    ~~ Bump Bestie/ IRL Lynn0926 ~~
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • ugh!  That sucks!!
    TTC #1 Since 4/2010, Cycle 30
    Positive for HLA-B27, I'm a mutant :p
    Testing - Me ok, gluten issue? DH - borderline count, low motility
    4/28/11 IUI#1 = BFP!(5/25), EDD 2/2/12 - m/c 5w3d
    7/3, 7/31, 9/25 - IUI#2-4=BFN
    IVF#1 - 1 blast = BFP!! (12/30), EDD 9/9/12, confirmed c/p 4w2d
    FET#1 3/2/12 - 2 blasts =BFP!! EDD 11/18/12, us#1 = twins! Confirmed m/c 5w6d
    4/20-surprise BFP and another c/p 4w2d
    FET#2 7/16/12 - 2 blasts = BFN
    FET#3 8/20/12 - 1 blast - BFP!! Beta #1-2=177, 354
    1st u/s 5w6d, one beautiful little HB :), 2nd u/s 146bpm
    baby girl born 5/10/13

    TTC#2 since 12/17/2014, Cycle 8
    Repeat Testing...FSH=12, AMH=3.8, AFC=28. 
    IUI#5 5/10/15- c/p?
    IVF#2 8/19/15 - cancelled due to cysts
    IVF#2 take two 10/2015 - 5 blasts frozen
    FET#4 12/11/2015 - BFN - 4 blasts remaining
    FET#5 2/18/16 - BFP!!!  Beta1-3, 126, 250, 745!!

    Image and video hosting by TinyPicLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    Tons of love and ((hugs)) to my IF sister NMscubagirl


  • ((HUGS)) That completely sucks. Sorry you were dealing with such an oudated database. Don't give up though...it just means your perfect donor is still out there, maybe in another pool. You'll find her!!
    2/11 Diagnosis: DOR-AMH .62, LPD and MFI-4% Morph
    IVF #1-July 2011 7/9/11-Started Stims
    7/20/11-ER:No eggs in 4/5 follicles. Left the 5th follie intact and converted to an IUI
    8/3/11-Beta #1=BFN,
    Nov, 2011 BFP #1=m/c at 7 wks 3 days
    11/11-AMH .47, IVF #2 March 2012...or not!! Surprise BFP on 2/19. Beta #1=161. Beta #2 305 Our little miracle girl is on her way! Due Oct 29, 2012
    <a href="http://s1207.photobucket.com/albums/bb461/andersenspics/?action=view
  • JM1977JM1977 member
    That is very discouraging that their database was not updated.  I can totally see why it feels like a rejection, but I hope with some distance you will be able to see it as a bump in the road that will ultimately lead you to your perfect donor.  (((HUGS))) 
    TTC with DOR, low morphology, fertilization issues
    IVF#1 Oct 2009 (CCRM) - BFN
    IVF#2 March 2010 - Poor response/cancelled
    DE IVF#1 Aug 2010 - BFN
    DE IVF#2 Dec 2010 - Transferred 1, 2 frozen - BFP!
    TTC#2 FET Jan 2013 - Transferred 1 - BFP!

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • LaLe09LaLe09 member
    i'm sorry, that's discouraging. I hope your perfect donor is just around the corner. Hang in there!!

    DH: Severe MFI/Azoo Me: Compound heterozygous MTHFR
    IVF #1= m/c- methotrexate @6w2d
    FET #1= BFN
    IVF #2= m/c- D&C @8w5d
    IVF #3= Beta #1 9dp5dt= 252, Beta #2 11dp5dt= 417, Beta #3 17dp5dt= 4,952
    US #2 @ 7w2d= twins, baby B measuring behind
    US #3 @ 8w5d= Baby A doing well, no HR in baby B
    *S/PAIF always welcome* BabyFetus Ticker
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