Worried about my reaction....

bsc01001

Hello Everyone,

I was never active on the miscarriage/pregnancy loss board mainly because when I found out we had miscarried in January- there was no heartbeat at our 10 week apt. Apparently the baby had stopped growing at 8 week (D & C followed) - I just wanted to forget it...wipe the slate clean and not try to further dwell on it.  I think I dealt with it OK as, and my DH was very supportive and I had very supportive friends and family.  Anyways, now I'm 6w 5d pregnant, which I am very excited and of course nervous about but I am worried about how I'm going to react going to my first ultrasound next Thursday.  I already see myself having a panic attack on the ride there.  In addition, if I once again hear, "I don't see a heartbeat" from the US technician I'm afraid of what my reaction will be.  To be honest, I can see a fit of rage happening, which is totally illogical but I have pictured in my head. 

I also know that this is something completely out of my control and I should just enjoy being pregnant, but the simple fact is, I can't do that.  I don't know what to do to calm these thoughts of mine but just saying "what will be, will be" is not working for me.  I'm just in a state of distress and I have no idea what to do...

Thanks for letting me vent...I just have a lot of emotions that I have no idea how to handle right now.

I'm wishing you all the best and hope you all have uneventful pregnancies and beautiful  babies.

 

princessbmw

You have come to the right place! Everyone here shares your worries and feels the same emotions. I also had a missed m/c and when the tech told me there was no hb, I was devastated. With the pregnancy, I had a lot of anxiety going into the first u/s. everything turned out fine. Just take one day at a time, one appt at a time. I know it's tough, but you can do it!

ilenegrace

First of all Congrats on your pregnancy! As the pp said you are def in the right place. Sorry you are having to go through this anxiety. It seems never ending for me. Hoping everything goes well at your appt and wishing you a H&H 9mos!

MoreThanABride

I hope you get good news.

jobiann

We all share your fears and I think we all get super anxious before our appointments...I know I'm going crazy for July 2nd to hurry up and get here.

((hugs)) to you!

DGentry731

I am sorry for your loss but congrats on the new pregnancy! I think many of us can relate to what you are feeling. There is no way to know how you will react but the best thing for you and your baby is to relax (much easier said than done). Good luck at your app. Hope to see good news.